Anger Management tips

LegacyUser

Help!!!

There is a person who has behaved in a very strange, rude way to me recently. This is no fault of my own - it really was a random attack and a reflection of the person's insecurities from as far as I can make out. (I'm not going into details here so you'll have to take my word for it - they've been going through a hard time recently)

Normally, I'd try to stay a million miles away from such a person as I hate strife and they keep making oh so subtle bitchy comments at me whenever possible. Unfortunately, I can't avoid them completely and I don't think they're going to apologise as I think is the right thing to do because they're at a confused stage in their minds atm. (I would feel sorry for them but they're just so bitchy - it's impossible)

I'm not raging all the time but I do get very angry inside whenever I see them. I don't show this anger because that would just cause more hassle and it does fade away pretty soon but I don't like experiencing anger at all. So, how does one get over a person acting like an asshole and not apologising? Any one got anger management tips?

Ta!

elexes

sounds to me like your doing a good job of it .

dudara

Keeping the "stiff upper lip" in such situations is the right thing to do. However, what you're left with are your own feelings on the situation. How do you cope with them?

Personally, I find physical exertation to be the best thing. I do Taekwon Do and a heavy session punching air shields is great to work out all your fustrations. Even a hard walk can achieve this

Laguna

Ignore them, obviously you may have to deal with them on a functional basis as I take it from your post you work with the person. It's unacceptable on your behalf to take the emotional brunt of someone elses insecurities, I myself would have to challenge this person - telling them how out of line they were unloading on me; I'm no punchbag. It's up to yourself if you would wish to approach the situation in the same way I would. Stand up for yourself!.:o

Sir Oxman

In the same boat myself, best thing is to ignore (tho in my case, supposedly good mate has owed me cash for ages and just plainly won't give it back - this gets to me though many friends have said to write it off...probably the best thing to do actually)

So, OP - ignore the bitchiness and let them stew.

Savman

Smack 'em in the chops, that'll fix ya:D

Gordon

Savman wrote:

Smack 'em in the chops, that'll fix ya:D

banned

OMcGovern

2006tomorrow wrote:

they keep making oh so subtle bitchy comments at me whenever possible.

Next time, ask them nicely to explain what they mean by the comment.
They'll either
a) back down and say "they were only joking" or
b) it may bring their issues to the surface

regards,
Owen

Zillah

Gordon wrote:

banned

How delightfully uncompromising... :P


To the OP, if you really have to end up spending time with this person (let me guess, female co worker who got dumped?) then perhaps you could try reaching out. If she (im gonna go with "she", "they" is just annoying) has a reason to be upset, as opposed to being an evil whore, then its quite possible that all she needs is a friend.

So, talk to her, say she seems upset and its coming across as hostility and you'd like to sort things out, rather than keep banging heads.

Now, if you ARE going to go with this approach you really really need to try to forgive her for whatever it was she did, because the whole "you seem upset" angle will come across as "I hate you, you cow" if it looks like you're fishing for an apology.