Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Keeping Your Insanity Healthy

Options
  • 08-03-2006 10:51am
    #1
    xzanti
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,439 Mod ✭✭✭✭


    Subject: How to keep your insanity healthy

    1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and
    point
    your hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

    2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

    3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want
    fries
    with that.

    4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN"

    5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has
    gotten
    over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

    6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling
    diamonds".

    7. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the
    prophecy"

    8. Don't use any punctuation.

    9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

    10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat with a serious
    face.

    11. Specify that your drive through order is "to go."

    12. Sing along at the opera.

    13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

    14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical
    sounds
    all day.

    15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend
    their party
    because you are not in the mood.

    16. Have your co_workers address you by your wrestling name,
    Rock
    Bottom.

    17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I WON, I WON."

    18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot
    yelling
    "Run for your lives, they're loose!"

    9. Tell your children over dinner "due to the economy, we are
    going to
    have to let one of you go."


Comments

  • Options
    #2
    popinfresh
    Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 729 ✭✭✭popinfresh


    hehe, like a few of them


  • Options
    #3
    hullaballoo
    Administrators, Entertainment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 18,727 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭hullaballoo


    I actually do number 17 quite a bit, except I do it when those machines give you out your change.

    Number 8 would make me lose the head altogether.


  • Options
    #4
    Jack Bauer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 74 ✭✭Jack Bauer


    Haha...have to try 18 sometime in Dublin Zoo!


  • Options
    #5
    biko
    Registered Users Posts: 81,220 ✭✭✭✭biko


    4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN"
    5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

    Fantastic! I must try these tomorrow.


  • Options
    #6
    Pauly26
    Registered Users Posts: 569 ✭✭✭Pauly26


    some good ones there alright


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #7
    TomTom
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 3,290 ✭✭✭TomTom


    I'd love to try the zoo one alright.


Advertisement