Leaving go.... (long)

LegacyUser

Ive been using boards for good while now and Im in a situation and thought I would post it here... you guys are real big help Ive noticed from reading this forum !

OK... I have to get this out somehow cause im going crazy and I want it to stop... Sorry its so long and it goes into a bit of detail..

I was going out with a girl for 6 months and 2 weeks, it was my first ever serious relationship Im 17 and she 15 I know were young... In that time we fell in love (she was my second and I was her first love)(my 1st love wasn't proper now that I think about it i was never going out with the girl)The relationship was great in my opinion and I know she thought the same we were in love and like we done things which neither of us had done before(no sex but we had planned on doing it)I was always nice to her made her dinner and stuf and like we said always said we wanted to live with each other and all that stuf... but there was a few things that we could have fixed like fights over like she always said she was a bitch(which she wasnt really) and stuf.. Also I was clingy and she thought id liked other girls which I think is impossible to do both..!

But no relationship is perfect right ?

Now almost a month ago she broke up with me and I tried desperately to get her back in loads of ways... This didnt work.. Ive cried almost every day for 3 weeks and I still cry now just not as often I try to keep it out of my mind but its too hard ! A week after we broke up she met some other guy (Older than me and I know him too hes had a reputation of not being nice towards women just hes a goodlookin guy) and is still with him (I dont think there going out so she says anyway) I kept trying to get her back and I became a pest which I didnt want to be, then eventually this guy came into the situation and told me she didnt love me anymore (which I didnt know) Now you can imagine how I felt then.. This guy who is with the girl I love tells me she doesnt love me anymore ! You would expect people who break up that were in love for the 1st time would eventually lose that love !? Now that screwed me up even more !

It gets worse... This guy made fun of me...!!! All the stuf I was telling her about how I felt about her and stuf.. she told him... Hes one of those "EMO" guys piereced lips and stuf and what he said me to me was, your calling me EMO you the one whos crying every 5 minutes ! In the last 7 months that ive know her thats the only thing shes ever done that pi**ed me off !

shes convinced she loved me more in the relationship and that im over her now and ive moved on and im happy(which im not as you can tell)... this just like frustrates the hell outa me as you can imagine !?

Also I feel like she doesnt give a damn about me anymore and nearly everytime we talk we fight ! She did txt me the other night saying it was pointless and we should stop and I agreed which I thought was nice of her and it made me feel alot better but I just cant help trying I cant accept its over !

I have had chances to meet other people but I havnt taken any of these, besides one which didnt even work ! Now I dont want anyone I actually dont care theres only one girl I want !

I'll have to wrap this up now its getting a tad long... Basically I cant leave go and I really need help, I keep thinking were going to get back together and I know it wont happen ! Shes told me she doesn't want to but like I just cant leave go ! I keep thinking if shes stops meeting this other guy she'll realise what she had with me and want to try again.. It may sound sad cause after what happened but in spite of it all I still love her more than anything in the world and would take her back in a heartbeat if she asked me ! I guess thats what love does to you !?

So if you read all this thanks a million and thaks a billion for any replies !

P.S if anybody has been in this situation before can you tell how you dealt with it, if you dont mind it would really help..Thanks

Beruthiel

You are not going to like what I have to say.
Leave her alone, you are acting like a bunny boiler and all you are doing is confirming that she did the right thing.
At 17 your hormones are all over the camp, feelings and emotions can be very difficult to handle. Getting over your first love is never easy.
Keep yourself busy, throw yourself into some hobbies, most of all keep away from her and try to keep her out of your mind.
It's over, you need to accept this or else you'll go slowly mad.
Take if from me, we've all felt like this at some point in our lives, but if you do the above, you'll look back in a year and wonder what all the fuss was.

Chakar

Seems like you would greatly benefit talking about your feelings with someone that you like and trust.They could then reassure you and help you get through it.Maybe your parents? or a professional?

kdouglas

i dont mean to sound harsh, but just get over it

the relationship is over, dont dwell in the past, the way things are at the moment, your better off not even talking to her or seeing her for a while, still being in contact is only going to make you think about her more, at least if she's not around its easier to deal with. If you are good friends then your friendship will return, but trying to go straight to just friends from a relationship can be difficult.

get out and enjoy yourself, dont think about her, she's moved on, its time for you to do the same.

LegacyUser

I know what your talking about and dont worry my situation cant get any worse ! I have a good friend (a girl no feelings or anything) who I talk to daily and if it wasnt for her I would have surely gone mad ! I have told my mam about all this she just thinks its a shame cause she thought we were great together !

I wana be friends with her.. and I know she does too ! Otherwise she wouldn't have txt me the the other night sayin we should stop fighting cause its pointless and crap ! Just its hard when I still wana be with her so much...

I also realise that i will look on it in a year without problem... just now its hard as you can guess !

TIME IS ALL IT TAKES.... just need reasurance !

Chucky the tree

your name isnt matt is it? Its just that you seem very eager to let people walk all over you.

Get over it. I dont why your even considering taking her back after what she did to you. If she was willing to tell her current fella everything about the relationship etc then its fairly clear she doesnt give a toss about you.

LegacyUser

Well I suppose thats one way of putting it !

This is what love does to you I understand were your coming from but its hard is all !

PiE

love

love

A week after we broke up she met some other guy

love

What?

LegacyUser

You trying to say she never loved me !?

Marksie

At your age you are just in the cusp of adulthood and still growing and developing
All these emotions are new, very frightening and very intense. It is hard on you as you are new to all this.
Time is what it takes, she has to make her own mistakes and so have you.

While it seems the world is collapsing aruond you this is not the case at all.
Have you considered that when she was telling yu she was a bitch she may have been warning you? Also, you say you were clingy? sometimes this drives girls away.

It is no shame to show emotions and at your age they bubble to the top very easily..it will pass.
She was only 15 and has moved on to someone else, if he treats her badly, then she too will have a lesson to learn.


For now the best thing that you can do is to have no contact at all, you are only upsetting yourself and appearing as a pest which will piss everyone off.

If you have hobbies and friends then throw yourself into them.
Move on there is a wide world out there.

takola

I get what you're saying about it being hard. It is hard to get over your first love! But dwelling on this isn't going to help you at all. As Beruthiel said you need to stay away from her and keep your mind of her. You're only young!! It will get better in a few weeks.

TBH I think if a girl could start going out with someone else a week after you broke up then she wasn't as much in love with you as you think! And telling her new boyfriend everything you said to her whilst in the relationship is a really callous thing to do! I think you're better off without people like that! She proved she can't be trusted!

Take a step back, take a deep breath and move on. You don't have to do it right now but don't dwell too long. She's not coming back.

Slutmonkey57b

Idontknow:( wrote:

You trying to say she never loved me !?

Yes, he is. Ok, that's harsh. He's actually saying: She's a 16 year old kid who hasn't a clue what she's at. You're a 17 year old kid with no clue. Don't worry about it, though - everyone's a clueless idiot when they're a teenager, you'll look back in 10 years and wonder what you were thinking.