Question for single/separated parents.

tk123

My nephew (11) has been staying with us for the last month - he lives abroad with his mother and stepfather and his dad, my brother has his own place here. My brother is working at the moment so has been coming down to our house most evenings. When he comes down he sits out in the back garden by himself and goes asleep and basically says hello and goodnight to his son. Even when he says he will take him out/come and see him we have no idea what time he will come at and there have been occasions where he hasn't shown up or hasn't come down to see his son for days without letting us know. Anyhoos to get to the point my brother ordered (not asked) that from now on when we take "his son" out we're to text him before we leave and when we come back. My mother said that she will not ask his permission to take her grandson out when he isn't bothered spending time with him at all and there was a blazing row. Is he being unreasonable??

Nevyn

Yes.
Why is his son not living with him if his son is over for the summer ?
I can understand that family are 'helping' with the childcare and wanting to see thier grandson/nephew but it does seem like he is shirking his responsibilies.

tk123

Thanks Thaedydal - I needed to vent! . I don't think he really has any interest in the child it's more that he wants to get back at his ex and her husband. He's very volatile and even started to give out to my nephew asking who was his father in the room (with me and my parents) because thats who he has to listen to. He has also told him on the phone that he might go to jail because he can't afford(doesn't want to) pay maintainence - out of the blue the poor child asked me one day was that true! We're just trying to make his last few weeks fun so he doesn't have bad memories. My mum is at her wits end because she can't understand how he can treat his child like this..