25 year old neighbour-funeral today

Pipp

Hello folks,
I dont know why Im posting this, I suppose Im just looking for some kind words.
The story is that a childhood playmate and neighbour for all of my life has died and is being buried today, on his 25th Birthday.
He was a harmless, happy-go lucky nice bloke who always had a smile and a "how are you?" for everyone. He was helping out a mate giving them a lift home and he lost control of the car and sustained severe head injuries and subsequently died.
He was a simple kind of guy, had several lovely pedigree dogs that he just loved to show, one in particular that was really beginning to win serious competitions. We used to chat about my dogs alot, and he helped my out with stuff.
Its going to be very very strange visiting my parents house now, (Ive since moved out) without him passing by giving us the nod and wave.
Its very very strange to think of someone who you used to play with out on the road being dead.
My poor Mum is distraught, as is my aunt, who was related to him.
He was brought to the church last night and Ive only ever seen as large a funeral once before, which was for someone who also died very tragically.
Anyway, I suppose I just wanted to verbalise this, as I couldnt go to the funeral mass today, and its difficult to work knowing this is going on at home.
I paid my respects to his family last night and I have no idea how they are going to go through this.
Take it easy on the roads folks..:(

Teamhair

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Its sad for everyone when a person so young dies in tragic circumstances. You're right to verbalise how you feel- maybe you should actually put pen to paper, perhaps write a letter to your friend saying all the things you wish you had the chance to. Sign the letter with a goodbye and place in an envelope then keep it. Sounds a bit odd, I know, but it was a trick my mom taught me and it may help to give you a bit of comfort and some sense of peace.

daveg

I can sympathise. When I was in collage one of my mates from secondary school had a car accident. A few of them were killed. Same type of chap, really friendly, not a bad bone in his body. He was from the same village as me. Over 10 years later I still occasionally think of him. Was very very sad.

BoozyBabe

Yes, it's so sad, but it's a story being repeated up & down this country, day in, day out, & we never learn.

It's such a sad waste of a life, I just wish we'd learn from it, but we never seem to.....

A neighbour of mine (24) killed his best friend a few years ago in a crash. Neighbour was absolutely pissed, driving at a crazy speed, lost control & wrapped his car & best friend around a tree & seriously injured a few other friends.
Has he learned anything? No, I meet him on a regular occurance on dangerous roads absolutely flying, with nowhere to go should an obstruction arise.

Another neighbour (mid 40's) was smuggling booze or fags across the boarder a few years ago, got chased by the police, so raced them, trying to get to the republic before getting caught. Drove straight through a crossroads & killed an entire family (2 young children). This man has young children of his own.
Of course he was very sorry & it killed him for a while, he even did a year in prison for it. He's out now. Has he learned anything about the dangers of driving? Not at all.
I meet him every morning on a narrow twisty road & he's doing at least 100kmph & he's in the middle of the road going around the corner while waving hello to me. I'm too busy heading for the ditch to get past him to wave back.

I just want to stop the car, get out & slap him & tell him to cop to fcuk on!!!

We just never learn.......................

RiderOnTheStorm

that is real sad, a'right. My condolances to you and your friends family. I hope they find comfort somewhere in the times to come.

I myself find comfort in knowing that I will someday meet loved ones again in the afterlife. I know its not very popular, but I believe in the old fashoned heaven / pearly gates / God. It really helps me when I loose someone close, or when I hear about kids / young people dieing. I think it would help the people close to them too, if they thought that their loved ones are now being cared for by the ultimate consoler.

Hope this doesnt sound corney. It works for me, and I just wanted to pass it on. Whatever you believe or do, I hope you find comfort, and I hope you and neighbours family can help each other come to terms with this tragic loss.

Pipp

thanks for all the replies folks,
it helps.

Marksie

I feel for you and his family
my nephew died of a heart attack at 28. it was so sensless.

All i can say is allow yourself to grieve for him and be there for his family.
My Brother and his wife have been supported by their neighbours and friends and it has really helped.
you never forget, but by helping the family, you are helping them come to terms and helping yourself to come to terms for that matter.
it may not seem like it is helping. but over time the kindness adds up.

And all you youngsters out there.. please, read this thread and learn to be careful on the roads.

CathyMoran

My best friend (who was 6 at the time) died in a hotel fire along with her 2 year old brother and mum and dad 26 years ago. My parents did not let me go to the funeral at the time but she has always stayed in my memory and for the past 2 years I have gone down to the place where she died to pay my respects around her anniversary. I think that the best thing that you can do is keep the memory of your friend alive and drive safely. By even posting this you may have made one or two people change their driving behaviour and may have saved someone's life.