drinking alone,what do you think of it?

iamlegend

hi
long story short,had a falling out with a friend and now we don't speak to eachother.sick of being stuck in on the weekends.so....what do you think of people who drink alone,if you saw someone at the bar by themselves all night would you think of them as a loser?would you do it?and can you suggest anywhere where it might be less obvious and easy to meet someone.i was thinking somewhere with live music.thanks!

the Guru

Dont worry about it a very high % of people drink on there own , if you are drinking during the day or in work its an issue, I myself had a bottle of wine watching a movie lastnight my GF was on call otherwise she would have joined me.

So my answer is ITS FINE, if you are stuck for company they're are Boards nights out go to one of these events and meet other users

memphis

I do it quite often. Its no big deal. I'm usually get talking to folks I know anyway, so again no big deal!!!

Tusky

Not mad on it myself. Drinking is a very social thing for me and I wouldnt enjoy the feeling of being drunk on my own. In regard to people looking down on you if youre at the bar on your own...I dont think anyone would even notice.

iamlegend

thanks for the advice.
however it is one thing to be at home while your girl is at work and another
to be drinking in the pub by yourself on a saturday night(cue violin).
maybe i just care to much what other people think.thanks again.

Atrocity

I coudn't go to a pub on my own , but I love drinking on my own at home

Crucifix

As long as you're not smashed off your face talking crap to anyone who'll glance your way. In a place with live music it probably wouldn't seem weird at all.

Placebo

im sure you have more than 1 friend ?
You can go to club on your own, not a pub though... too boring ?

iamlegend

no i don't they dwindled away over the years.they moved away,met other people and lost contact.those where the ones i knew since i was young,which
i think is quite common to loose touch with those people.anyway the last one
and i where always the closest and i guess you just take it for granted at my age(24),that these peolpe will always be there.anyway..a club?i thought to be seen there on your own is worse?

JustCoz

I think it's fine to do this. Why shouldn't you do things on your own? Sometimes I just do things on my own because I want to be on my own, not because I don't have friends, and anyone who would judge you for that isn't worth knowing imo!

Laguna

There's nothing wrong with going to a bar for a drink on your own, it's the people who think it's weird who are the ones who obviously need a social crutch (big group of people) to go out. I personally wouldn't go to a nightclub on my own, then again, I hate nightclubs and wouldn't go even with a group of people.

Mr.Nice Guy

I don't see a problem in going to a pub on your own if something is going on. For example, a football match or a band playing. Grab a seat near the bar and you can strike up conversations with other people sitting near you. You could comment on the game or the band playing...

Atrocity

they dwindled away over the years.they moved away,met other people and lost contact

tell me about it, it happens so easily

Red Alert

nothing really wrong it as long as it's not every night by yourself and not keeping in touch with anyone.

Oriel

I drink by myself all the time. Mainly a bottle of wine watching an film, or a pack of Miller bottles in the evening while messing about on Photoshop or something like that.
It can lead to drinking too much, like myself, so you have to be careful and watch how much you really drink in a week.
In a pub, I wouldn't really drink by myself. I definately wouldn't head out on a Saturday night by myself, but I've gone into a cozy pub about 3/4pm an had quiet one.

S.

Ron DMC

I'm doing it right now, but in fairness that's cos the others just left for the off-licence.
Don't see anything wrong with it in any case.

Rozie

I don't see the point in it. Drinking is a social think. Though you shouldn't have to drink to hang out in a pub, either. I don't a lot of the time.

eoge

iamlegend wrote:

no i don't they dwindled away over the years.they moved away,met other people and lost contact.those where the ones i knew since i was young,which
i think is quite common to loose touch with those people.anyway the last one
and i where always the closest and i guess you just take it for granted at my age(24),that these peolpe will always be there.anyway..a club?i thought to be seen there on your own is worse?

There is nothing wrong with having a pint at the bar on your own, but do not let this be the highlight of your social life. It could lead to a certain depedancy on it, which would not be healthy.

You should join a club or organisation of some sort. Does not need to be a sporting club. Could be a group like St. Vincent de Paul helping people out once a week or some other group doing soup runs in town, for example. Anything that will have you meeting new people. You'll make new friends this way. Pick something you're interested in and in no time you'll have made a friend or two you can meet up with for a few drinks.

Untill then, do not feel bad about going for a couple of pints in a cosy bar by yourself. I think it can be quite nice. Just make sure you're being proactive about meeting others.

Oriel

Rozie wrote:

Drinking is a social think.

I presume you meant "thing". If so, then that is total crap. Why can you only drink in groups? It is a drink, in the end, not a team sport or anything.

S.

Laguna

sinecurea wrote:

I presume you meant "thing". If so, then that is total crap. Why can you only drink in groups? It is a drink, in the end, not a team sport or anything.

S.

That's my belief too, a *truly* sociable person could go into a bar on their own have a pint and strike a conversation up with anyone, the less sociable person needs a group of established friends as a social crutch.

iamlegend

iamlegend wrote:

hi
long story short,had a falling out with a friend and now we don't speak to eachother.sick of being stuck in on the weekends.so....what do you think of people who drink alone,if you saw someone at the bar by themselves all night would you think of them as a loser?would you do it?and can you suggest anywhere where it might be less obvious and easy to meet someone.i was thinking somewhere with live music.thanks!

i can relate to what your saying. I cant get anyone to go with me to the local at times so the nights i do, i feel inferior of drinking alone. i keep thinking people are looking at me thinking "god he must be noisy or annoying that hes drinking alone" and "look at that pathetic loner".

last week i wasnt allowed into a club cos of wearing trainers (which i normally get in wearing).all my mates got in so i had to feck off to another club on my own. I hated it. couldnt enjoy yourself at that craic

starn

There nothing wrong with drinking alone. Be it in a bar or a club. Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. I dont know about drinkung at home though

Ravage1616

I don't think theres any thing wrong wityh drinking on your own! i've been in the pub on my own before but wouldn't stay there all nite but usually just waiting for friends to turn up!

Laguna

Deleted User wrote:

i keep thinking people are looking at me thinking "god he must be noisy or annoying that hes drinking alone" and "look at that pathetic loner".

That stems from your own insecurity though, even if people WERE thinking that they'd be the sad ****ers for thinking it anyway, people who don't have the confidence in themselves to go out for a drink on their own.

JohnK

I've no problem drinking alone and dont see any reason why anyone should.

Oriel

Laguna wrote:

That's my belief too, a *truly* sociable person could go into a bar on their own have a pint and strike a conversation up with anyone, the less sociable person needs a group of established friends as a social crutch.

Exactly. If you call yourself a "social" drinker, does that mean that you have to drink to make being with those people interesting or bearable? At the end of a day it's a relaxing drug, which also allows you to get creative. But take too much and that creative line drops dramatically.

S.

Executive Steve

i have four rules when it comes to drinking :::

never drink alone

never drink before six

never drink spirits

never break more than one of these rules at a time.


---> so drinking beer or wine after six pm is perfectly acceptable imo.

[i actually thought this thread was going to be about whether it was "ok" to drink alone - i don't like the idea of getting drunk by my lonesome to be honest... a quiet pint in a pub with a crossword fair enough, but a bottle of whiskey is obviously a no no... i think drinking regularly by yourself to the extent that you get drunk is a dangerous and corrupting habit to get into... i gave out stink to my girlfriend when we met for doing that - nowadays we drink together - a problem shared is a problem halved (i am aware of how silly this sounds don't worry!)]

anyway, as has been said, the REAL issue here is your dismay at your lack of social connections and close friendships etc... i suggest you would do well to focus your efforts to remedy this rather than to aginise about whether you were going to be seen as a freak for sitting in a pub or club by yourself. personally i go out by myself a fair bit - my girlfriend works most saturdays, and is in part time college at weekends too so i tend to end up going out to a club or a pub by myself, most times i don't even bother ringing a few mates, i know that wherever i go im likely to bump into some people anyway so i save myself the hassle and the effort of having to ring arond and organise a night out by just jumping in at the deep end and going where my feet take me... enjoyable!

social clubs, sports clubs, volunteer organisations etc are a godsend for people in situations like you... go make use of them!

starn

I've gotta say that those four rule are codswallop. I've meet anomg others The Late great Richard Harris, Seamus Heaney and Peter O Toole drinking in the day before six on there own. There is nothing wrong with drinking on your own during the day. Bring a book with you to read. I reccommend Dylan Thomas\ Byron\ Tyneeson or John Milton. The more you drink the mre sence they make

patzer117

I think the real question is why you are drinking on your own. If you intend to go to the pub and have a bit of social banter with the locals that's fine, but if you are drinking for the sake of drinking, or to drown your sorrows, well then alone is a very bad way to be doing it. I'm of the opinion that drinking on your own while not doing anything else ain't right. I don't think many people are with me on that one though

ruprect

Atrocity wrote:

I coudn't go to a pub on my own , but I love drinking on my own at home

same here.

Agent Smith

I know in the states people drink in bars by themselfes, personally i couldn't do that, i'd feel like a sad bastard.

The Corinthian

I’ll happily drink a beer or a glass of wine with a meal. Or the odd time I’ll have a drink on my own in a pub or nightclub. Of course I mean a drink. Not eight.

Irish culture is very much centred on social drinking. Pubs are called pubs because they’re public houses places where the public may take shelter, meet or socialize. Take the social aspect away and keep the drinking and you’re simply left with a vice, and as with any vice it’s fine in moderation, but anything more is an addiction.

So having a drink on your own is fine. Having many drinks on your own is not.

starn wrote:

The more you drink the mre sence they make

Ironic.

krd

drinking by yourself is fine. Anyway People can be real distraction when your trying to blot out those festering thoughts of pain, rage, fear and betrayal with alcohol.

Go on and be that lonesome pub lunatic -- perpetually on the verge of murder,,,, you know you want it.

CiaranC

Tusky wrote:

Drinking is a very social thing for me and I wouldnt enjoy the feeling of being drunk on my own.

Who said anything about getting drunk?

[Jackass]

It's always been a bit of a mystery to me why there is a stigma (in this country anyway, not sure about anywhere else) of doing things on your own! Are we all so insecure we need the approval or even permission of our piers to be accepted? And can something like this be so black and white?

I've drank alone before, i've got drunk alone before too ... never really at home, but if i would go to the local to watch a match, i may get very comfortable on that couch...a few pints turns into a lot and naturally enough you get talking to people around you also. It's not like people who would drink alone would sit in a dark corner, rocking back and forth, shunning the world...it's socialising without the safety net of a group of friends to back you up...but it's still socialising..

I think there are a lot of people though who would think it's weird or pathetic or whatever to see someone drinking alone in town or something on a saturday night...i don't, each to there own I say, who am i to judge?

Besides, im not the type of guy who has massive groups of mates all jammed into a pub..those days of big groups of school mates or college mates packed into a pub are gone since people are working and doing other stuff, I don't know how anyone would have the time to maintain more than a handful of close friendships (i.e. people you would reguarly hangout with), and i guess the rest drift into the acquaintance category...it's always great to see them, but rarely pre-organised!

So i'm not always afforded the luxury of having friends available to hang out...so i'd be more than happy to hang out on my own, and even meet new people while I'm at it! Personally i don't see anything wrong with that, im not ashamed of it or insecure about it, and I would infact encourage it!

Just as long as you don't begin to depend on alcohol of course, or drink to get drunk instead of as part of enjoying yourself and socialising!

daiixi

[cm]tyranny wrote:

i have four rules when it comes to drinking :::

never drink alone

never drink before six

never drink spirits

never break more than one of these rules at a time.

gosh.. I have no problem drinking alone (but I'm a backpacker and tend to travel on my own so have gotten used to going out and eating/drinking on my own when I havent met anyone I want to hang out with).. it's okay to drink after 11am (unless you're still drinking from the night before) and spirits rock!

So yea, head out, have a drink or two, chat to some people. Find a hobby and meet some people that way or have a few drinks in at home, it's cheaper! But you need to meet some new people or you'll go batty.

Binomate

iamlegend wrote:

hi
long story short,had a falling out with a friend and now we don't speak to eachother.sick of being stuck in on the weekends.so....what do you think of people who drink alone,if you saw someone at the bar by themselves all night would you think of them as a loser?would you do it?and can you suggest anywhere where it might be less obvious and easy to meet someone.i was thinking somewhere with live music.thanks!

Drinking on your own is great. I recommend it.