Short jokes (ideal for phones)

Maskhadov

I decided to start a thread where people ONLY post jokes that are short and ideal to send to phones.

Here's a dirty one : -

Pirate captain: Arrrrrrrrrrrrr, there be buggery aboard this ship.
There be taste o' $hit o' the first mates pr!ck.:)

zAbbo

thats crap

TerrorFirmer

Heres another one

Arrrrr, this thread is crap.

I forget the punchline.

Maskhadov

if you dont have a joke dont post.

What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk.

Maskhadov

1. Beauty salons up and down the country are worried about a drop in
turnover now that the metropolitan police are doing brazilians for
nothing.


2. The metropolitan police has also arrested a bus load of thalidomide
muslims in London yesterday, on small arms charges.

Tom Dunne

WTF?

Sorry, really don't get them.

edanto

Good idea - not mad on your jokes though. Here's one I heard the other night.

What's E.T. short for?


So he can fit in his spaceship.


The best SMS funnies are topical though, like the one this time last year;

Massive tea-towel sale, contact Mrs. Arafat

or last January...

OK and Hello have been scooped for Camilla's wedding photos by Sinn Fein. £34m as long as they get two clear shots...

TerrorFirmer

edanto wrote:

Massive tea-towel sale, contact Mrs. Arafat

now thats a good one liner

Anto and Moe

Snow White fired from Disneyland after being found, pinochio pinned beneath her, screaming 'lie you bastard, lie!"

fade2black

Which Pop Star is best to look after your internet passwords?

Kenny Log-ins.

johnnyrotten

They wont be hanging xmas decorations in Vietnam this year

They're just hanging GLITTER

Capt'n Midnight

or instead something humourous related to Snow White.

Guy goes in to a bar and asks for a Snow White's Delight,
Barman says he doesn't know that coctail
and the guy says it's -

7-up 'n' cider.

Nala

Capt'n Midnight wrote:

or instead something humourous related to Snow White.

Guy goes in to a bar and asks for a Snow White's Delight,
Barman says he doesn't know that coctail
and the guy says it's -

7up

I don't get it.

biko

Nala wrote:

I don't get it.

Snowhite's delight is seven up schwiiiing

Like, what did the dwarfs get upon seeing Snowhite the first time?
Seven Up!

biko

What does an African Elephant have for lunch?
An hour, like all the other animals!

Esel

Get it right. It's 7-up 'n' cider.

Capt'n Midnight

esel wrote:

Get it right. It's 7-up 'n' cider.

Thanks that's much better.

Necronomicon

If somebody texted me some of these jokes I'd find them, and kill them