Discworld Deathmatch

cat_rant

Apologies if this has been posted already.

Just reading the Guards books at the moment and was wondering who do you think would win in a fight

Carrot or Cohen (before the DW book "The last hero") --> you know before cohen become all uber powerful (dont want to spoil it for anyone who hasnt read it.

so round 1 is

Carrot from the Guards Vs Cohen


personally i reckon carrott he's got youth on his side in the 4th round

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

there ain't been a man yet cohen hasn't been able to beat

granted carrot has the muscles and "the sword", but he's an ankh morpork boy, cohen's an all round weathered hero

as is said in "interesting times", cohen has a lifetimes experience of not dying, and he's become very good at it.

AL][EN

Sorry was me that actually posted this was logged in under catastrophys profile by accident!! sorry cat!! Damn cookies!!!

here's the theroy that myself and friend came up with carrott would probably win in a straight up fight but there's no such thing as a straight up fight when your fighting cohen he'd probably cheat anyway as there isnt a fight he hasnt won!!

what do you think?

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

ewrm.. well what do you mean by straight fights?

the art of fisticuffs?

or them rules of fighting that vimes hates? .. (crap, can't remember the name.. count de something?)

no such thing as a straight fight, and we've never actually seen that carrot is a great fighter.. usually he doesn't *have* to fight, and when he does it's his size that gets him through.

cohen is just.. the man

Havelock

Straight fight, as in no buggery?

Cohen, Carrots stronger and Younger. But Cohen knows every trick in book, he'd know what Carrot was going to do before Carrot did.

AL][EN

Suppose you do have a point Cohen would never fight carrott in a fair fistycuffs fight. i dont think cohen knows how to fight like that with him its all teeth and a blur of motion followed by a knee to the groin then smash him over the head with a rock.

we'll give it to cohen then.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

although in the discworld it does depend on why they are fighting, and whether or not it's a million to once chance

as it was said in the last hero.. one man against 7, the one man is sure to win

Thanx 4 The Fish

Are the Deathmatch's to include only people ?? Death is not involved, neither are any auditors, War Famine or Mr. Soak. If that is the case then Lu Tze is gonna win no matter what happens.

§eth

Suppose you do have a point Cohen would never fight carrott in a fair fistycuffs fight. i dont think cohen knows how to fight like that with him its all teeth and a blur of motion followed by a knee to the groin then smash him over the head with a rock.

well you seem to be forgeting about Carrots Protective...the knee to the groin would only hurt Cohen...but all in all i think it would be Cohens victory

So how about Cohen Versus The Librarian

AL][EN

Yea im sure we could continue the Disworld deathmatch's

so were going to give round one to cohen then......

Death and the horsemen cant compete for obvious reasons
but if you think you can put a good deathmatch together post it hear we'll decide on a winner and then pick another match

the winner's of deathmatch can then go for the next round (if you want i could probably put a spreadsheet together with all the winners playing off - im really that bored) and eventually we can determine over time who the hardest charachter in DW is!!!


I'd have to give it give that one to the Librarian really i mean the thats one vicious ape were talking about, He can use his arms legs and teeth just like cohen really but i reckon over 10 rounds the librarian would win,

§eth

Yea he does have that habit of bouncing people on their heads...suppose it really comes down to wether cohen calls him a monkey or not

AL][EN

you deff right there if cohen called him a monkey i'd say it would be over in a few seconds

Chowley

Cohen.

AL][EN

Cohen? so that mean you vote for Cohen in Cohen Vs the Librarian

Chowley

Ahhhhhh didnt notice the fight was changed.

That really is too hard to call but I'd say librarian.
Probably toughest bugger on the Disc or Detritus.

§eth

well to be honest i think the toughest bugger on the disk is the patrician...anyone fighting him would be to paranoid about what Vetinary has put behind them to be worried about fighting...and if there not paranoid then whatever he put behind them will get them ...you cant beat that kinda genius...lol

AL][EN

oooo good one seth

what would you say to Lu Tze Vs The patrician??

bozzie

in cohen vs. librarian librarian would win but it would be close


in Lu Tze v.s Patrician Lu Tze would shade it coz of that whole wrapping time around himself (and that recapitation power rocks)

AL][EN

I'll probably do a proper spreadsheet up over the next few days with matches and poll the results see if people want to vote for the hardest nut on the DW!!

im up for mad hamish!!

AL][EN

Im compiling a list of DW charachters for the DW deathmatch if there's anyoone in paticluar you want to see post them here i'll post a list of charachters i have already tomorrow once i have 32 i'll do the draw for the death matches

Chowley

Tell us who is on your short-list so we dont waste our time posting five or six characters you already have.:D

AL][EN

I'll post em tomorrow have em back at the house
was thinking of doing a poll every two weeks and we'll see who gets the most votes goes onto the next round

TheSonOfBattles

I'd love to see Granny Weatherwax in the deathmatch, and someone fighting greebo would be cool.
Maybe werewolf Angua v. Greebo?

af666x

Here's a tough one - the librarian or the luggage? Hmm...

TheSonOfBattles

I reckon the Luggage would win hands down.

Simply because nothing seems to be able to faze or hurt the Luggage, it's about as implacable as you can get.

The Librarian might have the strength and agility, but it's no good if your opponent doesn't particularly care is it?

Maybe the librarian could pull out some magic fire on it's as* or something though.

Also depends on whether or not the Luggage is near of far from it's master, and whether said master is in danger or not.

avatar

Angua vs. Greebo? Interesting.... but I'd say Greebo. This cat kills VAMPIRES, for gods' sake.

TheSonOfBattles

Yea, but only silver can really kill a werewolf.

Would Greebo know this, and would he be able to get some silver? Also what form would both of them fight in, human or animal?

af666x

My vision of fight (warped as usual)

They meet as animals
Face each other down
Angua being smarter, reverts to human form - bare a*s naked
Seduces Greebo into human form
He comes closer....

*WHAM!*

Jugular vein removed in a single werewolf reverted shapey move. Quick fight really.

Let's see if anyone gets this...

The Hooligans up against the Bloods in L.A.

TheSonOfBattles

Yes, but Greebo has been mentioned as being particularly sexually attractive to female's. Even Granny and Nanny Ogg felt a bit of it around him. So would Angua be able to do it, and would she be able to do it before Greebo did something to her?

What's the Blood and Holligan's?

af666x

Bill hicks. Run a search for mp3's of his. He's a standup comedian. Look for clip entitled 'Hooligans'

Enjoy

TheSonOfBattles

He the american guy? I'm pretty sure i've seen him once or twice before. If it's who I think it is, he's high-larious.

Will do that search though, cause if it's the guy I think it is, i'll love 'em.