Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

My Dog Sex

  • 01-05-2004 10:29pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,190 ✭✭✭


    Everybody who has a dog calls him "Spot", or "Blackie", or "Fido". I call mine Sexton. Over the years that got shortened to "Sex". Now Sex has been very embarassing to me. When I went to city hall to renew his license, I told the clerk I wanted a license for Sex. He said he'd like one too. Then I said this is for a dog, and he said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said you don't understand, I've had Sex since I was nine years old. He said I must have been quite a kid. When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me, and when I checked into my hotel, I told the clerk I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex. He said every room was a special room for Sex. I said you don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night, and he said me too.

    One day I entered a contest, but before the contest began the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was standing there looking around, and I told him I was planning to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold tickets. I said you don't undersand, I had hopes of having Sex on TV. He called me a showoff.

    When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog, and I said your honor, I had Sex before I was married, and the judge said me too. Then I told him after I got married Sex left me, and he said me too. Last night Sex ran off again, and I spent hours looking for him. A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at four o'clock in the morning. I told him I was looking for Sex.

    My case comes up next Friday.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,770 ✭✭✭Bottle_of_Smoke


    last line especially good


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,487 ✭✭✭banquo


    hee hee funny all the way thrughe the last line is the real kicker though.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 610 ✭✭✭article6


    Heh, reminds me of that one Gift Grub sketch where Jaap Stam talks about his dog Six.

    "They ashk me what I am lookink for and I say I am lookink for Shex."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,726 ✭✭✭quank


    Hehe :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 442 ✭✭Hello Kitty


    very good:D


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,601 ✭✭✭MidnightQueen


    Hilarious shhhtufff!! :D


Advertisement