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Australian Ventriloquist!

  • 15-03-2004 1:27pm
    #1
    JCDenton
    Closed Accounts Posts: 394 ✭✭


    An Australian ventriloquist is holidaying in Wales (as they do). He ambles into a village and sees a local sitting on his front porch patting a small dog. The ventriloquist decides he'll have a little fun.

    "G'day mate! Mind if I speak to your dog?" asks the ventriloquist.

    "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie."

    "Hello dog mate, how's it going?"

    "Doin' all right," says the dog. The villager looks shocked.

    The ventriloquist points. "This bloke your owner?"

    "Yep," replies the dog.

    "How does he treat you?"

    "Oh, good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play." The villager is in disbelief.

    "Mind if I talk to your horse?" asks the ventriloquist.

    "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either. I think."

    "Hey there horsey, how's it going mate?"

    "Cool," says the horse. The villager is dumbfounded.

    "Is this your owner?"

    "Yep," replies the horse.

    "How does he treat you?"

    "Pretty good, and thanks for asking by the way. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements." The villager's mouth is hanging off its hinges.

    "Mind if I talk to your sheep?" asks the ventriloquist.

    The villager looks up sharply. "Sheep? The sheep's a ****ing liar."


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