Alternative ending to Empire Strikes Back

TinCool

ALTERNATE ENDING: EMPIRE STRIKES BACK

A furious light sabre duel is under way. DARTH VADER is backing
LUKE SKYWALKER toward the end of the gantry. A quick move by
Vader, chops off Luke's hand! It goes spinning off into the
ventilation shaft. Luke backs away. He looks round, but realizes
there's nowhere to go but straight down.

DARTH VADER: "Obi Wan never told you what happened to your
father."

LUKE: "He told me enough! He told me you killed him!"

DARTH VADER: "No! I am your father!"

LUKE: "No, it's not true! It's impossible."

DARTH VADER: "Search your feelings; you know it to be true."

LUKE: "NO!"

DARTH VADER: "Yes, it is true and you know what else? You know
that brass droid of yours?"

LUKE: "Threepio?"

DARTH VADER: "Yes, Threepio, I built him when I was seven years
old."

LUKE: "No."

DARTH VADER: "Seven years old? And what have you done? Look at
yourself, no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate your own
ship out of the swamp."

LUKE: "I destroyed your precious Death Star!"

DARTH VADER: "When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly
destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!"

LUKE: "Well, it's not my fault."

DARTH VADER: "Oh, here we go. 'Poor me, my father never gave me
what I wanted for my birthday, boo hoo, my daddy's the Dark Lord
of the Sith.. waahhh wahhh!'"

LUKE: "Shut up."

DARTH VADER: "You're a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had
exterminated the Jedi knights!"

LUKE: "I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon!"

DARTH VADER: "Oh, for the love of the Emperor, 10 years old,
winner of the Boonta Eve Open. Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer,
right here baby!"

Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step toward it.

DARTH VADER: "I was wrong. You're not my kid. I don't know whose
you are, but you sure ain't mine."

Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down
the shaft.

Darth Vader looks after him.

DARTH VADER: "And get a haircut!"

irishman_abroad

DARTH VADER: "And get a haircut!"

Icing on the cake --- CLASS

EdBanger

8¬D

Tyrrial

that's the best thing i've read in ages!

LoneGunM@n

Definately 1 of the funniest things I've read in a while!!

& as said before

DARTH VADER: "And get a haircut!"

is the icing on the cake.

Mac daddy

5 stars for you :ninja:

gerire

can we find a sixth star please for this guy ?
Very good

avatar

can't type.... in tears of laughter..... bladder control slipping.... falling off chair.....

*giggle* *giggle* *twitch*

Not bad, mate. Not bad....

littleninja

BRILLIANT I love it!!! tee hee 5 stars for this one no doubt about it

Havelock

Needed to be said, he-stair-ical, laughed in course, got given out to for not paying attention, re-read and laughed again.

Vader

fock sake. I thought you were going to say that robot is your sister! Think about it, him there always with that helmet and body suit and he spends all his time hooked up to that computer in the sphiracle room.

Vader

help me out here, in episode one vader is 7 years old and the queens like late 20's. So how do they end up having kids?
Fair play to ya bucko!!

avatar

He was 10, and she was 14.

Tellox

jesus christ that was classic!

AL][EN

pure brillance, :cool: deffinatly going round to everyone in the office

Wook

good good !!!

Vader

if she was 14 how come she was queen for two terms? what kind of sad planet elects a 14 year old to rule them? Who the foch elects a queen?
Where does it say she is 14?

Victor

Originally posted by Vader
help me out here, in episode one vader is 7 years old and the queens like late 20's. So how do they end up having kids?
Fair play to ya bucko!!

Surely **you** of all people should know.

Not sure about the characters ages (altough Vader is 10 in Ep. I), but in Episode One the actors were 10 & 18, in Episode Two they were both 21.