Ridiculous song-lyrics.

cilamc

Thought I'd start this one off, apologies if there's a thread like this already. I'm new, you see. Add rubbish song-lyrics below, maybe we can come to some kind of agreement on what actually is the most rubbish lyric put to music. A few early contenders then...

"Remember when we travelled round the world? We met lots of people, and girls." - "Tonight", New Kids On The Block, 1990

"´Cause you're a real gone kid, maybe now maybe, I'll do what I should have did" - "Real Gone Kid", Deacon Blue, 1988 (actually this may be a work of genius I can't decide...)

"I said hello you fool , I love you/ Come on join the joyride" - "Joyride", Roxette, 1991

"I'm taking my love in my hands, I'm gonna do what's good for me" - "Do What's Good For Me", 2 Unlimited, 1994

"Our love is made in the dolce vita, nobody else than you" - "Dolce Vita", Ryan Paris, 1983

"With their tanks and their bombs and their bombs and their guns in your head in your head they are fight-iiiing!" - "Zombie", The Cranberries, 1994


"The sound in my head goes round and round like a drunk on a stairs who just fell down" - "Brutal", New Order, 1998

"I know I was a crazy fool for treating you the way I did, but something got a hold of me, and I acted like a dustbin lid" - "The Other Me", Paul McCartney, 1983

"Maybe it was over when you threw me out of the Rover at full speed" - "Maybe Maybe", A-Ha, 1986

"The handshake seals the contract, from the contract there's no turning back, the turning point of a career in Korea being insincere"* - "Everything Counts", Depeche Mode, 1983

I'll add more if no-one else does!

*Note attempt at making the words "career", "Korea" and "insincere" rhyme. "Everything counts in large amounts", indeed - pah! (Still think it's a great song though!)

robbie1876

Ricky Martin - Shake Your Bon Bon
Verse 2, reproduced here for your pleasure. That Himalayas line is my fave ever.


You're a Mata Hari
I wanna know your story
In the Sahara sun
I wanna be the one
That's gonna come and take you, make you
Shake your bon-bon
Shake your bon-bon
Shake your bon-bon
Up in the Himalayas
C'mon I wanna lay ya
We'll go around the world in a day
Don't say no, no
Shake it my way, oh
Shake your bon-bon
Shake your bon-bon
Shake your bon-bon

Doctor J

Never ever overlook heavy metal from the early 80's for quality lyrics, for example:

Metallica

Sound is ripping through your ears
The deafening sound of metal nears
Your bodies waiting for his whips
The taste of leather on your lips



or the Mighty Judas Priest

Refuse to bite the mantrap
Be led to set the snare
I love to have my sight
Capped everywhere

Grinder
Looking for meat
Grinder
Wants you to eat


and Saxon

I don't take no jibe from the motorway pigs
When I'm crusin' down the freeway I don't get no lifts
If you see me coming get out of my way
You know a Trans Am didn't, I blew it away

She's got wheels, wheels of steel
She's got wheels of steel
Wheels of steel
My my my my wheels of steel

Spacedog

Brian Kennedy:

Put the message in the box,
Put the box into the car,
Drive the car around the world,
Until you get heard.

WTF? not only does it not maks sense, these lyrics have the musical rhyming of an ann and barry story *shudder*

John

A gem from last century, ladies and gentlemen, I give you The Kelly Family's An Angel:

I wish I had your pair of wings

Had them last in my dreams

I was chaising buterflies

Till the sunrise broke my eyes

Tonight the sky has glued my eyes

Cause what they see`s aa angel hive

I`ve got to touch that magic star

And greet the angels in their hive

Sometimes I wish I were an angel

Sometimes I wish I were you

And all the sweet honey from above

Pour it all over me sweet love

And while you`re flying around my head

Your honey kisses keep me fed

I wish I had your pair of wings

Just like last night in my dreams

I was lost in paradise

Wish I`d never opened my eyes

Sometimes I wish I were an angel

Sometimes I wish I were you

But there`s danger in the air

Tryin` so hard to be unfair

Danger`s in the air

Tryin`so hard to give us a scare

But were not afraid

Sometimes I wish I were an angel

Sometimes I wish I were you

Wish I were you

Oh I wish I were you

John

Actually, almost as ridiculous, this is what was printed under the lyrics for the song:

Visitors interested in The Kelly Family Lyrics may also interested in:

---

Garth Brooks Lyrics
Kelis Lyrics
Kid Rock Lyrics
Lil' Jon & the Eastside Boyz Lyrics
Live Lyrics
Motion City Soundtrack Lyrics
Shinedown Lyrics
Spice Girls Lyrics
The Distillers Lyrics
The Juliana Theory Lyrics
Toni Braxton Lyrics
112 Lyrics
Ani DiFranco Lyrics
Bush Lyrics
Dream Theater Lyrics
Fefe Dobson Lyrics
Five For Fighting Lyrics
Kenny Rogers Lyrics
Liz Phair Lyrics
Megadeth Lyrics
Mobb Deep Lyrics
Selena Lyrics
The Clash Lyrics
The Faint Lyrics
Godsmack Lyrics
Chicago Lyrics
D-12 Lyrics
Edwin McCain Lyrics
Fleetwood Mac Lyrics
Groove Coverage Lyrics
India.Arie Lyrics
Kill Hannah Lyrics
Lionel Richie Lyrics
Luther Vandross Lyrics
Morrissey Lyrics
Puddle Of Mudd Lyrics
Rage Against The Machine Lyrics
Rilo Kiley Lyrics
Shedaisy Lyrics
Sister Hazel Lyrics

Eclectic, no?

Pompey Magnus

Depeche Mode-New Life

I stand still stepping on the shady streets
And I watch that man to a stranger
You think you only know me when you turn on the light
Now the room is lit with danger

Transition to another place
So the time will pass more slowly
Your features fuse and your shadow's red
Like a film I've seen now show me

Your face is hidden and we're out of sight
And the road just leads to nowhere
The stranger in the door is the same as before
So the question answer's nowhere

Jim

Cut glass porcupine sailing on the Serpentine
Fingers on the skyline pulling down the black blinds
Terminal eyes at the edge of the night
Rivulet of dark wine moving in a straight line
Sumdging out the stop signs, running down the life lines
Terminal eyes at the edge of the night
Shadows on the ceiling, coffee cup congealing
Tarot cards revealing, a solitary feeling
Terminal eyes, but I think it's alright
Silver studded jet plane screaming through the migraine
Cutting through the cellophane, wrappers of your tired brain
Terminal eyes - put out the light
Terminal eyes
Only the lonely Arabian skies
Terminal eyes
Calling you home from your restless disguise

fragile

That damn langer song, that seems to be playing everywhere. Thats not just bad lyrics, its a bloody crime against humanity

sci0x

C-mon its not that bad!
Now sing along everyone....

Have you seen the young man
The drunken oul lout
Roaring and bawling
And spilling his stout
And in everyone's business
You'll foresee his snout
Down in Cork he'd be known as a langer

A langer...
A langer...
In Cork he'd be known as a langer

Sarky

"A Pizza Hut, a Pizza Hut, Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Pizza Hut".

sci0x

I never ever ask where do you go
I never ever ask what do you do
I never ever ask what’s in your mind
I never ever ask if you’ll be mine
Come and smile don’t be shy
Touch my bum this is life.

cilamc

"I don't want no seven stone weakling, or a boy who thinks he's a girl" - "So Macho", Sinnita, 1986

bania

I actually like this band but the lyrics to this song are just........ really bad. The song is called pretty people by Dexter Freebish.

:
I look so good when I'm driving in my car, I'm in the fast lane and I'm gonna be a star. Green light, green light, please don't turn yellow, cos if you do you know I'll step down on that pedal. You know I never have to pay for my dinner. Aww yeah you know I'm always the winner. You want me but you cannot have it. I'll slap your hand if you try to grab it ....

It improves after this, but still :eek:

Makaveli

"Lucky for my breasts they're small and humble, so you don't confuse them with mountains"

Shakira - Whenever, Wherever

Redleslie2

The Human League - Blind Youth

Dehumanisation
Is such a big word
It's been around since
Richard The Third
Dehumanisation
It's easy to say
But if you're not a hermit
You know the city's OK


:eek:

michaelpwilson

How about this classic one from the '80s by Stan Ridgway. The song was called "Camouflage" and I believe it reached No. 2 in the UK charts. There's no accounting for taste.

"And I knew there was something weird about him
'Cos when I turned around
He was pullin' a big palm tree up out of the ground
And swatting those charlies with it from here to kingdom come"

Surreal.

cilamc

"I get up in the morning, I see your face, it's looking so good, everything's in place" - "Cover Girl", New Kids On The Block, 1989

"I've used up all my tissues, cause there's more serious-er issues" - "Where Are You Baby?", Betty Boo, 1990

"This feeling inside could never deny me the right to be wrong if I choose" - "Nothing Rhymed", Gilbert O'Sullivan, 1974

"Ollie, ollie, ollie ollie ollie, ollie ollie ollie ollie ollie ollie ollie" - "Drive", REM, 1992

"Yesterday, I was half the man I used to be" - "Half The Man", Jamiroquai, 1995

"Times is great when the wheels is turning, my pockets is full of jack" - "Times Is Tough", Roger Whittaker, 1972

"Every minute of every hour, I love a sunflower", "Sowing The Seeds Of Love", Tears For Fears, 1989

"Boxes that go beep" - "System Addict", Five Star, 1985

"There is Badger Bill, little Tiger Lily too, and a whole lot more, they are Rupert's friends and they're waiting here for you, so unlock the door." - "Rupert", Jackie Lee, c1970

"Power from the needle to the basket, AM FM I feel so ecstatic now, it's music I've found and I'm wired for sound", "Wired For Sound", Cliff Richard, 1981

"Most of my friends were strangers when I met them..." - "I Quit", Bros, 1988

"On Harbour Bridge the rain was gently falling down, on a lazy summer day, your face appeared there on my windscreen, you smiled and slipped away" - "A Better Love", Londonbeat, 1990

Must thank TJ for his help here!

Pompey Magnus

Adrian Gurvitz : Classic

"Gonna write a classic,
Gonna write it in an attic,
Babe I'm an addict
An addict for your love"


Joe Dolce: Shaddup you face (Greatest music travesty ever, kept Vienna by Ultravox off No.1! :mad: )

"What'sa matta you, hey
Gotta no respect, whatta you think you do
Why you look so sad?
It's not so bad, it's a nice place
Ah, shaddap you face"

eggshapedfred

JJ72 - Dreamed In a Dream (bside)

Lend and defend all the dread, ahead
With the doubts and the shouts
Till you smile with desire

To defeat and delete then employ to destroy
And betray but always pray

Refrain:
As it seems, in a dream
In a scream
I am eloquent again
As it seems, in a dream
in a dream
You are elegant again

To drum on the lawn, shocks to the lost
For the noise of the joys
To betray and pray

-- utter pants. worst lyrics EVER

fjon

Although the first verse is the funniest, I just had to include the whole song. I think that's the last the record execs allow her to write her own lyrics...

Des'ree: "Life"

Ooh, Yeah
Oh yeah
Oh Life
Oh Life
I'm afraid of the dark
Especially when I'm in the park
When there's no one else around
Oh I get the shivers
I don't wanna see a ghost
It's the sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
I'm a superstitious girl
I'm the worst in the world
Never walk under ladders
I keep a rabbits' tail
I'll take you up on a dare
Anytime, anywhere
Name the place, I'll be there
Bungee jumping, I don't care
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life
So after all's said and done
I know I'm not the only one
Life indeed can be fun
If you really want to
Sometimes living out your dreams
Ain't as easy as it seems
You wanna fly around the world
In a beautiful balloon
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Oh life, oh life..

Mossy Monk

fragile wrote:

That damn langer song, that seems to be playing everywhere. Thats not just bad lyrics, its a bloody crime against humanity

i have never heard it, only the ringtone variation from those cursed ads on tv. it seems like i'm not missing much