The Limerick Thread

Sarky

Neuro-praxis, she writes a good verse,
If bad was good, she'd be the worst,
Her last one of me
was true, shockingly,
Now all of Boards know of my curse.

Sarky

I wish I did not have to work,
And just sit with a beer and a smirk,
But I'm here in the cold,
Where forklifts are sold,
And big oily old machines lurk.

sanncoo

Poor Sarky he needed to moan
Under the stress he let out a groan
Out on the lash oh he'd be
If from work he was free
But he's needed to answer the phone

sanncoo

Sanncoo she stayed on in Clare
Cos to boards beer she just didn't dare
She watched a crap movie
that she thought might be groovy
An ended up washing her hair........

pickarooney

Pickarooney could not make it either
For beers, gins and tonics and cider
As instead of the Burren
He lives way out furren
Second left at the Zee of the Zuyder

sanncoo

Sanncoo she read all the posts
It seems there were plenty of toasts
To all and the sundry
Who regretted it Monday
The attenders had lots of boasts

The Sweeper

There once was a chap named DeVore
Who is carved into internet lore
For he started the boards
And now teeming hoardes
Are present where none were before...

pickarooney

There once was a young cocker spaniel
Who went by the name of Nathaniel
"What's the point?", you might ask
I'm not up to the task
Of rhyming with Minesajackdaniels

sanncoo

Pickarooney tries all he can
To make rhymes for every man
with minesajackdaniels
he rhymed it with spaniels
And now he has Sann as a fan

The Muppet

A Boards poster they called Pickarooney
Was considered quite a bit of A looney
He posted in rhyme
A lot of the time
Maybe he's brainwashed just like a moonie

pickarooney

Ever the optimist, Sanncoo
Each time that I draw a near blank you
Come up with a reason
To prolong limerick season
And for this I and others must thank you

pickarooney

Then out from the dark springs The Muppet
An ogrish and twisted sock puppet
In a voice cut from tin
He squeals "let's begin!"
But I'm off home from work now, so fup it

lili

pickarooney,

le maître de la rime
même les plus intimes
égal à lui même
c'est pour ça que je l'aime
et pour tout le toutim;)

sanncoo

Lili was as good as the rest
she tried & was one of the best
Despite being from France
She could follow the dance
And rhymed in the mad Cuckoos Nest

neuro-praxis

You guys are impressive!

A fun limerick thread sprang to mind
And neuro believed we might find
A poster or two
With a flare for haiku
But unlikely a limerick like-mind!

How wrong, oh how wrong was she there!
For it turns out there's talent and dare
In these poets galore
Who indeed wipe the floor
With the efforts of this cheeky mare!

amp

There was a young poster called amp,
He was as mad as a bedside lamp,
He plotted and schemed,
And in his head he dreamed,
Of shagging some bird he in fact didn't.

The years they passed on by,
He still lives with the false lie,
It will not go,
So on with the show,
And now here's the weather with pam.

There was a young transvestite called pam,
Like Bo-peep only without the lamb,
She drank and she drank,
Right into the tank,
And posted some limerick style spam

There was a young girl from Ringsend,
Who fancied intelligent men,
She flirted and smiled,
Used cunning and guile,
And got what she wanted in the end.

pickarooney

A macho young poster called Amp
Who in truth was exceedingly camp
With his frock and fake tits
He looked just the spit
Of that blonde wan from Transvision Vamp

pickarooney

With the rhymes reproducing like rabbits
This Limerick thing's now quite a habit
We should show it, I feel
To the lads in Rathkeale
But the fúckers would probably stab it

sanncoo

Why show it to those in Rathkeale
The fuppers would just laugh and Squeal
They'd look at us all
The psychiatrist they'd call
Through a straw we'd be havin our meal

lili

sanncoo, when i will have more time, i will write a limerick in french for you:)

Sarky

I can't wait for evening to fall,
To the Anno, I answer the call,
To the Galway Boards Beer,
For much drinking and cheer,
(They don't know I'll soon kill them all...)

neuro-praxis

Sarky's a normie by day,
But by night it's the opposite way,
He brandishes knives
At his friends and their wives,
And buries their corpses in hay.

koneko

neuro-praxis wrote:

Sarky's a normie by day,
But by night it's the opposite way,
He brandishes knives
At his friends and their wives,
And buries their corpses in hay.

Sig-ify it Sarky!

neuro-praxis

Koneko, in honour of your compulsion to "lock" conversations in real life:

Koneko, the $hite-talker bigot,
Was the first one in Cuckoo to twig it
That's young Sarky's poem
Was fit for a tome
So she ordered the fellow to sig it!

Sarky

I retract my previous statement,
It could mean libel and/or beratement,
My lawyer says to say
I bury no-one in hay.
(Which is true, 'cos they're all in my basement...)

lili

sanncoo,

quel est ce gracieux volatile?
aussi charmeuse que subtile
princesse du royaume des coucous
bien sûr, c'est notre amie sanncoo
reconnaissable entre mille!

The Muppet

Lili you silly French trout
That garbage coming out o your mouth
Posting in French is quite lame
As gaeilge's the same
Cause English is the language we spout.

lili

muppet,

je fais ce que je veux
ton avis m'importe peu
la langue de molière
est celle que je préfère
ne t'en déplaise, monsieur

The Muppet

Que

My french is not very Hot
But the Gist of your rhyme I have got
You appear not to care
You silly old mare
If that continues you'll have to be shot.

sanncoo

The muppet he did like to spout
the words they would just tumble out
of lilli he feared
Her rhymes he found weird
We'll just have to stitch up his mouth...


Lilli merci pour le rhyme
I thank you for taking the time
to think out in french
Those words for this wench
Though Muppet he finds it a crime

Come all ye cuckoos in the nest
We'll make this as weird as the rest
Well rhyme for the crew
On things that are blue
A pint for the one that does best