Flashbacks

Big Chief

Recently i heard a couple of folk mentioned they suffered from flashbacks from drug use (bad trips to be precise)

I suffer from these at the moment, well i say that but they started back at the end of august, they have pretty much died away now..

I will explain this as best as i can and try to make as much sense as possible (notice the word TRY)

I initially got these after taking a load of drugs at reading festival and they first occured while i was in work, my family (mum, gran, brother, sister that i know of) suffered from panic attacks but i only learned of this about 3 weeks after taking the first one, i tried to go about life as normal in those 3 weeks which wasnt very successful as i was taking these panic attack things on a regular day to day basis (if youve ever had a bad trip, this is the best way to explain what i was going through, the chance of taking a bad trip EVERY day without the use of drugs..)

So after finally thinking i was going nuts i went back home to glasgow for a weekend to visit my family and an old counsellor i went to before i moved to ireland to speak it over with him and get his opinion, after seeking all this i was told to see my GP which i did when i got back to ireland. He put me on what was to be a 4 month course of 20 mg cipramil and xanax to help until the cipramil had time to work.

I still got these on a regular basis (apart from when taking xanax which was great in terms of getting rid of these, apart from making me feel drowsy alot of the time, but hell it was better than getting those panic attacks. but when off them i would still suffer badly from them, since i had a history of drug dependancy when i was younger the GP refused to give me more xanax as they are addictive, my problems started again almost immediately in that i took crazy spells. For you see taking these panic attacks/anxiety attacks/ (or what i later found out to be flashbacks but will get to that later) is something i would not wish upon my worst enemy, you lose pretty much what feels like control over your own mind and what feels like your body, you are in a daze and you find yourself trying to do normal things like shopping or working and you just want to run as fast as you can, to where i have no idea but you just have to get out of that enviroment before you explode... (ok enough about what it feels like..)

After problems persisted my GP said he was going to refer me to a psychiatrist on baggot st hospital, which ive been going to for a couple of months now and things have been progressing, apart from they upped my dose a few times as 20mg wasnt working, 30mg wasnt working so now been on 40 for the past 4 weeks or something and it seems to be doing something right.

So I go back for an appointment on friday afternoon to check up on things, and its a new person as the old psychiatrist moved back to australia, she reads over my files and tells me that i suffered from flashbacks and panic attacks... I was never told from the previous person about the flashbacks (atleast not that i remember of) and it all made alot of sense when she told me, this is what i thought i was getting but put it down to panic attacks. I took a bad trip while at reading festival and this is when all this started, i dont get flashback of memorys, just of the feeling that happened hence why everyone felt like i was taking a bad trip. Now i have taken a fair amount of drugs in my past, but that was over 2 years ago, i made the exception of taking a few things at festivals (i had never touched ecstacy as i said i would NEVER do it, but ended up doing it while drunk with my ex gf at witnness 2003 and had a good experience with them hence trying them again at reading festival).

So to my question...

People said they suffered from flashbacks, ever since learning of this on friday its put me a bit on edge as i dont know if the medication im currently taking will get rid of this or not and im kind of a bit in fear sometimes (depending on the day/night thought process..) of these happening again. I have been taking xanax to goto work to make sure it dosent happen in work but i feel as if im maybe starting to get a lil dependant on those and maybe time to get off them, but the main point is to the people who said they had flashbacks, how long did they last for and did they totally dissapear?

I still get the odd 5 minute or less ones but nothing compared to the ones that lasted for an hour upwards when these first started. Do they just gradually go away completely? I live in fear of these happening again and i guess my life has been a bit down lately because of it, im getting better yes and compared to last august im feeling tons better but still its always on my mind.

I would look at the information available but i would prefer to know from people first hand that suffered from these (preferably through bad trips from drugs but whatever..)

Thoughts? advice.

To be truthful i went for my break mid writing this and kinda forgot where i left off, so tried to get back on track without losing what i was talking about, was just going to delete it but decided i would like some advice from the ppl who got these as it may take some ease off my mind to say the least...

Cheers

Big Chief

wow didnt think i wrote that much :rolleyes:

always was known for rambling i suppose..

Catsmokinpot

unfortunately my friend people who take one tab of lsd can get flashbacks for the rest of their lives also the fact that your family has a history of panic attacks doesnt help things

trips change your brain in ways you cant even imagine the lsd replaces brain chemicals that control thought and sight but you have to remember although this is true you can learn to control flashbacks a psychologist could possibly help and call this a long shot and you might not believe but spiritualist might too

Big Chief

the bad trip was on ecstasy not lsd, it was a bad pill i got.. maybe i should have been more precise

ive only ever tried acid once and that was back when i was 15, and it was a hilarious experience, so the flashbacks have nothing to do with lsd

i stopped drugs when i was 19, only done the odd thing for festivals last year which i wouldnt have done had i not been drunk

Catsmokinpot

you got a bad pill? did you get sick? soz man you said bad trip. what type exactly were they? were they speckled?

Catsmokinpot

never drink and take pills golden rule i have taken pills and they were a good experience and i have taken them regularly but i would not advise anyone to take them unless they really want to and are able to handle the effect they have on you

Big Chief

Originally posted by Catsmokinpot
you got a bad pill? did you get sick? soz man you said bad trip. what type exactly were they? were they speckled?

although i was in a very drunken state it was a mitsubushi if i remember rightly (my memory is terrible soz..)

I *think* (emphasised!) that there were blue specks, but to be truly honest i was hammered at the time.

never drink and take pills golden rule i have taken pills and they were a good experience and i have taken them regularly but i would not advise anyone to take them unless they really want to and are able to handle the effect they have on you

i took alot of drugs when i was younger, i thought i was able to handle it as i had done them before, but it would appear i broke your golden rule on multiple occasions

as for being sick, do you mean like puking? i spent the week off work after coming back from reading due to my head being an absoloute mess and not able to think properly (felt a bit like a comedown, but ive not had comedowns last 5 days EVER and that was with flashbacks, the panic attacks started that week aswell). I took a fair amount of drugs that weekend though so blamed it on that but it never went away which led me to going to the docs..

I have got alot better i must admit with the cipramil im on, but yesterday i got a little 5 min thing which is probably the first one ive had in a week (or maybe 2, my memory is shìt as ive said).

so i guess this will go away like it has been gradually doing? i know most of it is about mind control as ive been to specialists in this and have learnt alot there.

It was only after the doc telling me about the flashbacks that i began to panic a bit as thought "so theres nothing i can do about this god awful thing", so i guess i posted here for reassurance from someone who has had them that they "WILL" go away, possibly to make me feel better about it.. not sure if that is the case or not, tad confused!

Catsmokinpot

speckled mitsubishi! that explains it, they're mental! dont quite know what the blue is :dunno: friend of mine took em at witnness too. they sometimes have ketimene in them sometimes methadone or heroine theyre brown speckles stay away from mitsubishis in general theyre are dangerous id never touch em

im not too sure about the blue. but their were some pills with the red bull symbol on them that were speckled blue and orange and they were fairly trippy i found out later that some drug dealers were mixing snowballs in to normal pills cause they couldnt get rid of em. so the blue might be something to do with snowballs.

in anycase if it was just a bad pill you will get over it dont worry yourself too much ive wigged out on pills my mum has a history of panic attacks im sure its alot to do with that but its nothing too serious dont take too much and steer away from the big boys like mitsubishis theyre too strong for most people

it takes a long time for drugs like ecstacy to get out of your system youll just have to wait till it gets out of there

Big Chief

i remember seeing specks, but to be fair i had downed the best part of a bottle of vodka before doing it, i remember it "didnt look right" though, what colour the specks were i cant remember exactly, as ive said i "think" it was blue, who knows.. done with now regardless.

Cheers for the info on mitsubushis though as wasnt aware of that, but think im just gonna steer clear of pills nowadays, and pretty much everything else and just stick to the occasional "smoke" at festivals and wait till my medication finishes so i can get back on the beer .

Played around with drugs over so many years, think ive had my fill really.

and yeh i think your right, having a history of panic attacks hasnt helped the situation what so ever, but its something i kind of knew i was going to have to deal with in my life, and although there was many a tough days/nights i have managed somehow, mostly with the support of my family around me, mam especially.. but i suppose i just wasnt ready for it and it has been kind of thrown towards me which it tough to deal with. Some days are easy and others can be pain stakingly hard, just have to take things a day at a time really and wish all is better soon enough

see how it goes from here i suppose, not much else i can do really

Dr. Loon

Originally posted by Catsmokinpot
speckled mitsubishi! that explains it, they're mental! dont quite know what the blue is :dunno: friend of mine took em at witnness too. they sometimes have ketimene in them sometimes methadone or heroine theyre brown speckles stay away from mitsubishis in general theyre are dangerous id never touch em

Dealers mixing methadone or heroin into E's?!?! Are you currently taking heroin or are you drunk?

Big Chief.... I don't think you actually can get flashbacks from taking E's. Unless there was LSD in them. I think you're just having panic attacks. I'm not definite on that though, so don't take my thoughts as too serious.

Either way I think the problem is solely in your mind and your control of your own mind. Keep seeing the psychologist for a while anyway.... he/she will help you to keep control. My Dad suffers from these attacks where he thinks he's going to die/about to have a stroke.... but there's absolutely nothing wrong with him. It's all in the mind, but if you allow it to take hold you could quite possibly bring sickness upon yourself.

Catsmokinpot

first of all i do not take heroin and think that those who deal or take it should be shot i think most will agree with me there plus im not drunk either

yes sometimes they do have ketemene and all sorts of **** in them and yes heroine and methadone sometimes speed sometimes drugs similar to ecstacy but more dangerous

no no their not flashbacks and yes indeed you get them from lsd and yes they probably are anxiety or panic which as i said i have "wigged out" and it is more than likely the drugs still in you system or as doc loon you could be bringing it on yourself

theyre not panic attacks but they do have something to do with it. when you take ecstacy you do get very emotional sometimes and it can last till long after you take the drug

a friend of mine went to see lord of the rings the two towers on newyears day after taking 3 pills the night b4 and he was crying his eyes out he said it was because he loved that film but everyone else knows it was because of the comedown

in anycase you will get over it. itl just take ya a bit of time

Caffine

Originally posted by Dr. Loon
Dealers mixing methadone or heroin into E's?!?! Are you currently taking heroin or are you drunk?

the do indeed, brown speckled ones are heroin, friend of a friend had a very bad experiance with um

hacktavist

Originally posted by Caffine
the do indeed, brown speckled ones are heroin, friend of a friend had a very bad experiance with um

This isnt true, the cost of heroin is alot higher than the cost of e (mdma).
The dealers/chemist's would make more money selling it as heroin rather than sell it cheaper as e.
It sounds like you took a snowball (dob) maybe? there quite trippy apparently.

echomadman

Oral ingestion of the minute amounts of heroin that makes up those brown speckles would have little or no effect on an average sized person , the whole e cut with heroin thing is crap imo, from what i've read no drug crimes related agency has ever found heroin in a pill, all kinds of other crap yes, but not heroin.

Big Chief, as regards the panic attacks my ex GF used to suffer from them, especially after smoking weed, (not hash for some reason, goes to show the crap we're smoking in this country) her description of the feelings were pretty much identical to yours, she found yoga to be very helpful in relaxing and calming down, especially the breathing excercises, it might be worth a look.


I think that your drug history may account for the severity of your attacks, i've taken a lot of acid/mushrooms e's .. well the full spectrum of illegal substances and know the depths of despair and terror you can be plunged into on a bad experience, I've also had my share of the ones you're on now, cipramil/xanax/gamanil etc. (all self prescribed though) and they're not a permanent answer, a lot of them can have long term dependancy issues and unpleasant side effects.
Watch out for the booze when you finish up on the meds though, alcohol is a potent depressant.
All you can do is watch yourself and make sure people close to you are aware of whats going on when you have an attack, I know from personal experience its terrifying when someone's having a panic attack and you don't know whats going on.
If the person with you knows whats happening they can generally help out a bit.

Good Luck

hacktavist

http://www.bluelight.nu/vb/showthread.php?postid=912506#post912506

Also lsd is out of your system in 72 hours and it doesnt replace any "brain chemicals"
MDMA is out after 3-5 days.

deimos

Is it true that the 'weed' floating about these days is not actually weed, just mdma and a small amount of lsd mixed together with a similar looking herb. I have tried other people's stuff the odd time and it did'nt smell like normal home-grown or even taste like it, but sure as hell it sent you flying a hell of a lot faster(like a totally different high),
and by the by a friend of mine did'nt begin to get flash backs till about 3 or 4 weeks after her first try of acid, they got worse for about 2 months but finally died off, I don't think she has had one in over a year. She went to a shrink, said it was the best thing she ever done.

Cake Fiend

Be very wary about taking advice like this from random people on the internet - Catsmokinpot for example is talking an impressive load of bollocks.

There is no standardization with ecstasy pills. Just because you take one pill with a certain symbol on them, it certainly doesn't mean another one you take a few weeks later with the same symbol will be from the same batch. Hell, even pills from the same batch can have varying amounts of active ingredient in them.
Mitsubishi-branded pills are some of the most common sold. To say that mitsubishis in general are any more dangerous than other pills is ridiculous.

Ketamine does not, as far as I'm aware, lead to flashbacks. Neither does MDMA.

The problem with illegal drugs in general is the fact that you don't always know what you're taking - the 'bad pill' you took may well have had more of some other drug than MDMA - 2CB, Ketamine and DXM are popular 'filler' substances for E pills. Some of these drugs can cause a hallucinatory state which can be unpleasant if you're not expecting it or used to it.

The bottom line, however, is that everyone is different. You seem to have suffered a particularly extreme case of flashbacks - maybe someone with similar experiences can give you better advice. Until then, do some research yourself and be careful about taking advice from faceless bulletin-board posters (yes, I realize the irony of this statement).

Caffine

Originally posted by hacktavist

It sounds like you took a snowball (dob) maybe? there quite trippy apparently.

wasnt me, it actually was a friend of a friend even tho i sounds like it was me :P

wasnt a snowball either, did know the name but cant remeber now, snowballs are differnt alright, and yes they are very trippy, friend took 3 and his brain wasnt exactly working for a week or so after, was funny but scary at the same time

as sico said tho no standardisation so god only knows wtf was in the ones i was refereing to in last post

SantaHoe

Originally posted by Dr. Loon
My Dad suffers from these attacks where he thinks he's going to die/about to have a stroke.... but there's absolutely nothing wrong with him.

Yeah that sounds familiar alright
I don't get them that bad anymore thankfully.
Hang in there cheif m8, and try laying off the caffene, a few years ago I used to drink (literaly) nothing but coffee and coke in the space of a day and it'd trigger off a panic attack of the ^above proportions.
I don't think mine were flashbacks though, they didn't feel like tripping or anything, so I dunno.

Big Chief

cheers for replies.

i didnt personally think it was flashbacks, but when you are suffering from panic attacks as some of you may know you start to let things run around in your head to much and it often ends up that you are your own worst enemy and you start to worry so much over what is most of the time just nothing atall... when i heard the doc say that it just kinda sent my head going 100mph and it got to me..

i still see the shrink but its now every 5-6 weeks as she seems to think im alot better than when i was when i first started to go there (which is true i suppose) as i was a physical and mental wreck during my first visits but ive noticed that other people seem to notice your progress alot better than yourself, all the people around me tell me im doing better but i cant really notice it, in my head my mind is still a bit of a mess and im trying to break out of this routine i have got myself into

and yeh santa i had to stop drinking coffee about 3 months back, as that always seemed to lead me into a pretty bad panic attack, i still drink coke though but more water than i used to drink before.

Until then, do some research yourself and be careful about taking advice from faceless bulletin-board posters (yes, I realize the irony of this statement).

yeh i realised this, but its good to talk about it which makes you feel better about what your going through, sometimes knowing that others have been through this and got over it is helpful aswell, and how they got over it.. as im open to suggestions(i remember one panic attack i "thought" i had forgot how to breathe properly, another one where i just said the serenity prayer about what felt like 300,000 times until it passed, they are something i wouldnt wish upon anyone)

all my family is back in scotland, they give me all the support they can from a distance, my new flat mate dosent know anything about this as personally i dont want to scare people off as i think now alot of it is just in my head, specialist said this aswell that its the mind control that is probably the hardest part to get over (especially when you have been a "the glass is half empty" kind of person for 21 years ) having this sudden positive outlook is extremely hard..

Catsmokinpot

Originally posted by hacktavist
This isnt true, the cost of heroin is alot higher than the cost of e (mdma).
The dealers/chemist's would make more money selling it as heroin rather than sell it cheaper as e.
It sounds like you took a snowball (dob) maybe? there quite trippy apparently.

the heroine thing was told to me by a friend of mine who tried it inadvertantly at a house party he got it in a joint he didnt know what was in it, that same friend of mine had an experience with speckled doves and mitsubishi's with brown specks in them the effects were very weak but like heroin

snowballs are clear looking with no markings or speckles and rounded edges. so no he didnt have one if you had one you'dd definitely know about it

Originally posted by hacktavist

Also lsd is out of your system in 72 hours and it doesnt replace any "brain chemicals"
MDMA is out after 3-5 days. [/B]

the effects of lsd can stay with you for life in the form of flashbacks, i shouldnt have said replaced i should have said changed brain chemicals, your brain is full of chemicals and when your nerves fire its an electro chemical reaction, they do change the chemicals in your brain making the nerves fire in certain areas that are usually dormant causing auditory and visual hallucinations.

Originally posted by Sico
Be very wary about taking advice like this from random people on the internet - Catsmokinpot for example is talking an impressive load of bollocks.

There is no standardization with ecstasy pills. Just because you take one pill with a certain symbol on them, it certainly doesn't mean another one you take a few weeks later with the same symbol will be from the same batch. Hell, even pills from the same batch can have varying amounts of active ingredient in them.
Mitsubishi-branded pills are some of the most common sold. To say that mitsubishis in general are any more dangerous than other pills is ridiculous.

Ketamine does not, as far as I'm aware, lead to flashbacks. Neither does MDMA.

The problem with illegal drugs in general is the fact that you don't always know what you're taking - the 'bad pill' you took may well have had more of some other drug than MDMA - 2CB, Ketamine and DXM are popular 'filler' substances for E pills. Some of these drugs can cause a hallucinatory state which can be unpleasant if you're not expecting it or used to it.

The bottom line, however, is that everyone is different. You seem to have suffered a particularly extreme case of flashbacks - maybe someone with similar experiences can give you better advice. Until then, do some research yourself and be careful about taking advice from faceless bulletin-board posters (yes, I realize the irony of this statement).

impressive load of bollocks eh? thanks for that.

indeed you are right you nor i have any idea from looking at a pill whats in it but some brands that come around often are usually from the same batch and you can tell from that how strong they are by asking people who have tried em. anytime anyone i know has had a mitsubishi they have the head blown off em.

doing research on a topic on the internet is extremely hard to do because of the impressive load of bollocks that people talk all the time and conflicting statements that people make. i would rather speak to someone who has actually experienced it rather than someone who has no first hand experience whatsoever

i have actually tried the drug i know what the effects are first hand i have freaked out on the drug twice and i have had the feeling which you call a "flashback" you dont really see anything so we can take hallucinations out of the equation

i thought before he could have taken lsd but he explained it wasnt i asked about speckles cause they could be anything and also some ppl were crushing up snowballs and cutting them with normal pills to get rid of what they had left

its more of a bad feeling you get than anything else hard to explain really youll eventually get over it

Emboss

The whole spekle dove crap is a myth A MYTH
it's not heroin....what a pointless drug to mix with mdma.....
people have bad expiriences all the time....
9 times out of 10 it's not the drug it's the person and there state of mind at the time of take the drugs.

back on topic I took acid/mushrooms for years crazy amounts of the stuff...
Yeh the odd time I get what feels like a flashback but then again it feels like deja vu of a time when i was on drugs last only a few seconds...

Catsmokinpot all i can say to you is

http://members.boards.ie/echomadman/whatthehell.jpg

Catsmokinpot

Emboss all i can say to you is....

http://members.boards.ie/echomadman/whatthehell.jpg

the "flashbacks" werent because of lsd they were because of mdma

Edit: i never said it was true i heard it off a friend who i would rely on ususally who was obviously wrong, just out of interest what are the brown specks then? anytime someone i know has tried em they get an unmerciful Kick off em

Beruthiel

lads
keep it down
I've banned enough people this week

Catsmokinpot
there will be NO name calling in this forum

Emmo

I have a friend who makes E tabs in a Dublin college lab. He has been doing this for five or six years since he started working there after graduating.

I have asked him whats the story with the speckles and the colours.

He told me himself that it depends on the enviroment that they are made. In the tablets he has made Green speckles have appeared because of rusted copper vats being used. Brown speckels from rusted or dirty implements.

I have taken these tablets that he makes, he insists on only letting us take one or two a night cause they dont have any fillers and are really strong.

It doesnt matter what a pill looks like, it's what it is made off. The only problems I have had in realtion to these pills are sleep paralysis which induces a kind of panic.

I think Cannabis users who have a prerequisite for psychological issues can be quite badly effected by its use.

Emmo

Emboss

Originally posted by Catsmokinpot
Emboss all i can say to you is....

http://members.boards.ie/echomadman/whatthehell.jpg

the "flashbacks" werent because of lsd they were because of mdma

Edit: i never said it was true i heard it off a friend who i would rely on ususally who was obviously wrong, just out of interest what are the brown specks then? anytime someone i know has tried em they get an unmerciful Kick off em

MDMA doesn't cause flashbacks it causes many things but not flashbacks...

well on paddys day we got green specks and at xmas we got red specks

i've also had orange and various other colours.....

you work it out.....

Catsmokinpot

notice how i put "flashbacks" in inverted commas?

big chief's flashbacks if you could call them that, cause i dont know what you could call them doesnt make him hallucinate its more of a feeling. ive had the same feelings after taking a pill and its not pleasant.

its really hard to explain but i know what he means

its not to do with lsd id have em after a clean pill aswell the only time i mensioned lsd was in the beginning cause he didnt specify at the start

you work it out.......

Emmo

There anxietly attacks,

They happen when your brain cant comprehend everything thats going on properly cause you are too emotional or wired from endorphins. They can only occur when your coming up on a pill or when your peaking.

BBC ran a series investigating the actuall effects which conincided with the launch of Talk to Frank

http://talktofrank.com/azofdrugs/E/Ecstasy.aspx

"Short-term effects can include anxiety, panic attacks, confused episodes, first-time epileptic fits and paranoia. Current evidence suggests that long term use can cause depression, personality change and memory loss."

"The effects take about half an hour to kick in and tend to last between 3 to 6 hours, followed by a gradual comedown"

Chief,

I would be very surprised if these attacks where directly linked to taking E but they could be anxieties caused by depression from taking a ton of E

Emmo

Catsmokinpot

Originally posted by Emmo
They happen when your brain cant comprehend everything thats going on properly cause you are too emotional or wired from endorphins

thats pretty much like it alright

Emboss

Originally posted by Catsmokinpot
notice how i put "flashbacks" in inverted commas?

big chief's flashbacks if you could call them that, cause i dont know what you could call them doesnt make him hallucinate its more of a feeling. ive had the same feelings after taking a pill and its not pleasant.

its really hard to explain but i know what he means

its not to do with lsd id have em after a clean pill aswell the only time i mensioned lsd was in the beginning cause he didnt specify at the start

you work it out.......

Well if you don't know what you could call them or what they are...

Why are you discussing the topic?

Catsmokinpot

Originally posted by Emboss
Well if you don't know what you could call them or what they are...

Why are you discussing the topic?

did i say i didnt know what they are or can you not read properly?

Beruthiel

Catsmokinpot
Emboss

I won't warn you again
B

Emboss

Originally posted by Catsmokinpot
did i say i didnt know what they are or can you not read properly?

In fact you did

"big chief's flashbacks if you could call them that, cause i dont know what you could call them "

Sorry Beruthiel just pointing it out...

Beruthiel

Originally posted by Emboss
Sorry Beruthiel just pointing it out...

I know
but I would prefer if you each just gave your own opinions on the thread topic and not bait each other
big chief can then take your comments as he pleases

Catsmokinpot

Originally posted by Emboss
In fact you did

"big chief's flashbacks if you could call them that, cause i dont know what you could call them "

Sorry Beruthiel just pointing it out...

yet again you didnt read it properly

i said i didnt know what you could call them. id didnt say i know what they were.
usually when people dont know what the name of something is they try to describe it or have you never encountered this practice?

Beruthiel im sorry but he is such a windup merchant!