Now here are the Rules from the male side

sci0x

> > >We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the
> >Rules
> > >from
> > >
> > >the male side.
> > >
> > >These are our rules:-
> > >
> > >Please note... these are all numbered "ONE" ON PURPOSE AS THEY ARE
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >ALL THE ONE GOLDEN RULE
> > >
> > >ONE. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don't
> >try to
> > >change that.
> > >
> > >
> > >ONE. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up
> >put it
> > >down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us
> >complaining about
> > >you leaving it down.
> > >
> > >
> > >ONE. Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of
> >the
> > >tides. Let it be.
> > >
> > >ONE. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think
> >of it
> > >that
> > >
> > >way.
> > >
> > >ONE. Crying is blackmail.
> > >
> > >ONE. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle
> >hints do
> > >not
> > >
> > >work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just
> >say it!
> > >
> > >ONE. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
> >question.
> > >
> > >ONE. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
> >That's
> > >what
> > >
> > >we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
> > >
> > >ONE. A headache that lasts for 7 months is a problem. See a
> >doctor.
> > >
> > >ONE. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
> >In fact,
> > >
> > >all comments become null and void after 7 days.
> > >
> > >ONE. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
> > >
> > >ONE. If something we said could be interpreted two ways, and one
> >of the
> > >ways
> > >
> > >makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
> > >
> > >ONE. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want
> >it done.
> > >
> > >Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it
> > >
> > >ONE. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
> > >commercials.
> > >
> > >ONE. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do
> >we.
> > >
> > >ONE. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default
> >settings. Peach,
> > >for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
> >have no
> > >idea what Mauve is.
> > >
> > >ONE. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
> > >
> > >ONE. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act
> >like
> > >nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth
> >the
> > >hassle.
> > >
> > >ONE. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
> >answer
> > >you
> > >
> > >don't want to hear.
> > >
> > >ONE. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
> >fine.
> > >Really.
> > >
> > >ONE. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
> >prepared to
> > >discuss such topics as Sex, Sport, or Cars.
> > >
> > >ONE. You have enough clothes.
> > >
> > >ONE. You have too many shoes.
> > >
> > >ONE. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Capt'n Midnight

If you are going to post something that has been posted N+1 times - Please tidy up the format and tell whomever sent you the email to remove the bleedin ">" 's and so forth back along the line .....

Tyrrial

If something we said could be interpreted two ways, and one
of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

i love that one... it's so true

quank

round is a shape... haha, so true ww)

Diddy Kong

If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

very good