Illegal MP3 download prevention

zoro

Well, I for one am sick to death of my sister:
(a) Sharing files with her "buddies" (on MSN of all f*cking things)
and (b) Stealing all my god damn bandwidth!

So I've come up with a cunning plan
I'm gonna write to my dad from the IRMA threatening legal action if the activities don't stop!!!
He of course will be in on this so as to prevent heart attacks But I need some help with the wording ... anyone have any suggestions for this?

---

Mr. Bloggs,

Over the past six months, we have been monitoring various Internet accounts in order to prevent the illegal sharing of copyrighted digital multi-media.
During this time it has been noted that there have been an excessive amount of file transfers with digital signatures matching those of copyrighted works from this ISP account. While we do understand that files can be downloaded without the account holder’s permission and/or knowledge, the holder of the IOL Esat BT account that relates to this household can and will be held legally responsible for all illegal data transmission/reception that occurs during the term of the ISP contract.

Through various partnerships between IRMA, Esat BT, Eircom and Microsoft, we have successfully tracked down and stopped an enormous amount of illegal file sharing activities. Our current relationship with Microsoft has enabled us to receive and monitor logs of file transfers that are transmitted across their extremely popular MSN Messaging Service.

From analyzing these logs, we have deduced that a high percentage of all file transfers conducted from your ISP account is done so through Microsoft’s Instant Messaging service. There have been numerous Internet Protocol Address (IP Address) lookups performed on these transfers, and have found that an account registered to a “Janette Bloggs” – jannettebloggs@hotmail.com – has both transmitted and received a high volume of digital copyrighted content.

IRMA would like to inform you that this is your only warning. Should illegal activity continue, the next step is a legal challenge, in which we will have authority to confiscate all computer and music-copying equipment from your household. Pending a complete audit of your computer hard disk drives, any copyrighted material found on these systems that falls under the jurisdiction of IRMA will be permanently erased, and the hard drives destroyed in order to prevent any possible recovery of the copyrighted content.

However, if no copyrighted content is discovered, you will be issued a retraction, as well as all of your confiscated equipment in full working order.

As stated above, this is your only warning. Cease and desist all illegal file transfer activities immediately.

Yours sincerely,
Mr Man

Asok

My good god your evil.
You are my messiah.

Mutant_Fruit

Yours sincerely,
Mr Man

that might be a bit suspicious, they might suspect the e-mail if it comes from Mr Man

It sounds grand, very official sounding. Just make sure you don't send it from an obviously not RIAA e-mail address, such as bigjobs@hotmail.com.

Try and grab an official-ish email from some free site. Check out www.mail.com, they offer various endings onthe e-mail addresses.

zoro

hehe *edit fixed smiley*

well the mail will be snail mail - hard copied. that way i can see her shat herself in person when dad goes into her with it

koneko

OMG that's so evil.
I love it!

zoro

*curtsey*

daveyjoe

You're some selfish, bandwidth hogging bastard.
I'd love to see the look on her face though, put a scan of the letter up aswell.

Ingenious plan, hope it works out for you

zoro

Well when my UT2K4 slows to worse lag than 33.6 dialup I get a little ... frustrated So f*ck her and her bandwidth hogging activities.

I'm also setting up network shaping on my linux box to limit her to 56k dialup speeds

rymus

& take a photo of the reaction. Good old pranks

zoro

She aint gonna know it was a prank As far as she'll ever know, she's f*cked if she does it again

daveyjoe

Originally posted by zoro
I'm also setting up network shaping on my linux box to limit her to 56k dialup speeds

Absoloutely brilliant, I wish I was as evil as you. Seriously though, You must have been really pissed off to think up of all this, Well done.

zoro

You have no idea...

zoro

OK, so I need a manager's name to sign at the end of it ... what'll I use?

koneko

umm.....
Bob Curtis
David Murphy!

In if your sister hasn't seen Office Space, how bout a little nod to that classic and go with
Bill Lumbergh

(edit: wrote dad instead of sister for some reason? fixed now)

Sleepy

Simon. (a.k.a BOFH)

zoro

Don't know them - but I may go with Bill actually

Just off the phone with my dad - GAME ON!!! he's in and wants to see this through to the end!

Oh my oh my oh my today is going to be fun!

Yeah it's immature, but she simply refuses to stop it, and it's illegal, so f*ck her

RobertFoster

don't give the game away by laughing too much...like I would....:p

Emboss

just throttle her bandwith?

Mutant_Fruit

Just off the phone with my dad - GAME ON!!! he's in and wants to see this through to the end!

roflmao! Your dad is in on this too? Dear god, this would be the best ever april fools. I'm stealing this idea for april 1st 2005!

Moonbeam

Hehe

I would laugh if ur litte sister reads this!

ballooba

If I was your da I would stick your head in the blender.

You sound like a spoilt brat.

zoro

Thanks for that! It's good knowing that my stopping the spread of illegally copied mp3's is being a spoilt brat!

I'll keep that in mind the next time I help a granny cross the street, you know, I'll just leave her in the middle.

And the other point I made - by stopping the file transfers I'm also curbing her bandwidth usage, 2 birds with 1 stone eh?

mr_angry

I just hope cunning doesn't run in your family. Otherwise, she might end up seeing it through to the court case!

Mutant_Fruit

ah but its funny none the less.

What i would do (and have done) is just limit the other computers using netlimiter when i play. So much easier.

zoro

Originally posted by mr_angry
I just hope cunning doesn't run in your family. Otherwise, she might end up seeing it through to the court case!

ROFL!

zoro

Originally posted by Mutant_Fruit
ah but its funny none the less.

What i would do (and have done) is just limit the other computers using netlimiter when i play. So much easier.

Yeah that's what the traffic shaper will be for. When I'm playing, or if I'm downloading a large file I can throttle myself so that I'm not killing the web for everyone on the network

Mutant_Fruit

Originally posted by zoro
Yeah that's what the traffic shaper will be for. When I'm playing, or if I'm downloading a large file I can throttle myself so that I'm not killing the web for everyone on the network

why not just traffic shape her when you play? It'd be easier, and you woulndy need the letter then.

zoro

Ah but I've thought of it now, and I'm quite looking forward to seeing her face

RE*AC*TOR

Just out of curiosity.. how old is your sister?

I'm assuming sharing of Britney, Justin, Westlife etc etc - if so you can take the moral high-ground.

zoro

Well I actually have some Justin and Britney cd's anyway so I'd have no excuse for that

But it's her sharing of Busted tracks - over, and over, and Westlife too, plus some Boyzone I'd imagine, I'm just sick of it

Also, when I use boards.ie, I use very very little bandwith, even with sigs + avatars enabled... yet on her beloved busted forums it's like downloading a bloody divx! :dunno:

She's 16 btw

RE*AC*TOR

Originally posted by zoro
Well I actually have some Justin and Britney cd's anyway so I'd have no excuse for that

*shakes head in disgust*

you used to be cool