I can't buy my happiness

LegacyUser

I've recently being trying to come to terms with a something that has been eating away at me for a couple of years now. I'm very rarely content or happy with my life. I try to buy my own happiness by buying nice things for myself like the latest gadgets, computer games and even motorbikes.

I get a buzz from actually buying the items and then there is a sudden drop and I feel empty.

I just recently coped on to what I was doing and I really don't know where to go now.

Heyes

Happiness wrote:

I've recently being trying to come to terms with a something that has been eating away at me for a couple of years now. I'm very rarely content or happy with my life. I try to buy my own happiness by buying nice things for myself like the latest gadgets, computer games and even motorbikes.

I get a buzz from actually buying the items and then there is a sudden drop and I feel empty.

I just recently coped on to what I was doing and I really don't know where to go now.

Do you mind me asking how old you are ? and whats going on in your life..be it are you in college or working etc...

Victor

There nothing wrong with buying yourself individual moments of happiness - I go for chocolate myself. Theres nothing wrong with just a little frivolity in the day / week. However, as I think you realise that money alone can't buy you happiness.

I think a few things that might help would be
(a) to get involved in more people orientated things, whether socially or charitably or whatever and
(b) go seek something that you can call an achievement, climb a mountain (wait for better weather ), make something, seek soemthing new.
(c) if you need someone to talk to, then go find someone. Whether its being nice and saying "hi" to the postman in the morning or having a chat with your GP, make a start.

Airblazer

Happiness wrote:

I've recently being trying to come to terms with a something that has been eating away at me for a couple of years now. I'm very rarely content or happy with my life. I try to buy my own happiness by buying nice things for myself like the latest gadgets, computer games and even motorbikes.

I get a buzz from actually buying the items and then there is a sudden drop and I feel empty.

I just recently coped on to what I was doing and I really don't know where to go now.

#

you need to decide what does life mean to you?
What do u want from life? Do u want a good job? wife/kids/family life? or do u want to use your life to help people etc..
only you know what you want from life and only you can achieve it if you put your mind to it

LegacyUser

Heyes wrote:

Do you mind me asking how old you are ? and whats going on in your life..be it are you in college or working etc...

I'm 26, working , good salary

Pixie4

It is a cliche I guess but money can't buy you happiness....its just a false high for a short time followed by a big low. You said that you have felt like this for a while but are you just compensating for some other problem/worry that is ongoing? If you are unhappy, you can usually trace the cause back to some source. Just a suggestion...I'm no expert.

daiixi

How's your life outside of work (and even in work?).. Do you have supportive family, friends?

Laguna

I think a lot of people are in the same situation OP, I myself buy crap to think it'll fill a hole of boredom in my life or whatever, it rarely does. The purchase of material goods is never a permanent solution for general happiness, try and pinpoint the stem of your discontent.. is it your job?, your partner/girlfriend?, being single?, where you're living?.. if it's one or more of the above, try to then ascertain what you could do to fix it..

Don't like your job? - Be on the lookout for another

Partner/girlfriend trouble? - Talk to your gf/partner to try and work out issues that may be bothering you, in extreme cases, end the relationship if it makes you that unhappy.

Single? - Try to meet more people, mingle, take up a cookery class (cheesey I know, but hey..), do a nightcourse, ask friends to introduce you to girls/blind dates.

Where you're living? - Move/Holiday/Emigrate


That's all I can really suggest to you as to be honest, I feel exactly the same as you do, I'm not able to pinpoint my discontent therefore I'm unable to come to a solution...

elexes

give me money ill keep you entertained .


seriously tho you could just go do things instead of buying things . meet people see places get experiences . go skiing . its the perfect time of year

[Jackass]

You're depressed. If you can't extract happiness from all the things you surround yourself with, maybe even the things you do when you go out, or even the people you surround yourself with. Sounds pretty much text book (mild) depression to me.

You could take pills, you could see a shrink or you could just try to clear your head, try and figure out the root of it, what is it that takes away from your enjoyment of life, and then sort it.

Nevyn

DubGuy you are not a medical professional and can not make that call this is not a medical board.

Happiness you need to find your happiness again.
What fills you up inside and lasts unlike buying stuff ?
Make a list of all the things you mean to do and never get arround to,
the gym, books you mean to read, hobbies/sports you used to do
places you were once and want to go again or have dreamt of going to.

Stop buying stuff for the sake of it and open a dream account and put some money in that to make some of your dreams and abitions come true.

There are smaller changes you can make as well, do things arround the house you have been putting off,
from scrubing the kitchen press doors to sorting out the stuff you have shoved under the bed.
These things will give you a better sense of accomplishment and a longer satisfaction then buying 'stuff'.

Why not take a look at doing com volunteering some where once a week ?

[Jackass]

Thaedydal wrote:

DubGuy you are not a medical professional and can not make that call this is not a medical board.

Don't worry, im not going to give him a perscrition or anything, just suggestiong he may consider professional help....

Dizzyblabla

Do something nice for someone else!
seeing that you've made someone else happy can give far more satisfaction than trying to make yourself happy..
well, I think so anyway!

Laguna

Dizzyblabla wrote:

Do something nice for someone else!
seeing that you've made someone else happy can give far more satisfaction than trying to make yourself happy..
well, I think so anyway!

Yeah, I tend to agree... but IMO this guy sounds depressed, he needs to help himself first.

deisemum

Dizzyblabla wrote:

Do something nice for someone else!
seeing that you've made someone else happy can give far more satisfaction than trying to make yourself happy..
well, I think so anyway!

I agree with this, as the saying goes Play if forward, do something nice for someone else especially if it's unexpected but appreciated is a nice feeling. I don't know about you being depressed but I sometimes think it's easy enough to sail through life neither happy nor sad without any challenge and often not even knowing what you want. Perhaps setting goals some small some bigger are something to work towards and as you fulfil each one you get a sense of achievement.

There are so many charities, organisations that are having difficulty getting volunteers, even sports clubs look for volunteers to help with coaching. Might be worth considering

ando

your being very vague on your background but I can only suggest you try get balance in your life. Check out google for the things you need for a balanced lifestyle. The more balanced, the happier you will be

Slutmonkey57b

Rent a copy of Fight Club and sit in the dark thinking about it afterwards.




No Thaed, that's not a frivolous answer please don't ban me.

Nevyn

I do get the reference it is about changing your life and the power of choices.

Binomate

Keep spending. I buy happyness all the time. If I'm not making myself happy by buying for myself then I'm making myself happy buying for someone else. Money does buy happyness as far as I'm concerned.