Best things about being gay

Vinnie69

1. None of my gay friends speak with a lisp. Where are all these lisp-speaking people that you have met and why are they gay or is this your opinion of people with lisps ?

2. Not every gay like heterosexuals, we will not insult/argue with you when on a night out with friends for example, but that does not mean that we don’t often feel uncomfortable with them.

3. I think you do an injustice to heterosexuals.
Like some gays, they love to tell you of thier latest conquests and what went on in the bedroom. be it what they shoved up or where it was shove up wherever. By the way there ain't nowhere different between what heterosexuals and gay shove things Why do I need to know this? Do I want or need to know what type of sex they enjoy?
4. St Patrick's Day Parade or paramilitary or loyalists' parades. WFT? What is the point. I don’t give a crap what type of nationalist that you may like.
Perhaps you prefer your two-old daughter to see murderers and bombers to people kissing.

5.Gay people are not as broad minded as they like to think.Whose says that all gays are broad-minded ? They are not, there are as many narrow-minded gays as there as many narrow-minded heterosexuals !
If someone agrees with you, then they are considered 'open minded' etc. etc.

Yet if someone disagrees, they live in 'the dark ages' and should be silenced. I thought the whole idea was freedom of expression?

Applies to all.

6. Are you banned now? I hope not, as I'd genuinely love to discuss some of these issues. As I said I don't hate anybody, but I like to be able to speak my mind (As you do too).
Why should you be banned? You are entitled to your opinions.

I don't feel that I can change your attitude but I don't hate you for being different.

Annasopra

Cnoc16 wrote:

I'll hazard the risk of being banned here...

First, I don't hate gay people, In fact I don’t really hate anyone but I do have strong objections to the whole gay thing. If you will, I'd like to list why.

Again, I'm probably risking getting banned or slagged off, since I'm on your part of the forum, but perhaps one or two of you will respond with considered answers to the objections that the likes of me have to homosexuals. I'm genuinely interested in your views on a couple of questions.

You're immediately assuming a them Vs us attitude there. I don't see this as OUR part of the forum.

Cnoc16 wrote:

1. Why do (a lot) of gay men talk with a high pitched voice or a lisp?

To me, this shows that the camp thing is put on. If it is not put on, then there must be a hormonal imbalance. I once mentioned the whole idea of a chemical/hormonal imbalance to a gay friend of mine, and he hit the roof. If there is no hormonal imbalance, there is no other reason for the lisp - other than a put-on.

Firstly a lot of straight people are camp, secondly I know a lot of gay people that don't speak with a lisp or high pitched voice. Maybe you've just been watching Graham Norton and Will and Grace too much

Cnoc16 wrote:

2. Contrary to popular belief, everyone does not love gay people. Many heterosexuals will not insult/argue with you when on a night out with friends for example, but that does not mean that we don’t often feel uncomfortable with the whole idea.

Poular belief is that everyone loves gay people?!? I am really stunned by that! As I've never heard that before! You say that "we" don't feel comfortable - perhaps you might not but I would hazard a guess that actually quite a lot of people are indifferent and accepting!

Cnoc16 wrote:

3. I think you do yourselves an injustice.
Most gay people seem to define themselves as such. I don’t tell people what type of sex I like. I keep my bedroom life private. Any gay people I have met seem to have a need to tell me they are gay (in other words, take it in the bum) Why do I need to know this? Do you want or need to know what type of sex I enjoy?

I don't as a gay man openly go round telling people what kind of sex I like. Some gay men do. Some straight men do.
You are the one there who automatically associates being gay with anal sex. Guess what? in a recent report of sexual behaviour in Ireland 70% of gay men reported never having anal sex

Society has automatically assumed that you are heterosexual. It has placed this distinct set of behavioural norms on you. You do not have to break outside those norms or reject those norms because you are in fact heterosexual. You do not have to "come out" as heterosexual. You do not have to suffer abuse and discrimination because you are heterosexual.

I would hazard a guess some gay men feel the need to tell everyone they are gay because they are trying to reject what society has dictated as normal behaviour and trying to forget about the discrimination and abuse.

Cnoc16 wrote:

4. Gay parades. WFT? What is the point. I don’t give a crap what type of sex you like.
Either does my 2 year old daughter. She does not need to see gay people (or anyone for that matter) with little clothing, kissing and parading down our main street shouting about sex. She is two for Christs sake.

Again you assume that gay pride parades are all about "the type of sex we like"

Having particiapated in Pride Parades in Dublin and Belfast I very much reject your assertion that all Pride Parades are are people shouting about sex. I have many straight friends who love attending.

Pride for me is about rejecting shame. Societal conditioning has meant that we as Lesbians, Gay Men, Bisexual and Transgender people have been bought up as thinking that we should be ashamed, that there is something wrong with us.

Pride is about reinforcing the positive things about being gay. It is about recognising and celebrating our lives as LGBT people (because we have so often been told we can't do so)

It is about recognising diversity amongst us - the LGBT community.

It is, to quote someone else engaging "in a communal coming out to celebrate our diversity, our identity, our sameness and difference and that of everyone who can’t or won’t come out themselves"

Pride has other functions it provides a social space to see gay people being themselves outside of a bar. (especially the families) It reassures us that we are not in as small a minority as we might think. It provides a sense of comradery and support in the LGBT commmunity. For some of us it provides us with a comfortable space that can be more of a home then our real home.

Pride is about many things - recognising our history of the stonewall marches and the fairview park murders, protesting about inequality, celebrating being ourselves.

It's a party, a protest, a community, a carnival all rolled into one

Cnoc16 wrote:

5. Gay people are not as broad minded as they like to think.
If someone agrees with you, then they are considered 'open minded' etc. etc.

Yet if someone disagrees, they live in 'the dark ages' and should be silenced. I thought the whole idea was freedom of expression?

Is it only freedom of expression if we agree with homosexuality? or are anti (anything) people allowed to speak these days?. If someone is not comfortable with homosexuality, you label them a religious freak. You seem to feel that everybody is supposed to agree with you - But this aint communism. You are becoming the thing you once hated: Insulting, tunnel visioned and repressive.

Firstly I think that there are diverse opinions on free speech and broad mindedness in the LGBT community. Freedom of expression is fine to a limit and that limit must (in my opinion) be where hate filled language is used and actually encourages violence. We would be foolish to think that we should have 100% agreement and acceptance but I believe that we must fight ignorance and opression.

I don't see everyone suddenly labelling you a religious freak

Hmm_Messiah

strong objections to the whole gay thing

while your "objections" are less extreme than some, I find it a curious thing to say here . Eventually you will have to get beyond it - the whole gay thing is here to stay.

1. About half the gay people I've know had affectations of some sort. It bugs me too at times, though when I know the person more I tend to find it less annoying . I don't like it a) because I guess I don't understand it b) because I found it distorts what I do understand gay to mean.

2. you have a strange grasp of popular belief - you might ask the people who have to fight for basic rights, or those victims of assault and homophobia, and the many who fel they can't be honest about their lives..

3. Some people do seem to define themselves by their sexuality, that's true. & sad.

4. Gay Parades? I dont really get them myself, or at least their understanding of "Pride" - in 2006 I am not proud that I'm 6ft, or lefthanded or gay. Regarding your 2 yr old daughter a) you seem to have a poor grasp of child development if you think any parade would affect a 2 yr old kid b) if you objected to militarism you might avoid an army parade, or your daughter seeing one, I duobt you'd contend you have a right that your discomfort would override their right to parade.

5. Not sure this is exactly what you said but I would agree some gay people are as prejudiced and polarised as the people they accuse. I guess that's the human condition.

Cnoc16

While my opinions are probably with me for life, some of the replies provoked thought and were explained well. Clears up one or two things anyway.

Thanks for the replies.