humdinger of a romatic problem

jesus smith

hi sorry i decided i wanted to erase this cos ive come to a conclusion about my problem and i dont want it up any more . I thought this place was somewhere you could come and ask people for help with a personal problem and the ever so help full moderator berthrial told me to effectivly go **** myself when i asked if they could deleate it, so sorry for wasting your time.
thanks to all who gave actual advice.

secret_squirrel

jesus smith wrote:

i know my ex is gonna have a fling minimum with her ex boyfriend

How do you know this for sure - sounds like you are looking for justification for a pre-emptive revenge shag with the new Girl.

jesus smith wrote:

now she says she's going to try get back over to me in a few months if

As what? Your GF or just as a mate. Are you completely broken up or just on a 'break'

It seems like you have pretty much made up your mind you want to get with the new bird and are hoping we will provide some justification/moral support.

So if you want my advice - if you are willing to answer for the consequences of your actions go for it. Worst that will happen is that you will get a battering from the new Birds ex, and break the heart of your ex whose currently pining for you in a foreign country.

Best case you and new Girl hook up, get married and have 15 squawling brats.....

jesus smith

jesus! man that sounded a bit poisonous?

look i kinda get the feeling that was meant to offend and start a fight but im not interested in that.
to be honest id like to keep a little privacy about the situation so im not going into details about how i know xy or z suffice to say i know what im talking about with regards her ex boyfriend as ive met him and know what hes like and her coming back.
if any one else is replying please respect that what im saying is the truth and the bare minimum of facts that i wish to share for you to help.
thanks

Nasty_Girl

I think maybe you need to step back a bit, you're just out of a relationship, she's still in one, even if she leaves yer man for you then she'll still have loads of hang ups and issues.

How do you know she's not happy with her boyfriend? Did she tell you this or is it common knowledge?

The only reason I ask is because I know of a few girls who trot out the "my boyfriend is an *sshole" excuse to justify cheating. This may not be the case at all, in some cases the person genuinely is unhappy with the relationship and it takes another person to make them realise.

It's just something to be aware of.

jesus smith

true i suppose, she told me shes not happy with the boyfriend herself.
your right though i think stepping back is a good idea, no point geting caught up in a big mess.
cheers!

jimmycrackcorm

doesn't matter if she might be perfect - you have to follow the rules - cos they're rules so no rebounds.

Rules are Rules.

signed
Bureaucracy Clerk

Civilian_Target

I'd say stick around. If she (edit: the Irish girl) really does want you, she'll break up with her current boyfriend in the next few weeks, and if you really want her, you'll wait for a few weeks, or else in that time you'll change your mind. But I wouldn't start anything until you're sure she's actually broken up with her boyfriend, otherwise you're going nowhere.

The fact is, your foreign girl is gone. The likelyhood of her coming back is low, and the likelyhood of you's getting back together if she does come back is lower still. I'm sure it'll be hard to do so, but decide to move it to the "happy memories" instead of "potential reunion" section of your head and you'll be all the better for it.

Lex Luthor

jesus smith wrote:

ok i recently broke up with a girl, we met just before xmas through a mutual friend and hit it off and became friends, we started going out round mid-march. she wasnt my dream girl but i did love her, we wer great friends and had an amazing sex life. however shes not irish and she had to move home about a two weeks ago. now she says she's going to try get back over to me in a few months if she can but i know she has an ex boyfriend over there who's cept in touch and still carries a flame for her, she says he's just a friend now but i know she still has feelings for him.
anyway thats only half the problem, a week after she left i met a girl. we got talking by accident and really hit it off, shes funny intelligent and beautifull and we really like each other, problem is shes got a boyfriend.However shes not getting on to well with him any more and she wants to break up. now normally id think i was gonna be used as a rebound but she does genuinely seem to like me a lot and we have got alot in common.
so my problem is that i dont like the idea of stealing someones girlfriend at all and i dont like the idea of meeting someone so soon after my ex left.
but on the other hand shes not happy with her boyfriend and i know my ex is gonna have a fling minimum with her ex boyfriend and im not sure she'll even come back at all.
so any help?

hey, you could be in luck, she could be the girlfriend of Unreg bit's bit on the side in this post http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2054850983 and it could all be a happy ending. Wait till after xmas, if she's been dumped, then

txt_mess

You seem to have gotten yourself in the middle of a pile up here.

First off it's really up to you on whether your distrust of your current girlfriend and her ex is strong enough to break up with her.

Second I'm not a fan of the whole cheating thing it nevers works out and people I have seen go into this type of situation always end up eventually back on their own as if a relationship starts out of crap it'll probably end up the same way.

Personally sounds like you need to wipe the slate clean take 2 weeks off from relationships and sure whats wrong with friendly hook ups why take it to the relationship stage everytime.

shakaman

Lex Luthor wrote:

hey, you could be in luck, she could be the girlfriend of Unreg bit's bit on the side in this post http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2054850983 and it could all be a happy ending. Wait till after xmas, if she's been dumped, then

Hahahah quality Lex!

Our own little soap Opera unfolding before our eyes!

secret_squirrel

jesus smith wrote:

jesus! man that sounded a bit poisonous?

What can I say? I just presented you with some cold hard facts - and some colder harder speculation. You can ignore both if you wish.

As you are doing when you say you know the foreign ex will cheat on you. This kind of 'knowing' on your part will create exactly the situation you fear. I bet you are already acting in a way that will drive her to cheat on you. If a girl you "recently broke up with" can be said to be cheating in the first place!

As I said you need to decide whether or not this new girl is worth pursuing irrespective of what the foreign ex is up to. Just dont use the Ex as an excuse for potentially breaking up another couple. That would be your decision and what your own Ex is up to (or not) should have no bearing on it.

Dont use her as an excuse to act in a way that a lot of people would consider scummy. What comes around goes around after all.....

ps thanks for editing out the twat comment :rolleyes: