Has anyone ever been in this position?

Typedef

You need to not get emotionally attached to the wimmen.

It's a lot like getting used to watching Start Trek and then Sky axes it, you have a prolonged feeling of loss.

Not worth it. Treat em mean, don't allow yourself to get attached to them and trade them in for a fitter/younger/richer/more rideable/more readily shaggable/less of a slapper model at the first given opportunity.

In order to ensure you don't get treated as a door mat, classical wisdom pertains to treating her as one first.

Problem solved.
Client happy.
Spooks kept in our custom made storage facility.

MF2HD

Originally posted by Hurting
It's very hard. My stomach is in bits at the moment, and I can't eat. When leaving her today as she was going to meet her boyfriend, I asked her for a hug. The look in her eyes killed me, because she looks as sad as I.
....
Does anyone think this is possible?....what do you think will happen next?

Listen mate I think you are being taken for a ride.....if she truly is as sad as you she would dump the BF and go with you...shes saying what she thinks you want to hear to try to ease you over your heart break.....she has no intentions of dumping him. You have to stop thinking of her and yourself as an "us", this is prolonging the agony for you, try to think of her in the same context as your other friends.


thats an odd thing to say there at the end, what do we think will happen next? I think you should sort yourself out next, you are your number one priority not her and her boyfriend. She's taking you on a headfcuk and you need to calm the whole situation down in your own head. And ffs eat something, she's not pining around the feckin place for you, you will do yourself serious damage. The whole pining for a lost love will only go so far when you're taken into hospital for passing out due to lack of food and drink..

sorry to rant on but jeez I hate these types of bloody girls, string along the nice guy and go on as if they almost had to put up with their boyfriends....the reality is when and if you ever see them together she will be very different believe me! rant over

AthAnRi

I can't/won't because I respect her too much as a friend, and know that I could jepardise that. She kept appologising to me, and the two of us were practically close to tears today. I sat there and told her that I will be here for her as a friend, and that I love her as a friend (which I do).

Hey Mate,

As I read this thread I could be reading my autobiography. This exact thing happened to me a few years back. And the truth of it is you have only 2 options.

1. Go for it.

or

2. Leave her behind.

Reasons, If you stay as her friend it will just grind you down and drive you to depression. You might think that it will get better but trust me it won't. It will only get worse and worse.

But please trust me you cannot be her friend it's just impossible.

The bottom line is you've gotta think of yourself. She is, and if she really loves/likes/respects you she will eventually understand.

In the words of Paul Brady

They say

"If you love sombody then set them free
If they don't come back again then it's just meant to be."

tinkerbell

She's playin games with your head - she wants to have her cake and eat it. Coming out with things like "if I wasn't with my boyfriend, you and me would be together", etc. is jus plain dumb. What kinda nonsense is that? If that was the case, she'd dump her man and get with you!

Her behaviour ain't fair on you or her boyfriend. Her current boyfriend would be hurt if he found out she was sayin stuff like that, and flirting with another man, and getting close enough to another man that ye could be makin moves on each other. At the same time, you are hurting as well because she is with another guy while playing with your head.

I reckon you tell her how you feel, and ask her what she feels. If she says the same crap again "if I wasn't with my boyfriend, blah blah", then tell her to cut the crap, stop acting flirty and be a decent girlfriend to her boyfriend.

And you will be able to get over her, jus give yourself some time and space, so she can't wreck your head. She ain't worth it - she's playing you both.

xx

Originally posted by Hurting
A girl that I've known for a few months now, am absolutely besotted with (from day one), turns around to me the other night and tells me she's attracted to me....but she has a boyfriend already (of a few years)

Sensors detecting an attention seeking little pricktease on the horizons!!
Steer clear chum. As for the age gap, there isn't one.

xx

Originally posted by Wolf
ILastly if shes happy with her boy friend then be happy for her, otherwise, there isnt a hugh amount you can do she needs to make the decsion of who to be with and thats HER decesion not yours

Bollocks to this, I just can't hold my peace anymore after reading this pants.
Wolf, don't worry, its clearly obvious that the little tart knows who she wants to be with :rolleyes: . She showed this when...

- SHE told HIM that she's attracted to him.
- SHE told HIM that she'd like to be with him if she wasn't with her boyfriend.

C'mon, just climb down from the user-friendly, middle-of-the-road, pro-woman, moral highground you're on there and read the guys initial post again. Then read what you wrote above. "Be happy for her"? "She needs to make the decision"? "Thats her decision"?
Sounds to me like she's just a two-bit little attention seeking bitch really. Wreck one guys head just because she see's he has a crush on her and is too f'ing proud to do anything about it. Then go back to her big strong boyfriend and after she has sex with him, laugh about the look on romeo's face when she let on she liked him.
Sounds like GASIT syndrome to me - Generic Attention Seeking Irish Tart syndrome.

Tommy Vercetti

it is possible to have feelings for two people without being an attention seeking ho you know....

I don't think it's right to judge this girl since (a) we don't know her and (b) she hasn't really done anything wrong, all she did was be honest. For all we know, she is hurting even more than the poster is.

All I can say is that I hope it works out best for everyone, if I was to offer advice it would inevitably involve beer, sex and no emotions, and I think we're in too deep at this stage to be thinking that way.

MF2HD

*****Sounds like GASIT syndrome to me - Generic Attention Seeking Irish Tart syndrome******

Thats it exactly xx - i like that phrase, a lot of women have a lot to answer for