Stupid comments by Americans!!!!

Insect Overlord

While in Canada, two friends of mine were staying with a Chinese-Canadian family. They were chatting in the car after leaving the airport, and stopped at a junction. To make conversation while they waited for the traffic to move again, the mother of the family asked:
"So, do you guys have trees in Ireland?"

missbaker

CutzEr wrote: »

Technically, Ireland is an island actually :cool:

Maybe I should make a 'Stupid comments by the Irish!!!!'

well what was stupid was the fact that he didn't know it was an island!!
Of course I know we live on an island!!!! He thought we were off in the middle of mainland Europe somewhere. Oh and was complimented on how well we spoke English too

armchairninja

CutzEr wrote: »

Technically, Ireland is an island actually :cool:

Maybe I should make a 'Stupid comments by the Irish!!!!'

Maybe you should, it would'nt make a whole lot of difference, it would appear that a great deal of people don't know where we are anyway!:p

You mite also be better served by reading the thread, and realising that the childish retort of "maybe I should make a stupid comments by the irish" thread has been done to death, and yet we still take the piss out of the americans anyway!:rolleyes:

A_SN

Ed D. wrote: »

Har-har from an Irish-American. Nobel Prizes for Americans... most. Men on the moon for Americans... all of them. Most break-throughs in science, medicine, technology... Sour grapes... ? You win one!

Now replace "Americans" in this comment with "White men" and see how it sounds

A_SN

An File wrote: »

"So, do you guys have trees in Ireland?"

"Well of course we do, what do you think shamrocks grow from? Shamrock trees of course!!"

Babbaloo

Classic stuff, folks. Being an American, I like taking the pish out of you as well. For you Americans reading, one of the secrets for a good slag is to play on the Irish belief in American gullibility. I was in Dublin awhile back having a laugh, and this guy gets going - tyring to wind me up:

Him: Been to Ireland before?
Me: (Lying) Nope. It's my first time.
Him: Yeah? Has anyone told you about the Leprechauns?
Me: Leprechauns? No. Really??
Him: Sure, we keep a pen of them back at the family farm.
Me: Where's that? Offaly?
Him: Yeah. How'd ye know?
Me: Well 1) by your accent and 2) by the fact you believe in Leprechauns, ya thick culchie.

solas

American cousin to me: are there gay people in ireland?
Me:I think so

liah

(I'm from Canada, for the record.)

I have heard all of the following comments made in utter seriousness. I wish I hadn't.

From Americans:
"So, like, how do you get internet in your igloos? I didn't know they had electricity! Canada has come really far!" (This one definitely takes the cake. By far.)
"Do you guys ride moose?"
"Do you all like, have pet beavers?"

From the Irish:
"What's it like in Canadia?" (Heard this SO. MANY. TIMES. THERE'S NO I!)
"Do you know x from <insert random province thousands of miles away>?"
"Are polar bears a really big problem?"
"You speak really good English." (I guess since there's one minor part of the country that speaks French, we all have it as our first language?)

Dave...

I was in L.A with the wife a few years back and we got talking to 2 sisters from Pheonix. Long story short,one of the sisters said that when they were kids that she kicked the other's fanny one day. We rolled around for a few minutes before telling her that it's not quite the same where we're from. That one was'nt about stupidity as such,but it still makes me laugh.

Johnnio13

A buddy of mine worked in a bar in Clonikility - in the bar is a sign for Leprachauns crossing.
A group of yanks walk in and upon spotting the sign they ask "at what time do the leprachauns pass.
Paul pipes up and says, you missed them today, they pass at 12 everyday.

Following day all six yanks were back at the door with cameras in tow at 11.50 - Paul had to break it to them that the leprachauns
had gone by as he opened, and they didn't look happy.
The Yanks were very upset that they wouldn't get to see them. They had delayed their tour because of it - Brilliant

Also, while working as an "electrician" in NY - House owner says "why you here?" Response - "we don't have electricity in Ireland so a couple
of us were sent out by our government to learn how it works so we can wire up the villages back home.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

Compton

On Xbox live while playing COD5.

Some american guy: I went outside this morning and it was like hard snow.

English guy back to him: Its called ice you retard!!

I lol'D!

giggsy664

Great lulz saying to yanks:

[Eastern European Accent]There is saying on my country. You can put tuxedo on goat....... Is still a goat[/Eastern European Accent]

Obviously a reference to "A pig with lipstick is still a pig"

anladmór

not american but on a show about eu they interviewd a guy from barcelona and anyway they ask him ''do you feel european''

his reply ''no, by bringing european habits into our country they lower our quality of life''

found it amusing.

fatal

On seeing alot of Kerry supporters in town before an all Ireland final,one yank said to me, "It amazing that so many irish people support john kerry"

Sammag

A few weeks back whilst in Sydney at a birthday party, I met an Aussie woman and we got into a conversation – she was a Director of a large, established Advertising Agency. She commented on my accent and noted how she loves an Irish accent and in particular the Northern Irish ones. I said something along the lines that I find some NI accents very harsh and not that keen on the sound of the very strong ones, I think I made a comment about liking a Donegal one as it's a little softer, then she did a little nervous laugh and said "well anyway I mean it's all just British at the end of the day isn't it!"

An ex-boss once asked me here: 'What part of England is Ireland in?'

I've also been asked many, many a time by a serious amount of Australians I have met – who I would have classed as well spoken, well educated people: "How did you like living in the United Kingdom?"/"You'd know, you're from the U.K."/"Ireland, England - I mean they're all the same country aren't they?".

I met a school teacher via a mate and he asked me once day: "Like, Dublin, that's in Europe but it's part of London isn't it?"

It's always amazed me more-so as this ignorance is being blurted out by people who's currency features the Queen's head - aka they're part of the Commonwealth and as such should have a clearer knowledge of English history.

ahaaha

worked in a gift shop bout ten years ago. was gift wrapping some crystal for a young guy - doin the usual conversation, have you been to ireland before etc....

anyways the fool goes 'you know i'm irish',

to which i replied 'really, which part of ireland is your family from?'

then he said 'i dont know, but i have red hair. the minute i stepped off the plane in Shannon, i just knew it felt like home'.

toolbag!

ChocolateSauce

Shouldn't this be in the tragedy forum?

Senna

Used to know a fella that was a driver and guide for Brendan Tours, solely driving buses full of Americans about Ireland. He was a real character and the Americans loved him, but he used to rip the piss out of them at every chance. There is a large quarry somewhere on the way and everytime he drove by it he would make up a different storys about it; IRA training camp (if you look closely you see them), Irelands first space rocket crashed there, Americans dropped a bomb there a few weeks ago cause they though it was Iceland, Norway, France, spain, UK etc, Hitlers bunker during WW2. His stories were endless.

I remember him saying he heard one american pointing out the window saying "look at the furry pigs" while driving by some sheep. But he always rather driving americans than anyother nationality, they would follow like sheep and never give him any problems.

Local-womanizer

Had the Yanks asking for the quickest way to Ballbuffy(ballybofey):rolleyes:

When I got the ignorant ones ask for the quickest way to a place I had one reply:

Me:You walking or Driving?

Them:Eh,driving.

Me:Well then driving is the quickest way.

Pub

For the record I'm American born to Irish parents. My Mum was born in Donegal My dad in Ennis. I have been to Ireland many a times, I'm coming over this spring in fact. I get a kick out of being a real Irish American in Ireland.

It seems that everyone has a goofy American story and I am no exception.

This group of yanks walk into the pub I was in. I was hanging out with some of my Irish friends and the crowd was mostly Irish with a few people from the UK on holiday.

Now this yank apparently had seen some local school kids walking to school with there hurleys and inquired why kids were allowed to bring huge clubs to school. With out missing a beat my Irish buddy tells him those are for hurling. I swear the yank said "I'm talking about the clubs there carrying not about what happens when they drink to much. Besides there to young to drink".

I rolled my eyes and bought the bloke a drink as my friends enlightened him to what hurling was and not is.

Oh brother

Ed D.

Okay, in all fairness, I was drunk when I posted that (men on the moon stuff) and I'm halfway there now, so let me just say, I believethat is correct, but wouldn't bet on it. Never felt overly "American" till I got here and realized just how much we were the butt of the joke. (I can call my sister a slag, but if the guy on the street does, we're gonna go sort of thing.) The mean part of me does say the big boy is gonna get stones thrown at him. The real part of me just wants a hug. Anyway, got an Irish wife and two Irish daughters who set me straight all the time about how wrong I am. (Will check in in about a month, no doubt, and regret this as well. Peace till then.)

p.s. Enjoy, and either laugh or hate, till I delete it all and change my name.

Ed D.

brendansmith wrote: »

America, has quite definitely got the biggest collection of brianless morons within their country boundaries.

Quote 1: I want to have the leper-e-con
Quote 2: Lets vote for George W
Quote 3: Hi im Sarah Palin

Nuf sed!

And I'm Bertie Ahern. (Ah, leave poor Bertie alone; he's a lovely man. Like Richard Nixon, only dumb.)

jaybee747

I was in the states back in 2005 and got a couple of quotes that will stay with me for ever.

American:So where you from?
Me: Ireland
American: Oh Ireland wow,So you looking to take some of this fine weather back to London with you.
Cut the conversation short after that.

Then maybe not 10 minutes later in another shop.Same again

American:Where you guys from?
Me: Ireland
American:Wow thats cool, i come from a little place thats just like Ireland.I'd say its very similar.
Me: really where?
American:Its a little island in Hawaii called (can't recall)
Me: Nah i'd say its a little differant.

Have a good laugh at that one all the time

coconut5

Some questions I was asked:

Do all the men look like Colin Farrell?

Do you live in houses over there?

Is Ireland close to Holland?

Did you come over here to improve your English? (I tell him that we speak English in Ireland.) Yeah, but you know, your American English?

pcardin

Ed D. wrote: »

Har-har from an Irish-American. Nobel Prizes for Americans... most. Men on the moon for Americans... all of them. Most break-throughs in science, medicine, technology... Sour grapes... ? You win one!

LOL. First Nobel Prize laureates Jacobus H. van't Hoff, Wilhelm C. Röntgen, Emil A. von Behring, Rene F. A. Sully Prudhomme and Jean H. Dunant and Frédéric Passy (none of them were americans). US has taken all Nobel Prizes only in 1976 were Milton Friedman was jewish, Samuel Chao Chung Ting was chinese, D. Carleton Gajdusek was slovak, Saul Bellow was russian-jewish, Mairead Corrigan was irish. William N. Lipscomb was only native american in that year. And who is american? Mix of everything. People from around the world. And most throughs in science, medicine, technology as you declare probably was sponsored from US government but none of them was american So don't play smart here! You just showed your "american" style of thinking and incompetence.

pcardin

coconut5 wrote: »

Some questions I was asked:

Do all the men look like Colin Farrell?

Do you live in houses over there?

Is Ireland close to Holland?

Did you come over here to improve your English? (I tell him that we speak English in Ireland.) Yeah, but you know, your American English?

lol. but you know, for me as a person from non-english-speaking coutry american english sounds far way better and easier to understand than uk english.

artielange

pcardin wrote: »

Are you also american idiot? First man on the moon was Yuri Gagarin (russian), first Nobel Prize laureates Jacobus H. van't Hoff, Wilhelm C. Röntgen, Emil A. von Behring, Rene F. A. Sully Prudhomme and Jean H. Dunant and Frédéric Passy (none of them were americans). US has taken all Nobel Prizes only in 1976 were Milton Friedman was jewish, Samuel Chao Chung Ting was chinese, D. Carleton Gajdusek was slovak, Saul Bellow was russian-jewish, Mairead Corrigan was irish. William N. Lipscomb was only native american in that year. And who is american? Mix of everything. People from around the world. And most throughs in science, medicine, technology as you declare probably was sponsored from US government but none of them was american So don't play smart here! You just showed your "american" style of thinking and incompetence.[/quote




That all seems impressive but the first one is seems so wrong?

Another American quote "Stupid is stupid does" F. Gump

pcardin

That all seems impressive but the first one is seems so wrong?

Another American quote "Stupid is stupid does" F. Gump[/QUOTE]

Sorry, my mistake. Yuri Gagarin became the first human in space and the first to orbit the Earth. Neil Armstrong was the first man on the moon. My apologies.

I can give you a better quote for yourself but I'm affraid you gonna shoot me after

artielange

"I can give you a better quote for yourself but I'm affraid you gonna shoot me after "


And I would put every time I stop for directions ,all I get is " yea I know the place its just down the road a bit.":)