Fat Issues

LegacyUser

I was just wondering what the general concencus toward a Fat bloke is with girls in terms of hooking up. I would be quite muscley but with fat all around it. Im no Johnny vegas but would probably be 2-3 stone overweight. What i really want to know is how big of an issue would it be in an initial meeting?

Dragan

overweight wrote:

I was just wondering what the general concencus toward a Fat bloke is with girls in terms of hooking up. I would be quite muscley but with fat all around it. Im no Johnny vegas but would probably be 2-3 stone overweight. What i really want to know is how big of an issue would it be in an initial meeting?

Depends entirely upon the person dude, everyone is different man.

And to be honest, if your "quite muscly with fat all around it" then your really just fat. Believe me, i told myself the same thing for long enough.

BoozyBabe

I'd love to say that for me it doesn't matter at all, but the truth is, it does.

But, as was said:- it really does depend on the person, & how well you carry it, how you dress to disguise it, etc

Can you think of a famous person that we'd know whos physique would be very similar to yours.
If so, then I could give you an honest answer.

Trinity

It really depends on the individual - i'd be more inclined to be put off by a skinny man, i like men with a bit of meat on him.

But i think if you are comfortable enough in your own skin and give off an air of confidence and have a nice personality it should not be a huge issue if someone likes you for you.

Colm_OReilly

But i think if you are comfortable enough in your own skin and give off an air of confidence and have a nice personality it should not be a huge issue if someone likes you for you.

This carries a lot more weight than physical appearance when it comes to attraction.

What I'm hearing from the post is that you're self conscious around your weight and that's projecting outward when you meet someone you like.

Two options: Work on your confidence, and lose the weight. The best strategy is to work on both. If you're serious about weight loss you might like to visit www.thepaleodiet.com and www.crossfit.com. For confidence, nothing beats working with a coach, but there are a lot of resources online. The trick is sticking to them and following through on all the advice you're given.

Any questions, post, PM or mail me,
Colm

Jumpy

Theres also a pretty good fitness forum here at boards.

Remember that motivation comes AFTER the effort.

You will need to push past the original unmotivated state on your own before it comes naturally, dont sit around waiting for a magical motivation burst.

the_quiet_man

Plain and simple - lose some of the weight BUT never lose sight of the fact you wont score without personality. You gotta be confident in yourself and attract attention in a good way.

you wont do that by having a bodybuilder physique and shaping all the time.
You gotta make girls laugh or dance with them or in some way make them happy. then you'll score no prob's

nice body on its own just wont cut it, nor will a bit of extra weight make you a no-go area. Laugh and dance man...

Ruu_Old

Indeed there are some excellent threads on the Fitness forum if weight is an issue and you want to sort it. This one in particular has plenty of information. Good luck.

BoozyBabe

the_quiet_man wrote:

Plain and simple - lose some of the weight BUT never lose sight of the fact you wont score without personality. You gotta be confident in yourself and attract attention in a good way.

you wont do that by having a bodybuilder physique and shaping all the time.
You gotta make girls laugh or dance with them or in some way make them happy. then you'll score no prob's

nice body on its own just wont cut it, nor will a bit of extra weight make you a no-go area. Laugh and dance man...

Bingo!!!

Well said

chern0byl

the_quiet_man wrote:

nice body on its own just wont cut it

Bollox! Nice body and good looks will get anybody action anywhere. Personality? In a night club? Personality is for relationships, looks for gratification. It really is all about self belief. Asking on a web forum about this kind of thing suggests you have none.

Good luck in the future.

Owen

I'm about 2 stone overweight, and it's all around the belly. I don't look too fat, but I've a nice beer belly for my trouble, and yes I'd love to be 12 stone too, BUT, and here's the but, I've never had any trouble pulling due to my size. Confidence? Yes for sure! I can't pull people I don't know, but if I'm introduced to someone, or I meet someone in a closed environment (House party, wedding, etc), I've no bothers pulling.

Perhaps you're trying to meet people in pubs/clubs? That's actually quite difficult! So don't let it get you down. You've probably got lots to offer someone, and most girls would rather have someone talk to them, and show interest in them, rather than be on the pull with some cheesy chatup line. Just chat, if there's chemistry, the flirting will follow naturally, and then the scoring. Girls prefer honesty!

madhitchhiker

...a few added fats ain't that bad.just compliment it with good looks and posture. that's all a man needs!:cool:

LegacyUser

I myself carry a few extra stone, but to be honest I reckon I carry it better than most. I do play footie and keep quite active but the weight is still there.

I am more or less married and haven't been on the pull in years. While on a stag a few months ago, the gang of us got chatting to a few girls. I was chatting and doing the ususal (not flirting, I wouldn't know how to do it if i tried) while some of the lads (some who are very good looking) were quite obviously on the pull. After a while one of the girls I was talking to was getting quite close and it dawned on me that she was trying to give me the come on. A bit of a cracker i might add !

I told her straight away of my impending nuptuals and that I wasn't interested but she kept persisting and I really had to warn her off. I then asked her why she kept flirting to me when there was obviously other lads beside me who were game ball, to which she replied 'who them? false sleezebags'.

So my point you might ask ... personality is what most women go for unless you are a total mess. A cocky 12 stone, ribbed Marbella tanned bloke aint going to pull anything but a like minded women.

LundiMardi

Well, i'm probably like the OP, i also carry a few(more than a few) extra stone, but i apparently carry it well... I have been told i'm ''hot'', and people usually gasp if i ever say how much i weigh or what my waist size is.

But rest assured, i am far from thin. So OP, no one can really answer your question, some woman go for looks, some go for personality. All i can say is confidence is the key. If you have confidence, NOT arrogance, then the way you look won't be a problem. But even so, rather than posting on boards about it, why not go for a walk? or sign up with a gym? Just be sure to do it for yourself, and no one else.

smallpaws

It really depends on the woman. Most women really don't care all that much, I don't think. We are much harsher on ourselves than we are on men.
Personally, I never cared at all about a guy being overweight; it's a sort of prejudice, I guess, in that though I live in a society that is obssessed with body weight/image,I don't get grossed out by an overweight other male or female person, ( or a man belching or farting, even) but if I belched or farted in front of another person myself or got too overweight, I'd be totally mortified. Some of my girlfreinds over the years have gained a bunch of weight and I feel bad for them in that I know how they used to look and how it pains them now.

mazroo

Honestly .. i would go for looks THAT SAID... healthy is way more attractive.. someone who is active and keeps fit.. regardless of size is more appealing.. Im actually a little put off by ripped up men... I have a big thing for confidance.. if u have a ''if u like me fine if u dont fine''attitude and are friendly... approachable and flirty.. U got me... I like people from paul walker to chris evans to peter kay to jayz to pharell.. so its charisma... attitude really...

smk135

i just want to say that most of my "Long term" ex bf have not been slim or well built for that matter and i usually have enough success with the men to be able to score these "hot" dudes... the last guy i was with i decided to try just dating a really handsome guy even though i was seriously not attracted to him. i was bored brainless every second i was with him (including in bed) so obviously it didnt last long.

on the other hand, as i said two ex boyfriends of mine had quite the belly and chubbiness on them but i genuinely didnt see it as "fat" and it never once bothered me.

it depends on who you meet too.

having said that, id defo be way moe attracted to a "fat" guy than to a skinny guy.

prob sounded really pretentious but i just want u to know that you are wrong if you think youre unattractive because youre not a body builder!!

Seraphina

personally speaking, like most girls, for me, looks aren't a huge factor. a little extra weight wouldn't bother me. that said, two or three extra stone wouldn't be my cup of tea, but i go to the gym and take care of my appearance, and would prefer my other half to do the same. its not just an aesthetic thing, but a health thing too, and usually fitter people will have alot more energy

Trinity

SO there ya have it - the majority of the girls say it wouldnt bother them

but the question remains - are YOU happy with YOU and if not what are you going to do about it

Heyes

I personally adore a man with a bit of meat on him. Me and skinny men just dont go together. I wouldnt let it bring you down, remember although some people have a preference, if you can make a girl laugh and feel comftorble then you are streets ahead of a lot of other blokes.

Black Swan

Everybody is unique. Their likes and dislikes vary with their uniqueness. I am into a sport, consequently I tend to like those who are fit.