4th week in Treatment centre..Tough !

LegacyUser

Ok all, This all started from this http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2054887596
Maybe read above thread first...... This **** hurts
Been in treatment now for nearley 2 weeks..bad **** today..imagine this... You and 7 other people (also in treatment) in a room, add 2 councillors..Now bring in the families,who have been really hurt by your addiction into the room..About 50 people now. Crying,anger,distressing...In front of the whole room they asked my wife to tell everyone how my drinking had affected our family..Truth hurts ! I heard horrible stories, saw people so so raw,all because of this horrible addiction. My mother in her 80s cried and cried, My daughter (little pet) hates her daddy when he drinks..This is horrible, I am in my room now,so so upset I am actually crying on to my keyboard as I type. 2 more weeks to go...I really want to end this addiction cos at the moment life is bad. But I am glad I am here. My family are totally distraught and its my sons 3rd birthday tomorrow. His 4th will be better, he will have a sober daddy who is there for him.This is totally rambling as i am very upset,Will post tomorrow nite,maybe with more clarity..Nite x

Victor

Thnaks for the update and congrats on the good work.

Chucky the tree

Excellent to hear your still with and seem determined to succeed.

LegacyUser

Good. I ran away on day 2, good to see u still there.

Faith

Well done on getting this far! You've done the hardest part of admitting that you have a problem and you really want to fix it. That's the best way you could be. Hearing testimonials from your family no doubt hurts more than words can describe but in the future, you'll be able to use that to help you stay off the drink. I wish you the very best of luck and I greatly admire your strenght in getting this far. Keep it up

AngryBadger

Hang tough man. It's a tough station, ad the only way your little fella will see you sober on his 4th is if you stay the course. Well done, and fair dews for sticking at it this long.

stupefly

Congrats man. I'm glad your doing this while your kids are still young.
If my dad had done this before I was 18 he may still have a daughter.

Best of luck, hope you get through it. And make sure you go to AA meetings after you get out. I hear they're very important in keeping people on track.

LegacyUser

Newleaf - hang on in there mate. It is 'One day at a time' truly.

No matter how bad you feel now, it will never feel as bad as when you were at the last stage of your drinking. Keep moving forward, ploughing away and you will get there. Your sobriety is priceless to you and your family.

You are doing great

Beruthiel

when you've hit rock bottom new leaf, the only way is up.
you have you're family to do this for, and fair play to them for sticking by you, proving you can do it will help them and yourself, raw emotion is never easy to take, but it's honest and in your face.
stay strong, you are on the road to a better life.
best of luck

Blub2k4

Good luck man, you knew it wouldn't be easy and did a brave thing to get this far and had the balls to keep doing it despite how hard it is.
We're thinking about how you are a good bit at home and it's good to see you getting better and like Ruthie says from the bottom the only way is up.

endanagle

Congratulations for doing it New Leaf.

Bloody hell its not easy but I really have to say I admire people like you who are willing to first see a problem and more importantly, are willing to go the distance and get it sorted.

Well done, and keep with it.. you'll be glad you did.

Enda

Miss Fluff

Well done you. Just take the whole healing process one day a time. You're on the path to a better life for you and for those that love you. It's not going to be easy for you but you've started the process of turning your life around and being the Dad that your kids deserve. Please keep us posted on how you are doing and good luck xx

king_of_inismac

Well Done man. It's a brave step you've taken, but take solace in the fact that this is about as bad as it gets, and everyday it will get better!

All the best, everyone here's behind you!

LegacyUser

Have calmed down, I hope I am over the worst, Sat night 8.30, just had a lovely bath,spoke to my wife...she still loves me..Have ordered my Sunday Papers, Will lie down and chill...4000 tunes on my ipod, Wont think about monday till tomorrow nite...Getting there..I really appreciate all the positive posts and support I have got from "out there"...A boards member came to visit me today....Lovely...Thank you...M

LegacyUser

king_of_inismac wrote:

Well Done man. It's a brave step you've taken, but take solace in the fact that this is about as bad as it gets, and everyday it will get better!

All the best, everyone here's behind you!

Thank you...M

LegacyUser

Well...Week3. 2 more have legged it, only 5 of us left now...Over the worst, sleeping well, Eating like a pig !!. Starting to feel good about myself..and positive...Must go to AA, I actually enjoy the meetings.Family are so supportive and I am afraid I will let them down again,some day. But a day at a time and I wont drink today and thats good enough for now..Thanks all for your Genuine Support..Regards M

LegacyUser

You are doing a very fine thing, NewLeaf. And you are lucky that you have a nice family that love you.

tirl

Well done New Leaf, week 3 and you are doing fine. all positive vibes going to you

T

Beruthiel

New leaf wrote:

Well...Week3. 2 more have legged it, only 5 of us left now...Over the worst, sleeping well, Eating like a pig !!. Starting to feel good about myself..and positive...Must go to AA, I actually enjoy the meetings.

stick at those, even when you are out keep going to them, they will help to keep you on the straight and narrow

Family are so supportive and I am afraid I will let them down again,some day. But a day at a time and I wont drink today and thats good enough for now..

that's the spirit, take it one hour at a time if needs be.
would this be a good time to think about a hobby? something that takes up your time and takes effort, anything that keeps you busy and your mind occupied

kellxor.1337

I was there when you started the 1st post and we all had faith, I'm really happy your so determined and your gettin there, Your family know that this is tough for you, But they also know your not puttin yourself through this just for yourself,
I'd visit ya if ya wanted, could bring ya sumtin ya might need/want

Pm me with your number if ya want



Kellxor

Femelade

well done newleaf.
u are making a mighty achievement!!
everyone here is so proud of you and i bet your family are too.
well done and all the best.

-Femmy Xxx

LegacyUser

When I was 14, my Dad went to a rehab centre for 4 weeks. I think it was hell on earth for him and I didnt appreciate at the time what it meant or how much courage it took, probably because I was so angry at him and i guess in a way we were shielded from how though it was.

Now, my dad is my hero... as you will be to your son, it was only as I got older that I started to appreciate to huge amount of courage and guts to took to admit the problem and do something about it.

Alot of people who have not been through addiction have really no idea how hard it is to overcome it. It also takes a very special person to stand by you through thick and thin, that person for my dad was my mum, it took tremendous guts for her to stick by him no matter what. I think you realise you have this in your wife... she too is a very special person.

I really wish you all the best.... like you say, one day at a time... you'll get there. You have a depth of courage you probably have never needed before, but it's there.

LegacyUser

kellxor.1337 wrote:

I was there when you started the 1st post and we all had faith, I'm really happy your so determined and your gettin there, Your family know that this is tough for you, But they also know your not puttin yourself through this just for yourself,
I'd visit ya if ya wanted, could bring ya sumtin ya might need/want

Pm me with your number if ya want



Kellxor

Overcome by such a lovely offer to a complete stranger !! Just walked out of a session in a temper, I felt they got too personel, I will go back in a while. I do need some AA batteries.Kelloxer will pm you in a while....I expect a knock on the door any minute..calling me back....Having a ciggy...stressed out..smoking in my room..not allowed...dont care..paying 5k for this..angry...will calm down in a while and respect the rules again...The councellor who annoyed me is a smarmy little git, about 22, has not lived life yet..smell of pram off him !..See I am still angry....Little ****...suppose he is still learning...Told me I abused my children..phyically...It was either hit him or walk out....I chose the latter....gonna have another fag...need AA batteries....thats all.......M

Blub2k4

Stay strong man.

tbh

fair play man, my hats off to you - respect.

kellxor.1337

I can do AA batteries, So whereabouts is this place, And how do i get to it, I finish work at 4.50, so if i get the pm by then that'll be great, Stay strong, U did the right thing by walkin out of the room, Dont let him get you down, you know your doin the right thing,

Lookin forward to meetin
Awaiting PM


Kellxor

Beruthiel

New leaf wrote:

Overcome by such a lovely offer to a complete stranger !! Just walked out of a session in a temper, I felt they got too personel, I will go back in a while. I do need some AA batteries.Kelloxer will pm you in a while....I expect a knock on the door any minute..calling me back....Having a ciggy...stressed out..smoking in my room..not allowed...dont care..paying 5k for this..angry...will calm down in a while and respect the rules again...The councellor who annoyed me is a smarmy little git, about 22, has not lived life yet..smell of pram off him !..See I am still angry....Little ****...suppose he is still learning...Told me I abused my children..phyically...It was either hit him or walk out....I chose the latter....gonna have another fag...need AA batteries....thats all.......M

oh hell new leaf, it is indeed difficult at times to take someone half your age seriously, after all, they have not lived yet, what could they possibly know.
I sometimes look at a cop and wonder how he could be so young and in a uniform, or is that bus driver really old enough to be driving?
take a deep breath and calm down.
Ask for another councellor if you are not comfortable with him

Victor

New leaf wrote:

See I am still angry....Little ****...suppose he is still learning...Told me I abused my children..phyically...It was either hit him or walk out....I chose the latter....gonna have another fag...need AA batteries....thats all.......M

Anger will come and go, we all need to learn to manage anger.

Is there any truth to, not necessarily that you abused your children, but that you did hurt them, not deliberately?

Faith

New leaf wrote:

Just walked out of a session in a temper, I felt they got too personel, I will go back in a while.

Sometimes you need to be pushed to your very limits and then some more to really see things clearly. The counsellor is trying to get you to see how your drinking has affected your family, maybe in ways you're not entirely aware of. I think that in the future that's the very best incentive to stop you drinking again.

kellxor.1337

Wats up new leaf, I got those AA batteries anyway, but i'm finished work ina few mins and have no access to the net till the morn, I gave my number to beruthiel so if ya wanna get it she has it, I live by heuston station so i should be able to get wherever i have to go pretty quickly,

See you soon friend




Kellxor

kellxor.1337

Ok ppl, I'm here in St pats but the staff are just lookin at me wierd, They wont check to see if the person exists, I live beside heuston so i dropped in after work, Does anyone know his name or his phone number, I've brought him what he wants but they wont check for me if he's here, Need the help quickly



Kellxor

Blub2k4

I just PM'd new leaf under his regular user account. There's no way the hospital will help you unless you have his full name. Data Protection Act & confidentiality. I have his mobile number but they've taken it away from him.
Sorry I can't help anymore.

Eminem

New leaf wrote:

Ok all, This all started from this http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2054887596
Maybe read above thread first...... This **** hurts
Been in treatment now for nearley 2 weeks..bad **** today..imagine this... You and 7 other people (also in treatment) in a room, add 2 councillors..Now bring in the families,who have been really hurt by your addiction into the room..About 50 people now. Crying,anger,distressing...In front of the whole room they asked my wife to tell everyone how my drinking had affected our family..Truth hurts ! I heard horrible stories, saw people so so raw,all because of this horrible addiction. My mother in her 80s cried and cried, My daughter (little pet) hates her daddy when he drinks..This is horrible, I am in my room now,so so upset I am actually crying on to my keyboard as I type. 2 more weeks to go...I really want to end this addiction cos at the moment life is bad. But I am glad I am here. My family are totally distraught and its my sons 3rd birthday tomorrow. His 4th will be better, he will have a sober daddy who is there for him.This is totally rambling as i am very upset,Will post tomorrow nite,maybe with more clarity..Nite x

Fair play to yeah keep up the goiod work its tought but keep it up . BEST OF LUCK TO YEAH.:)

RoundyMooney

Kudos, both to the original poster, if you're reading, and to those who are rallying around to help, not just over a board, but in more practical, if no less tangible ways.

Good people are not an urban myth, thankfully

OP again, what you are going through is no doubt a very personal and invasive process, you need to be strong here, as indeed you have already shown yourself to be. Bite the bullet, I cannot even imagine how hard it must be, but persevere, for those you care about, and who care about you.

Be well.

LegacyUser

Thanks all, FAMILY DAY TOMORROW ! Dread it, More tears..... Cant write anymore, goin to bed..appreciate the support, and HEY ! Free broadband on my laptop, Gonna download a few nice tunes,lie back..and relax..PS..My wife and children still love me...they have just left...It helps..Goodnight all and again, Thank you.
PS.have sorted out the issue of poster arriving..pm sent..M

LegacyUser

Mods, Can you change title to 3rd week in treatment centre ? May as well keep up to date...Thanks....M

LegacyUser

**** this ! Sittin by the big monument thing in the pheonix park with my laptop, 3 fags,no money, I walked out. all my stuff is back there...got too heavy today. I will admit to all my wrongs,But bareface lies...NO. !! If I had my wallet with me, I would probably go to the Ashling hotel and have a drink,but I dont,so I wont....Still getting a signal on my laptop, from where, Really dont know, I think its coming from the mast at Guinness..Anyway feel cold..goin back..They will have gone by now.M

Eminem

I know its tought but hang in there stay strong . You will be fine if you hang in there

MarinoMark

Good luck with your programme,

LegacyUser

Hey NewLeaf - maybe that pimply, snotty-nosed little b*stard is trying to shock you in order to TOUGHEN you up - so that when you leave the clinic, your first, second or last response to a crisis or stress in your life is NOT to go to the pub or off-licence for a drink ? If that's his intention - maybe he is very good therapist ? Chill out !!!

LegacyUser

All quiet !! I asked for my mobile phone back...No way..Bizzarre ! There are 3 phones within 20 paces from my room, I have my laptop with superfast (free) access...I can come and go as I like,ie,leave the premises, But no mobile....Anyway, That is the least of my worries. 10 days to go,will stick it out......Roll on Tomorrow.........Nite all.

Miss Fluff

New leaf wrote:

Anyway feel cold..goin back..They will have gone by now.M

Are you back there now New Leaf?

kellxor.1337

Hew new leaf,
Wats up
I hope your back inside, I passed St pats this morning and was wondering what your doin,
Dude your through the worst of it, No point in lettin urself down now, We've all got nothin but faith in you and we all know you can do this, Proove that snotty nosed bugger you can do this



Kellxor

Blub2k4

Good man, stick with it.

mags82

Well Done new leaf for stickin with it this long i have the upmost respect for you it really can't be easy for you

ZiabR

Yeah you can do this mate. Good luck with it, your almost there.

tbh

New leaf wrote:

All quiet !! I asked for my mobile phone back...No way..Bizzarre ! There are 3 phones within 20 paces from my room, I have my laptop with superfast (free) access...I can come and go as I like,ie,leave the premises, But no mobile....Anyway, That is the least of my worries. 10 days to go,will stick it out......Roll on Tomorrow.........Nite all.

Hey New Leaf -

try to remember that these guys (the staff) have been through this process before, and you havn't, so trust them - they have your best interests at heart. Don't make it personal, cause you know they don't. Sounds like you are doing fantasticly well - take pride in that, I'm sure there is more than one person lurking on this thread who are trying to take the steps you are taking now, and you're giving them courage. nice one for that.

Blub2k4

The mobile thing makes sense, a lot of people would have their drinking buddies or drug dealers or whatever on their phones, tbh is right, dont take it personally.

LegacyUser

New leaf wrote:

**** this ! Sittin by the big monument thing in the pheonix park with my laptop, 3 fags,no money, I walked out.

Good to see you back.

When I quit treatment, I was so frightened that it took me a week to go back, but for good reasons and bad it was the right thing for me to go back.

Another time with my counsellor, she took me to a very scary place in my mind. I stood up, threw her money at her and stormed out. Now, we can go to that scary place and just let it be, no need to run away.

How’s the anger? I think you should talk openly with that counsellor and explain how you felt then and how you feel now. They need feedback, both about you and about others.

LegacyUser

Mods, plse change to 4th week etc,,,Thanks
Well what can I say.... There is light at the end of the tunnel..Tough week.but gettin better,Sleeping well, Family behind me..Now down to me,nobody else...ME ! Jesus i am very scared ! Oh and work offered me my job back..You can see now why I am scared !! Cant f*c* up again..empty promises etc..Will give it my best shot, and thanks all boarders for the terrific genuine support I have received,It means a lot..Regards M

kc66

Thats great that they gave you the job back. Its the start that you need. Its all looking up.