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Jokes

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  • 10-06-1999 4:12pm
    #1
    Riker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 141 ✭✭


    Nearly shat myself when Monty sent me these, enjoy:

    Q. What's the difference between Clinton and JFK?
    A. One got his head blown off and the other was assassinated.

    Q. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact with women?
    A. Because breasts don't have eyes.

    Q. What makes Mike Tyson's eyes water during sex?
    A. Mace

    Q. How does a man show he's planning for the future?
    A. He buys two crates of beer.

    Q. If a man speaks in a forest and a woman doesn't hear him...
    A. Is he still wrong?

    Q. What is the latest game at the Whitehouse?
    A. Swallow the leader.

    Q. Why do Jewish men like to watch porn movies backwards?

    A. They like the bit where the hooker gives the money back

    Q. What do breasts and horses have in common?
    A They are both measured in hands

    Q. What do you call 3 dogs and a blackbird?
    A. The spice girls

    Q. What is the difference between the English cricket team and Paula Yates?
    A. Paula Yates has more chance of bringing the ashes back.

    Q. Why do blondes throw breadcrumbs down the toilet?
    A. To feed the toilet duck.

    Q. Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist?
    A. Because you could easily fit another pair of breasts in there.




Comments

  • Options
    #2
    Kegser
    Closed Accounts Posts: 793 ✭✭✭Kegser


    Oh lordy. Lordy lordy lordy.

    Kegs.


  • Options
    #3
    Jay
    Closed Accounts Posts: 411 ✭✭Jay


    om nyom
    nice one


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