Knowing and following your "thing" in life. For me it's music, but...

LegacyUser

Not entirely certain why I'm going unreg on this one to be honest, I guess I just want to share my thoughts and get the opinions of others.

I'm 30 years of age and for much of my twenties I played music as my main pursuit in life. It went quite well and considering I was releasing my music independently I got great press, radio and TV coverage. At one point it really seemed like something was going to happen for me. I had a manager paying me to make music and UK record companies were interested. And when a top producer who I loved said he was astounded to hear an artist so developed who didn't have a record deal I decided to go along with him and put all my eggs in one basket. He swore blind he'd get me a record deal as long as I agreed he'd produce my debut album. Within a couple of months it all fell apart. I was devastated. Having been lead up the garden path of the music business many times I actually thought this time was real. And so I more or less completely stopped playing for over 2 years. And it was two of the most fun years of my life. Without working so hard on my music I just partied a lot, had incredible fun and learned alot about myself.

What's started happening now is that I've been falling in love with writing music again and am making what is defintiely my best music ever and without blowing my own trumpet it is music that a lot of others could genuinely get into too. I used to feel like I was born to make music but now I don't have that confidence. I know longer feel like it is as black and white and I'm not as pushed about being a rich/famous/sucessful and as a result my music feels looser and much more enjoyable. It's kind of great. But the problem is that without the blind confidence of youth I'm nervous about commiting to making something happen with my music, especially as I am getting older (although in the youth obsessed music industry it's probably a little lucky I still look only 24) and have a whole life completely unrelated to music for the first time in my life.

Has anyone turned their life around like this? Am I mad and should I just keep it as a beautiful hobby? Should I just go for it and feel lucky that I have such a strong desire for one passion and talent? If I was given a button to push that would instantly create my perfect life it would be that one that would give me a modest (or better?!) life from writing and playing muisc. So why can't I just make the leap and do? My head is wrecked with this!!

_patchouli

Hi OP,

I know how you feel, being passionately interested in something but feeling that your hands are tied.
I'm just wondering what the dilemma is in your case. Do you have a day job and is it that you are reluctant to pack it in for financial reasons?

If so, my advice would be to continue with your day job for the time being and continue with the music in your free time.
You could aim to leave your day job some time next year, but in the meantime save as much as you can so that you could afford to support yourself for a few months.

You did say that you put all your eggs in one basket a few years ago, and it didn't work out.
From what you said, I would definitely encourage you to keep trying. If you don't you'll regret it. You'll always be thinking "what if..".
Maybe have a look at the Music boards and you might be able to get some advice of a practical nature re how to get your career back on track.

Believe in yourself & best of luck with it.

Cianos

If you dont have wife/kids/mortgage/, do it now before its too late. You are young enough so that if it all goes bad you can pick things back up again. But right now you have the drive and the passion and that is by far the most important thing. Good luck

Shad0r

Doing something for a living that you love doing has to be one of the most important elements of finding happiness in your life and you are obviously big into your music.

In that industry the reality is that very few people find it easy to become established. Particularly in this country. You may not have the youthful confidence that basically comes from ignorance about how difficult things really are, but what you do have now is experience and knowledge about how things can go and the workings of the industry.

I'd say go for it but choose the people that you listen to carefully. If they arent well established then chances are they dont know what they are talking about.

Your the only one who can make your dreams come true

Black Swan

I dropped my university plans, worked through an agent, and got a gig overseas. But I am not a musician or composer. Someone who you should chat with on these boards is Lust4Life. She hangs out a lot in the Cuckoo's Nest on these boards.

Sonderval

You know, you'd be crazy (IMO) to give up that dream, OP, especially when it is something that you clearly are very good at and it has brought you this far. Ambitions like yours have a way of testing the person to the limit, sometimes bringing you so close to your objective and snatching it away that your left despondent. The real test of your commitment and character is to get back on the horse and keep trying - nothing worth achieving is ever easy.

The fact that you've learned alot in the time away from it all indicates perhaps that those years were a neccessary interlude. Just don't give up on your dream if thats what it really is!

cooker3

I think you should go for it. I would love to have a chance to live my life through my verious passions although I sense your passion for music is greater then any passion I may have.
Living your life doing something you love is something far too few people get to experience, try to be 1 of the lucky ones.

dublinlawyer

Has anyone turned their life around like this?
Absolutely lots of people. I like sport and Im currently reading George Hookes autobiography who I dont even like that much but its a story about redemption. I say pick a good biography to learn that people do it all the time. Has David Gray got one?

Am I mad and should I just keep it as a beautiful hobby? Should I just go for it and feel lucky that I have such a strong desire for one passion and talent?
I think you want it to be more than just a hobby. But I agree with others that doesnt mean you necessarily have to give up all your plans and current career for it. Try and reach a comprimise. And when the time is right to go all out you'll know it.

Generally if I could write, and I cant all i can do is play other peoples tunes, I would try and think outside the box. Why not forget about the record companies and approach advertising companies or the large marketing departments of a large company or a film producer and say I think this tune would be great for your product/film. Imagine if your tune was on the next "Intermission" - the record companies would come knocking.

LegacyUser

Thanks a million for the replies. They may seem like just a few words but through your replies I am seeing my own thoughts crystallizing about something that, while not a matter of life or death, is incredibly important to me.

It seems that as each day passes I'm wondering why on earth I have been doing anything other than my music. I have decided that I have to give it a really big push. I have other commitments and I don't quite know where I'll squeeze them all in but I know I'll find a way becasue this is just too important to me to not do it. For a while I thought I was going to give it up for ever and that felt pretty horrible, I'm not going to let that happen. I also have far, far too much music flowing around inside me that I desperatley want to get into peoples ears and hearts. And I intend on trying to enjoy as much of it all as possible!
Thank you boardsies for all the replies.

dr.bollocko

Man how could you not try as hard as possible? Good luck, but why are you even asking? "Would I like to do **** all, or what I've always wanted to do?"
Hmmm.
Tough question.

madhitchhiker

it's nice to know what you want and to follow it up, but seldom do these happen.:mad:

nontheless, keep going!:D