What will I do with my life? -- please read

LegacyUser

[warning: this is kind of long]


Hey guys,

I'm a little all over the place lately... I'm starting to feel like I'm wasting my life! I'm 17 (18 in a month), and I'm in my first year in college, studying computer science and history. But the thing is, I don't want to study computers or history... I don't want to be in college, full stop! I'm just not enjoying it, I don't know anybody, and college seems to be geared towards exams, just like the leaving cert. So I find myself in a situation where I'm gonna have exams after every semester (every 3 or 4 months) and I'm gonna have to be doing assignments and everything in between.

I just feel like I'm wasting my time being here... I'll come out with a qualification, but other than that, nothing! I don't particularly want to do anything computer-related, the only thing I might do is web-design -- I could build a few websites if I get good ideas -- but we don't actually do that in college! I already know it and can keep teaching myself from books/internet if I need it. I'm also interested in maybe starting some sort of business... I get the odd idea for a product or something, but it's already been done; but I'm only young, I'm sure in the future I'll get more ideas. Another thing I'd be more likely to do is join the police or fire brigade, or army, or anything like that! I want my life to be more exciting than building computer programs, or working in the civil service. As far as I know, none of that needs a college degree.

I'm not entirely sure what I want to do with my life (career-wise), those are just ideas. But what I want to do is travel. I want to quit college, get a job here, work for maybe a year until I have enough money to move abroad, to Australia or somewhere, and have enough to support myself until I'm able to get a job there. That's what I want to do! And then maybe move somewhere else and live there for a while... I don't want to stay in Ireland -- that's for certain.

But there's a few problems... For one, I think I'm too young to do anything. When you think of people backpacking around Oz or somewhere, it's generally 20-somethings at least. I'm only turning 18 -- am I too young for this? I mean, if I go to America, I won't even be able to drink! (i.e. I'm still considered a kid)

Also, I have acne... It's not terribly bad, my face and everything is clear, it's mainly my back. But it prohibits me from doing things... I mean, I'm dying to go camping somewhere, but it's painful to sleep in my own bed, let alone on the ground somewhere! And I'd like to take up climbing, but if I put any pressure on my back, it's terribly pain. I'd also like to be able to swim a bit... but it's a bit embaressing. I don't know how long it'll take to clear up properly, but it should be gone within maybe 6 months (I'm on Roaccutane over a year and a half at this stage), so I was thinking of spending the year in college and if it's clear at the end of the year, I could go live my life. I know everyone seems to enjoy college, but I'm not at the moment, and the way the course is structured, it doesn't look like I will be. I like to learn, but I can learn more about American history reading a book, and I wouldn't have an exam in it.

One last thing... my mother. Basically she's got my life picked out for me, and it feels impossible to get out of it! She's been asking me for years now, what kind of frame I want my graduation picture to have. She wants me behind a desk, somewhere safe (I'm not allowed become a garda), earning lots of money... cos that's what happiness is about. I know, talk to her about it... but she's not exactly the most rational of people. I'm thinking about talking to my dad about this, though.

I can't stand it here in Ireland, and I want to escape.

So basically, I've got all of these big plans for my life, although they're sketchy at best, but there's some things tying me down... and I don't know what to do... I could be unhappy for the next 4 years and then go do what I want. The degrees might help me (would they, do you think? I don't want any specialised job until I'm finished travelling, etc.), but is it worth 4 years to do it? I also know that I may want the qualifications at a later stage in my life, and then I'd have to pay for it... but is that a big deal? If I need it, I'll get it, if I don't, I won't. Getting the degrees now would be good insurance, but at what cost?

Anyways, I could be unhappy for 4 years and then do what I want. Or I might start enjoying college and have 4 years of fun, then go do what I want. Or I could drop out now, do what I want... and take my chances.

Has anyone got any comments or advise? I'd appreciate it aLOT, this has been driving me mad for a few weeks now

Thanks guys

[sorry for the length]