If your ever bored in Tesco!

TwistsAndTurns

01 . Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's trolleys
when they aren't looking.

02. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute
intervals

03. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies
toilet.

04. Walk up to an employee and tell him?her in an official tone:
Code 3 in Housewares... and see what happens.

05. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on credit.

06. Move a 'CAUTION -WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

07. Set-up a tent in the Camping Department and tell other shoppers you
are sleeping over and invite them in if they bring pillows from the
bedding Department.

08. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask:
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

09. Look right into the security
camera, use it as a mirror and pick
your nose.

10. While handling large knives in the Kitchen Dept, ask the clerk if he
knows where the anti-depressants are located.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme
from Mission Impossible.

12. Hide in a clothing rack . . . and when people browse
through,
say: "PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!"

13. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, hit the floor and
assume the foetal position and scream "NO! ........It's those voices
again!!!"

And last but not least:

14. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while... then yell
loudly: "There's no toilet paper in here."

RobertFoster

I read it a few years ago for Wal*Mart instead of Tesco. Still funny though

PowerHouseDan

Very good i like it

Diarmsquid

eirebhoys wrote:

01 . Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's trolleys
when they aren't looking.

You don't know how badly I wanna do that. :rolleyes:

county

very good:)

Gray

[QUOTE=08. When a clerk asks if they can help you,."[/QUOTE]

Now that is a joke:)

de5p0i1er

LOL. Love it, gotta try some of those some day.

Rhyme

Old but still funny, id lvoe to try the "Pick ME, Pick MEE!" one.

Walked into Lidl a week back, they had the condoms stacked beside the hot sauce... *ahem*

gerTheGreat

Classic. I know what I'm doing this weekend:D

422nd

What a funny start to the morning! I live near 2 Tescos.....need I say more!

jobonar

eirebhoys wrote:

01 . Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's trolleys
when they aren't looking.

brilliant!!
really wanna do this! the look on peoples faces as thy reach the check out would be only priceless!!

Mimikyu

This post has been deleted.

Sam Vimes

Solitaryman666 wrote:

This post has been deleted.

like saying "don't worry they open again". i think i saw it on www.shanemcdonald.com in the humour section

yeroulfella

they were the best one's in a while. they have to be in the top 3 of things to do lists

BlueSpiral

Solitaryman666 wrote:

This post has been deleted.

LMAO! that's the best one

"poke someone when there are only two of you in the lift, claim it wasn't you"

"wait til someone gets on, then press all the buttons"

"when the lift is pretty full, start screaming "the voices, the voices they're back!!!".:pEdit: found it!

TwistsAndTurns

BlueSpiral wrote:

LMAO! that's the best one

"poke someone when there are only two of you in the lift, claim it wasn't you"

"wait til someone gets on, then press all the buttons"

"when the lift is pretty full, start screaming "the voices, the voices they're back!!!".:pEdit: found it!

I must say, your in my void.. :cool:

BlueSpiral

Sorry, but just had to add that link.