Confusing Situation

LegacyUser

Okay, so this is gonna take a short while to explain, so here we go.

And before I start, I just want to acknowledge the fact that I am a prick, and I know this. Anyways, here we go.

A couple of months ago I got with this girl. We kissed the odd time and then she decided we'd make better friends. I was okay with that. So things went back to us being friends. I shall call her Girl 1 to stop confusion.

Recently (within the past 2 weeks) I starting "going out with" this girl I work with, Girl 2, and things were going grand. And yet within the past week or so, Girl 1 and I have moved into a house with 2 other people. Since then me and Girl 1 have been getting on extremely well, spending the night with each other in the same bed, and kissing.

I have realised that I really would like to be with Girl 1, and she wants to be with me. Yet I am not sure what to do about Girl 2. Before people think too badly of me, myself and Girl 1 getting together again was completely unplanned.. and unexpected, but I've been so happy.

Now, Girl 2 knows that me and Girl 1 have been with each other before, and she seems okay with it. that’s one thing that gets to me. She's not mad. I'm kinda wishing she was mad at me, and that she hated me. But she doesn't.

What does a guy do when he realises that he wants to be with someone more than he wants to be with his "girlfriend" (I put this in ""'s because I'm not entirely sure what’s happening between us)?

And please, can I get honest answers and not people coming along telling me how guys do this and do that, because I do not want this to break out into a gender discussion. Thank you.

LegacyUser

GirlWoes. wrote:

Recently (within the past 2 weeks) I starting "going out with" this girl I work with, Girl 2, and things were going grand. And yet within the past week or so, Girl 1 and I have moved into a house with 2 other people. Since then me and Girl 1 have been getting on extremely well, spending the night with each other in the same bed, and kissing.

I have realised that I really would like to be with Girl 1, and she wants to be with me. Yet I am not sure what to do about Girl 2.


What does a guy do when he realises that he wants to be with someone more than he wants to be with his "girlfriend" (I put this in ""'s because I'm not entirely sure what’s happening between us)?

.

Blimey. I would have thought that it would be patently obvious.
"Shift" Girl 2 and "BE" with Girl 1.
Whaddaya think? Good idea?

quickbeam

Don't see the problem, tbh. Break-up with Girl2 and start dating Girl1. What's complicated about it?

qz

Yeah, if you're happier with Girl 1 then leave Girl 2.

Black Swan

Go with Girl 1 and be honest and tell Girl 2.

kdouglas

yup, gotta agree with that, break up with girl2, is there any other issues here that your not mentioning as to why this (pretty obvious) answer didnt occur to you naturally?

spinandscribble

go for girl number 1. if i was girl 2 and i was told what had happened i'd have major trust issues after this. just dont you dare think you could make a go of number 2 once number one dumps you again. plus i'd question girl number ones morals if she'd do this to your girlfriend.
its a real shame for number 2. not that she wont have you (she's better off tbh) but that shes such a lovely innocent girl who'd trust you to such a degree. but i'l take it she doesnt know about the sleepovers?
yes and you are a prick. i know you know that but im sorry every bone in my body wanted to say that lol.

Wing Walker

Whoa there Nelly!!! What's changed with Girl 1 that she now doesn't want to be just friends???

Leaving that to one side, you've gotta be a bit grown up about this and tell Girl 2 that it's not working out between you two. It's not fair on her. Unless, and I'm not sure if you're saying this in your op but, does Girl 2 know that you're still with Girl 1 and she's ok about it?

ST*

GirlWoes. wrote:

I have realised that I really would like to be with Girl 1, and she wants to be with me. Yet I am not sure what to do about Girl 2. Before people think too badly of me, myself and Girl 1 getting together again was completely unplanned.. and unexpected, but I've been so happy.

****

What does a guy do when he realises that he wants to be with someone more than he wants to be with his "girlfriend" (I put this in ""'s because I'm not entirely sure what’s happening between us)?

You said you have been so happy with girl 1, but girl 2 is still intriguing? Doesn't sound like you are ready for a relationship with girl 1, and will probably hurt her if you don't put things on hold till you sort your head out. I wouldn't use that as an opportunity to get it on with girl 2 and head back to 1 if you decide shes not for you.

It is a case of 'you want what you can't have' here.

Wing Walker

ST* wrote:

It is a case of 'you want what you can't have' here.

Actually, that's it in a nutshell.

chazzy06

wat ever girl makes u the happiest go with ur gut feeling.. no matter what the circumstances are, 1 girl is going to get hurt in the process but ur better off thinking of what u really want now b4 u loose both girls...

The Hill Billy

It sounds like you want to have your cake & eat it.
If that is the case you could always say to both of them (not at the same time) that you wish to maintain non-exclusive relationships with them.
You will then be in a position to see both girls &, likewise, the can continue to see other guys.

It is a recipe for a whole world of pain, but it is an option nonetheless.

Epicpriest

You have a cake, now eat it... Until you know what you're reallt thinking. Because girl1 sounds like she won't go out with you anyway? maybe i picked it up wrong.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the responses.

So here's whats happening at this current moment in time:

Myself and Girl 2 met up to discuss things. She knew about Girl 1 previously, as I had mentioned her at some point. Can't remember what exactly what it was that I said. Anyways, myself and Girl 2 have decided that we would be better off as friends, and we have been relatively okay since then! I have been on holidays which shall be over on Wednesday, so I am unsure as of how things will be between us, but I would love to have her as a friend, and she feels the same way.

Girl 1 and I have been getting very close, with the understanding that we are not in a relationship. Which I am perfectly okay with. And as some people have mentioned, if things don't work out between me and Girl 1, I will not go back to Girl 2 like that. I am happy with the way things are between me and Girl 1 as I have had strong feelings for since the very first time I met her. Yet if it ends, it ends. I'm still going to be friends with her because I think its pointless to stop being friends with somebody because of this.

John Mason

why not be with both neither one seem too bother about you being with the other - personally i dont either of them are that in to you and so use and abuse my friend

Wing Walker

irishbird wrote:

so use and abuse my friend

Well isn't that a lovely sentiment!!! :rolleyes: