One-Liner Jokes

xochillixo · 23-08-2009 6:22pm

dont think im in the right thread for this 1 but here goes...
whats the difference between a ginger and a brick???
bricks get laid

no offence ment to ne gingers!!!

Fabritzo · 24-08-2009 10:16am

A N G B

that's bang out of order

byrner88 · 24-08-2009 10:07pm

son says to dad "i learned how to write in school today". "well done says the father what did you write?" " i don't know says the son i don't know how to read"

major bill · 24-08-2009 11:00pm

jaysus anyone else notice zebra is an anagram of dsylexia!!!!!

admiralofthefleet · 26-08-2009 8:43pm

Ive never understood decimals - I cant see the point

Hagar · 28-08-2009 10:52am

To err is human, to arrrrrr is pirate.

ihatewallies · 28-08-2009 5:45pm

95 pages and nobody has produced a joke yet

byrner88 · 28-08-2009 5:52pm

Got stung by a bee today cnut charged me €50 for a jar of honey!!

kt217 · 28-08-2009 10:42pm

hitler walked in to a room with a friend and said to his generals i want you to kill 6 million jews and one australian the generals look at each other then look at hitler any but my furhrer why one australian hitler turned to his friend and said see they never ask about the jews

pebbles21 · 28-08-2009 10:54pm

Things are so bad at the moment all i have to eat is some herbs i get from a friend of mine

Im living on borrowed thyme !

Hagar · 29-08-2009 12:24pm

314 backwards spells pie.

major bill · 29-08-2009 12:52pm

i like to treat women like golf. if she aint holding my wood she should be holding an iron:eek:

Oliverdog · 30-08-2009 11:16pm

Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water ?

If they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat.

BaZmO* · 31-08-2009 8:20am

Rang the Swine Flu hotline the other day. Really bad connection, all I could get was crackling.

fairyj · 01-09-2009 1:10am

I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I said, "Dude, you have to wait."

If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be screwed up.

I would imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.

I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.

I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too.

Sometimes I get really lonely. Especially when I'm throwing a Frisbee.

I am wearing a vest. If I had no arms, it would be a jacket.

willypoo · 01-09-2009 1:27am

a women goes into a library and asks for a book on sexism

the librarian told her to get back to the kitchen!

a woman went into the library and asked for a book on double entendres.
so the librarian took her up the rear aisle and let her have it!