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One-Liner Jokes

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Comments

  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,174 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Penn's aunts made great apple pies at low prices.

    No one else in town could compete with the pie rates of Penn's aunts.



  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,174 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    What do you call a woman with one leg longer than the other ? Eileen

    And if she also has a kitten on her shoulder ? Kathleen

    What do you call a woman both legs the same length ? Noleen



  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,174 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Was in town earlier, and all feral kids were saying effin' this and effin' that…

    Guess they didn't do so well in the Leaving Cert.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,196 ✭✭✭barneygumble99


    Accidentally drank a bottle of invisible ink earlier.
    In hospital now, waiting to be seen.



  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators Posts: 19,799 Mod ✭✭✭✭Sam Russell


    The fire chief reported that last year there was a lot of arson about.



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  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,174 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    what do you call …

    a man lying down at your front door ? Matt

    a woman between two rows of houses ? Ally

    a man at the end of a pier ? Rod

    a tall man at the seaside ? Cliff



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,352 ✭✭✭Porthallian


    Setting up a website for tradesmen to share photos of their vehicles.

    OnlyVans.



  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,174 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    During the "Ulster Says No" campaign in the north there was graffiti that said "The Man from Del Monte says Yes"

    And underneath there was more graffiti …

    "and he's an orangeman"



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,196 ✭✭✭barneygumble99


    I’m off to grow some facial hair above my top lip.
    Must dash.



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