Irish Sayings

fobster

They use her face to put out the bonfires out in the North.

geld

xxxxx is as useless as an ashtray on a motorbike!

Geld

hiscan

im so hungry id eat the arse of a child through the rungs of a cot

Danno

She has had more mickeys in her than there are stakes in the curragh!

Lep up on the crack of dawn if it had hair on it

A load of bollixoligy

Plug

My father said this one, dosent make much sense but here goes
"Your an excuse for an abortion ba5terd" to a traveller.

milltown

I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

She had a fanny like a plumbers toolbox (could do with a trim)

If it wasn't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all.

I hope hope his ears turn into arses and **** on his shoulders.

MrSinn

Im so hungry i would eat ****e out of a babys nappy

RichJH

She's got a face that would crack a snipers lens

keano_afc

Old threads are old.

number10a

HAHA! These are brilliant!! Well done whoever dug this tread up!!

It's stuck on like shít to a blanket.

Sure he'd stick it into a beehive.

Go away and scratch your ass with a broken bottle.

Would ya go 'way and rub sh(i)t to yourself.

Yer wan would get up on her father if she had half a chance.

admiralofthefleet

ive eyes like a racing dogs bollix on a frosty morning (a bad hangover)

shove it up yer swiss/bollix/brenda/the eye of your prick

Sam Kade

She wouldn't give her sh1t to the crow's.

Nokem

She's that horny she'd get up on a monday morning

He wouldnt get his hole on a polo factory

I wouldnt be gone on his/her face.

I wouldn't get up on her to paint the ceiling

she looks like lego

She's no pony but she'd do for a ride around the room.

number10a

Sam Kade wrote: »

She wouldn't give her sh1t to the crow's.

I forgot about that one. Love it though!!! :D

niamhy84

So hungry id eat a scabby cows arse through a hedge!:D

He'd peel an orange in his pocket..!:P (mean)!

The Agogo

-We're getting loads of weather (Adam/Paul)

-There'll be two hits in this fight: me hitting you, and you hittin the fcuking ground!

-she's as mad as a bag of spiders

-I'd get better head off a pint of Guinness

-He wouldn't p*ss on you if you were on fire

-If you ran out of bogroll he'd pass you a crisp bag

-you'd have better-kept secrets telling the nationals' than telling her

areu4real?

She has a fanny like a wizards sleeve

She has a face like a stuntmans elbow

It was like ridin' a bucket of water

She has a fanny like a stab wound in a gorrillas back


Unrelated harsh joke I heard today:

What does one in ten people not enjoy?

Gang rape

The Agogo

good stuff..

mega man

you've a head like a well bet arse

mega man

i'll give her a slap of the fat lad-

mega man

hows she cutten

Tropheus

I my auntie had balls, she'd be my uncle.

Flipz4Rollz

(in a fight)There'll be 3 hits. Me hittin' you, you hittin' the ground....And the ambulance hittin' 90!

Flipz4Rollz

Be good...and if ya cant be good, Be good at it.

Flipz4Rollz

someone talkin' about A hurler: "shur he has the first-touch of a rapist!"

Bearhunter

A few I've heard recently:

I'd ate the decorations off a hearse (hungry0

He's that lazy he wouldn't sleep under the same roof as a shovel.

He's that lazy he wouldn't get out of bed unless the work got in beside him.

And an old one (that a girl once said to me in public and at volume):

"If I'd a dog that looked like you I'd shave his arse and teach him to walk backwards."

Ciaran187

It was like opening the window and ridin' the night.

He'd get up on a clipped hedge.

Wouldn't ride her for practice.

He'd stick his hand into a bucket of t!ts and come out sucking his thumb.

A face only a mother could love.

A fanny like opening a cheese toastie.

nipps

jaysus, i'm sweating like a priest in a playground!

taytothief

You're as contrary as a bag of weasels.
I'll bounce ya off the walls
I wouldn't win it if I was the only one in it.
Sh!ttin bricks!
I'll kick ya into the middle of next week.

Dave H

Class thread:D
Here's another few,
Me belly thinks me throat's cut.
I would'nt get up on her to get over.
(when trying to put something into something else,ie a key), Jaysis, if it had hair on it you'd go in quick enough.
I'd bet the back of me sack on it.
I hope he dies roaring.
Sure if it was'nt for me arse I'd have nowhere to sit.