He he

malico

>
> Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
> One turns to the other and says "dam"
> **********
> Two peanuts walk into a bar
> One was a salted.
> **********
> A jump-lead walks into a bar.
> The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
> **********
> A sandwich walks into a bar.
> The barman says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here."
> **********
> A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
> **********
> A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and
> says: "A beer please, and one for the road."
> **********
> Two aerials meet on a roof, fall in love get married.
> The ceremony wasn't much but the reception was brilliant.
> **********
> Two cannibals are eating a clown.
> One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
> **********
> "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The green, green grass of home'." "That
> sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."
> "Is it common?"
> "It's not unusual."
> **********
> Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly
> "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
> "I don't believe you," said Dolly.
> "It's true, no bull!"
> **********
> Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
> One says, "I've lost my electron."
> The other says, "Are you sure?"
> The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
> **********
> Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bullsh#t before
> **********
> A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says,
> "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? "
> "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him"
> So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
> Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
> "What? Because he's cross-eyed?"
> "No, because he's really heavy"
> **********
> I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't
> find any.
> **********
> I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he
> couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.
> And he said, 'no, the steaks are too high.'
> *********
> My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli.
> He was pulled in by a strong currant.
> *********
> A man walks into doctor's office.
> "What seems to be the problem?" asks the doc.
> "It's... um... well... I have five pen!ses." replies the man.
> "Blimey!" says the doctor, "How do your trousers fit?" "Like a
glove."
> **********
> Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered
> with nuts & hundreds and thousands.
> Police say that he topped himself.
> **********
> What do you call a fish with no eyes?
> A fsh
> **********
> Two fish are in a tank
> One says to the other "I'll man the guns, you drive"

Havelock

I love those jokes. 5 stars.

Tellox

> Two cannibals are eating a clown.
> One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"



REALLY REALLY HATE THAT JOKE


but aside from that,they were nice.

hedgetrimmer

"Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bullsh#t before"

A diamond among the rough

quank

werent these jokes just posted like a few weeks ago
STOP STEALING OTHER PEEPS JOKES
ahem:rolleyes:
:ninja:

waffles

what does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?
wipes his arse