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Life as a hen.....

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  • 31-01-2006 9:23am
    #1
    Chopperdog
    Closed Accounts Posts: 397 ✭✭


    Brian came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking of drink,
    as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife
    who was already
    asleep.
    He gave a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.
    When he awoke he found a strange man standing at
    the end of his bed
    wearing a long flowing white robe. "Who the hell
    are you?" Demanded
    Brian, "and what are you doing in my bedroom?".
    The mysterious Man answered "This isn't your
    bedroom and I'm St Peter".
    Brian was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't
    be, I have so much to
    live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family....
    you've got to send me
    back straight away".
    St Peter replied "Yes you can be reincarnated but
    there is a catch. We
    can only send you back as a dog or a hen." Brian
    was devastated, but
    knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he
    asked to be sent
    back as a hen. A flash of light later he was
    covered in feathers and
    clucking around pecking the ground. "This ain't so
    bad" he thought until
    he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him.
    The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So
    you're the new hen, how
    are you enjoying your first day here?"
    It's not so bad" replies Brian, "but I have this
    strange feeling inside
    like I'm about to explode".
    You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't
    tell me you've never
    laid an egg before".
    Never" replies Brian
    Well just relax and let it happen"
    And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds
    later, an egg pops
    put from under his tail. An immense feeling of
    relief swept over him and
    his emotions got the better of him as he
    experienced motherhood for the
    first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was
    overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as
    a hen was the best
    thing that ever happened to him... ever!!!
    The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay
    his third egg he
    felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and
    heard his wife
    shouting "Brian, wake up you drunken b*stard,
    you're sh1tting the bed"


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