Hitman

hussey · 25-09-2003 9:39am #1

>>Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their
>>local
>>golf course when a chap carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you
>>mind if join you? My partner didn't turn up."
>>
>>
>>"Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed
>>the game and the company of the newcomer. Part way around the course,
>>one
>>of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"
>>
>>
>>"I'm a hit man," was the reply.
>>
>>
>>"You're joking!" was the response.
>>
>>
>>"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a
>>beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here
>>are
>>my tools."
>>
>>
>>"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I
>>take a
>>look? I think I might be able to see my house from here." So he picked
>>up
>>the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house.
>>
>>
>>"Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see
>>right in the window."
>>
>>
>>"Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can see she's naked!
>>What's that? Wait a minute, that's my neighbour in there with her ......
>>He's naked as well! The b*tch!"
>>
>>
>>He turned to the hitman, "How much do you charge for a hit?"
>>
>>
>>"I do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the
>>trigger."
>>
>>
>>"Can you do two for me now?"
>>
>>
>>"Sure, what do you want?"
>>
>>
>>"First, shoot my wife, she's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the
>>mouth.
>>Then the neighbor, he's a mate of mine, a bit of a lad, so just shoot
>>his
>>d*ck off to teach him a lesson."
>>
>>
>>The hitman took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a
>>few
>>minutes.
>>
>>
>>"Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.
>>
>>
>>"Just wait a moment, be patient," said the hitman calmly, "I think I can
>>save you a grand here....."
>>
>>