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Haiku's

Raphael · 2003-10-24 19:46:38

Ok, thought this might be kinda interesting, twas inspired by macdaras scarily good poem. Ill kick things off Summer is ending Leaves float gently from the trees All the world is dark Sorry if its a tad depressing, but im not really a lolipops and sunshine kinda guy also no stealing haikus from cryptonomicon!

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24-10-2003 8:46pm

#1

Raphael

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Ok, thought this might be kinda interesting, twas inspired by macdaras scarily good poem. Ill kick things off

Summer is ending
Leaves float gently from the trees
All the world is dark

Sorry if its a tad depressing, but im not really a lolipops and sunshine kinda guy

also no stealing haikus from cryptonomicon!

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#2 24-10-2003 9:21pm
s0l

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For the last time I didnt write it =/
oh and

cold floor tiles
missed a kick at the fridge door
it closed anyway

Haiku by Jack Keroauc
used it in my junior cert couldnt think of anything else.

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#3 24-10-2003 9:28pm
Raphael

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Eh macdara, correct me if im wrong but isnt there 3 syllables in the 1st line of that.

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#4 24-10-2003 10:10pm
Zounds

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u need to know haikus for the J cert? :eek:

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#5 25-10-2003 11:26pm
Raphael

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Morning grows darker
Angry thunderclouds roll in
Despair fills the air

Hmm, depressing again. There may be something wrong with me

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#6 26-10-2003 4:57pm
nosmo

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Originally posted by Jaffer
Eh macdara, correct me if im wrong but isnt there 3 syllables in the 1st line of that.

It's what's called a western haiku. The elegance of Japanese allows the limit of syllables to make the poem more beautiful, but its just clumsy in english.

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#7 26-10-2003 7:00pm
Raphael

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ok, im confused, traditional haikus are 5, 7, 5 right?

Macdaras was 3, 7, 5

thats working to an even more restrictive limit... or have i misunderstood?

ps

The red sun rises,
Sheperds hide and their wards flee,
Terror stalks the land

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#8 26-10-2003 9:10pm
Spenguin

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That last one was 5, 8, 5. The one about the shepard.

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#9 26-10-2003 9:24pm
Raphael

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I was treating cower as a one sylabble word, but i see your point. consider it changed.

BTW

Error in Grammar,
Corrected by SPenguin,
Thank you for your time.

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#10 30-10-2003 9:09pm
sk_irl

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This one's a bit ****e but meh:-

Summer came and went
the fun dublin all spent
back to school i went

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#11 04-11-2003 1:50pm
stevanavich

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I'm captivated,
by a girl of great beauty.
I cannot compare.

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#12 04-11-2003 2:45pm
Havelock

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My One Love,
Source of all Sun
But now gone.

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#13 04-11-2003 2:47pm
Havelock

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Having trouble counting my syllables, anyone know a checker. I get stuck changing from french into english, diffrenet pronunciations.

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#14 04-11-2003 8:20pm
stevanavich

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my moral status,
now deceased and buried deep,
why do my lungs hurt?

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#15 04-11-2003 8:51pm
stevanavich

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.

i adore haikus,
they have structured syllables,
this is a haiku.

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#16 04-11-2003 9:10pm
Raphael

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Nice one steven mate!
Its fun to talk in haiku's
Don't you think people?

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#17 04-11-2003 10:52pm
Crash

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oh god no not this
why must we talk in haiku?
my head hurts quite bad.

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#18 05-11-2003 9:01am
Mystic Fibrosis

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Your god this thread sucks
Haikus require no skill
I'm programmed to kill

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#19 05-11-2003 9:58pm
Liquorice

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Communication
In haikus-What next, pray tell?
In drama form too?

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#20 05-11-2003 11:45pm
Capt'n Midnight

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Lots of recent ones -Politics - Dr Toast

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#21 15-11-2003 8:29pm
Raphael

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This thread is dying
Haikus will be gone from boards
Dont let this happen!

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#22 22-11-2003 8:13pm
Awayindahils

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Thank God for that small
Mercy i hate all haikus
This one included

Im rather inpressed with that i didnt think id be able to write one even one as bad as the one i did write.If its wrong dnt bother telling me.

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#23 26-11-2003 6:04pm
tibilt

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a blistered faith screams
reasons gone convictions bleed
answer me this...why?

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#24 26-11-2003 6:15pm
magpie

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He looks under the bed
and finds
a big gun

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#25 26-11-2003 6:17pm
tibilt

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the gun is loaded
357 caliber
potent love missiles

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#26 26-11-2003 9:05pm
Raphael

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Originally posted by magpie
He looks under the bed
and finds
a big gun

WTF was that?
A Haiku is 5,7,5
That was just plain weird!

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#27 26-11-2003 9:21pm
magpie

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Nice continuation tibilt

Anyhoo, it's a quote from a film called "Miami Blues".

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#28 27-11-2003 12:38am
tibilt

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stop being so pedantic jaffer. haiku is poetry. true poetry is not limited by such sadistically cruel boundries. if your going to write on the haiku thread at least write a haiku. thank you kindly magpie. by the way jaffer - i like your conversational haikus.

jingle bells ring once
die and come again too soon
why destroy magic?

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#29 27-11-2003 5:45pm
Raphael

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I was just trying
To keep the thread accurate
And thank you tibilt

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#30 27-11-2003 6:21pm
magpie

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Here's a new sub-category. Haiku about 1916 leaders!

Goggle-eyed Patrick H Pearse
Spastic visionary
Of a bloody new dawning

Let's see your contributions....

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#31 27-11-2003 6:40pm
ColinM

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Originally posted by tibilt
stop being so pedantic jaffer. haiku is poetry. true poetry is not limited by such sadistically cruel boundries. if your going to write on the haiku thread at least write a haiku. thank you kindly magpie. by the way jaffer - i like your conversational haikus.

jingle bells ring once
die and come again too soon
why destroy magic?

I wouldn't call that
pedantry - what he said was
quite legitimate.

If you want to write
some poetry in free verse
pick another thread!

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This discussion has been closed.