Laugh I nearly..........

gandalf

This was mailed to me this morning I thought I'd share it with you.

Gandalf.


THESE USEFUL QUOTES WERE REPORTEDLY TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE
PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS
1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has
started to dig."
2. "His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid
curiosity."
3. "I would not allow this employee to breed."
4. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a
definite won't be."
5. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat
in a trap."
6. "When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet."
7. "He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle."
8. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy."
9. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to
achieve them."
10. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."
11. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the
better."
12. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all
together."
13. "A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."
14. "The guy is a couple of french fries short of a happy meal"
15. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."
16. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime."
17. "He's been working with glue too much."
18. "He would argue with a signpost."
19. "He has a knack for making strangers immediately."
20. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."
21. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."
22. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other
one."
23. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on."
24. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection."
25. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."
26. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't
coming."
27. "Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it."
28. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."
29. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."
30. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."
31. "It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm."
32. "One neuron short of a synapse."
33. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled."
34. "Takes him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes."
35. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead."

LoLth

Hehe! Nice one!



this one's making a quick round of the office!

J.