Need A Push

sharkman

A loud pounding on the front door awakens a man and his wife at 3AM.
The man struggles out of bed and goes to the door, opens it, and
finds an obviously drunken stranger standing in a pouring rain.
Almost snarling because of the inconvenience, the guy says to the drunk,
"Yeah,what do you want?"
"Would you give me a push?" the drunk slurs.
"Are you crazy? Not a chance," the husband answers. "It's three
o'clock in the morning!" He slams the door and returns to bed.
"Who was it?" asked the wife, not helping the situation in the least.
"Some drunk asking for a push," he mumbles.
"Did you help him?" she asks.
Now teetering on the edge of exploding, the guy says, "NO! I
didn't help him! It's three in the morning and raining! like hell
outside."
"Well, you've got a very short memory," says his wife.
"Don't you remember when the car broke down when we were on the way to a
party and those two guys helped us?
I think you should help this poor man."
Now wide awake and knowing he'll be unable to go back to sleep, the
husband went to the front porch and stood in the driving rain. "Hey,are
you still out there?"
"Yeah," comes the answer.
"Do you still want a push?" asks the husband.
"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.
Unable to see anything or anyone in the dark, the husband asks,
"Where are you?"


"Over here--on the swing," the drunk said.

Naos

Heard before. But this was one of the funniest jokes i heard in a long time..

nice work lol (or did I see it here before??)

Diddy Kong

oldie but goodie