Girl I fancy...

LegacyUser

Yes, I realise this another 'girl i fancy' thread but I'd like some advice/opinions on my own personal dilemma.

I work with this girl, and honestly I am mad about her. For the past few months she is the only girl I can think about, but the thing is I am not the most experienced of guys in the world and I suffer with a lack of confidence especially in this department, so I don't have the courage to directly ask her out. Firstly, I fear rejection and secondly I'll be very embarrased working with her if she says no.
I'm 18 and she's 17.
I only see her at weekends (only time she works) and every time I see her we get on great, always chatting away, but if I even initiate flirtatious behaviour she goes red and makes a quick getaway. Does this mean she's shy or is it a nice way of saying 'f*ck off you ugly c*nt'.

P.S A few months ago, she came to my Debs with me but nothing happened, but surely she must have some interest in me if she came in the first place?
And last weekend she gave me her no. but yet again, no even slight flirting by text.
How should I pursue this because I really like her, and I'd love to go out with her. thanks for your help!

Atrocity

She sounds interested, but very very shy. You'll have to make the first move, she's probably scared to do it herself.

Canis Lupus

Unreg.8888 wrote:

Yes, I realise this another 'girl i fancy' thread but I'd like some advice/opinions on my own personal dilemma.

I work with this girl, and honestly I am mad about her. For the past few months she is the only girl I can think about, but the thing is I am not the most experienced of guys in the world and I suffer with a lack of confidence especially in this department, so I don't have the courage to directly ask her out. Firstly, I fear rejection and secondly I'll be very embarrased working with her if she says no.
I'm 18 and she's 17.
I only see her at weekends (only time she works) and every time I see her we get on great, always chatting away, but if I even initiate flirtatious behaviour she goes red and makes a quick getaway. Does this mean she's shy or is it a nice way of saying 'f*ck off you ugly c*nt'.

P.S A few months ago, she came to my Debs with me but nothing happened, but surely she must have some interest in me if she came in the first place?
And last weekend she gave me her no. but yet again, no even slight flirting by text.
How should I pursue this because I really like her, and I'd love to go out with her. thanks for your help!

Ask her if she wants to go for a drink. Not a date, just a drink and if she says yes, see how it goes. If it goes well maybe leave it a bit and ask her for a meal or something like that and so on. Build up to it. Either way go with your own instincts you will know the best at the end of the day.

honru

Just ask her out casually. Not a date or anything but just meet together for a pint or a coffee. This is casual and does not set the high proportions a "date" does.

"Perhaps we could get together for a pint or two Saturday night. How about it?"

Be direct. Don't start by saying "Are you doing anything Friday?", as most people will feel embarrassed about saying "no". State the day and the activity, if she's busy that time she'll let you know. Keep suggesting alternative days if she can't make your first proposition.

Have fun.

LegacyUser

Thanks for your replies so far.
I'll see her at the weekend, so hopefully i'll pluck up the courage to say something to her. I've planned to do it for months, but its a confidence issue that stops me doing it and the longer it goes on the harder it gets. In all honesty, I think she's too good for me- drop dead gorgeous and the easiest person to talk to ever. So, I find it even harder to ask her cos I don't feel I deserve her.

p.s I don't think going for a drink will work cos she's only 17. Any other suggestions? Not the cinema though, because I actually want to talk to her

Hagar

I'm sure the girl is just shy as a previous poster suggested and more than likely is waiting for you to make the firat move. Don't sweat it, she's probably as nervous as you.

The girl is 17 and two out of three posters suggest taking her for a drink.
Whatever happened to the 18yr age limit for alcohol? This country is going to hell in a handbasket if everything has to revolve around the pub and drink. Oh yeah, you ment a 7Up, right, my mistake. :rolleyes:

Surely there must be some non-pub activity that you could bring the girl to, bowling, cinema, music whatever.

Canis Lupus

Oooops, missed the 17 year old bit. Selective reading eh? Yeah I reckon bringing her for a meal isn't the usual thing for an 18 yr old either

The moral of my post remains the same, slowly slowly catchy monkey

honru

Unreg.8888 wrote:

In all honesty, I think she's too good for me- drop dead gorgeous and the easiest person to talk to ever. So, I find it even harder to ask her cos I don't feel I deserve her.

You need to get this way of thinking out of your head. No girl is "out of your league". Think positive. Sure according to your post it seems clear that she's interested, so why wait? Go!

As for where else to take her, I suggested coffee. It must be something casual.

LegacyUser

I know I shouldn't think like that, but the fact is I do. I'll try to put it out of my head but it's harder than it sounds, trust me I've tried.

thanks so far, keep 'em coming

WhiteWashMan

Unreg.8888 wrote:

Yes, I realise this another 'girl i fancy' thread but I'd like some advice/opinions on my own personal dilemma.

I work with this girl, and honestly I am mad about her. For the past few months she is the only girl I can think about, but the thing is I am not the most experienced of guys in the world and I suffer with a lack of confidence especially in this department, so I don't have the courage to directly ask her out. Firstly, I fear rejection and secondly I'll be very embarrased working with her if she says no.
I'm 18 and she's 17.
I only see her at weekends (only time she works) and every time I see her we get on great, always chatting away, but if I even initiate flirtatious behaviour she goes red and makes a quick getaway. Does this mean she's shy or is it a nice way of saying 'f*ck off you ugly c*nt'.

P.S A few months ago, she came to my Debs with me but nothing happened, but surely she must have some interest in me if she came in the first place?
And last weekend she gave me her no. but yet again, no even slight flirting by text.
How should I pursue this because I really like her, and I'd love to go out with her. thanks for your help!

have you talked to her?

i mean, may seem like a strange idea, but it sometimes works.
wometimes.

or you could text her. i hear all the cool kids are doing it.

Stabshauptmann

was in a similar situation not too far back. Girl in work, fancied her, was gettin mixed signals.
I went down the drinks road but the answer wasnt clear. So I was overly blunt.

She turned me down, think if I may of scared her off with my bluntness but my point is:
A)It wasnt awkward working with her afterwards because I didnt let it be awkward. If she says no simply drop it
B)Where before I thought about her 24/7, within a week she was completely out of mind and I havent thought of her till reading this thread.
C)The experience actually made me more confident

Definitly worth getting it off your chest.

Morf3h

Unreg.8888 wrote:

I know I shouldn't think like that, but the fact is I do. I'll try to put it out of my head but it's harder than it sounds, trust me I've tried.

thanks so far, keep 'em coming

ice-skating!! it's great fun even if you're both a load of crap. and you can chat away to your hearts content. You could even hold her hand as a first kind of gesture.

condra

What if you ask her out and it turns out shes not interested??

IMHO, after spendng so long with her, if its not obvious that shes interested, theres a good chance she isnt.

Im sorry for being so pessimistic about this. Let us know how you get on.

LegacyUser

Regardless of whether she's interested or not, this is a situation that crops up from time to time in life, and its important that you deal with it. There is no right way, only your way. I think the suggestions so far are very good. Whatever the outcome, you will be a stronger person when you've taken the initiative.

Break a leg!