Chances of pregnancy.

LucasOli

LundiMardi wrote:

So, how does it feel pappy? For the next 18 years of your life you will have to provide for your child, that mean getting a job to provide for your family, waking up in the middle of the night feeding him/her... buying clothes, school books, uniforms, paying for child care etc etc..
.

Do i actually have to do all that stuff? I thought that was only if you were married?

LundiMardi

Ok, you're either a troll, or severely mentally retarded... I'm thinking both.

iguana

LucasOli wrote:

Do i actually have to do all that stuff? I thought that was only if you were married?

Are you taking the p*ss?

(a) You are every bit as easy as she is. You both slept together and you were both highly irresponsible.

(b) If you are established as the father of the child then you will have to provide an agreed amount of maintainence each month/week.

(c) Would you honestly want to have no relationship with your son or daughter.


Private paternity tests cost from €200-350. In the UK you can get a pre-natal test from about 10 weeks into the pregnancy, they cost about £300-350. I'm not sure if they are available in Ireland.

Nevyn

Being married has nothing to do with it, you fathered the child you are responsible to pay towards the upkeep of the child.
A partenity test would prove it to the court and you can have a court order against you to pay towards the upkeep of the child.

trout

LucasOli wrote:

Do i actually have to do all that stuff? I thought that was only if you were married?

good lord ... this is something a troll would say ... you must be taking the pi$$

judybaby

LucasOli wrote:

Jesus thanks for laughing! I don't know. Tell her to get a paternaty test anyway. Because if she was willing to have an un-protected one-night stand with me she could quite easily of had others and just pretended i got her pregnant because i'm the best of a bad lot!

Typical ....always blame the woman? What does it say about you? You also had unprotected sex? Dip the wick and pay the stick I say!

Hope all works out for the unwanted baby...poor kid

LundiMardi

Thaedydal wrote:

Being married has nothing to do with it, you fathered the child you are responsible to pay towards the upkeep of the child.
A partenity test would prove it to the court and you can have a court order against you to pay towards the upkeep of the child.

Might i also add that maintanence may amout up to 50% of your own wage... so i've heard.

Darragh29

LucasOli wrote:

Turns out she is pregnant! Well i'm fu(ked!!

Good lad! Guess her mother will know now! Ops, mocking is catching! :eek: :eek: :eek:

Nevyn

Darragh29 you seem to be new to boards.ie and to the personal issues forum,
Please remember unhelpful and off-topic posting will get you banned from this forum.
Do take time to read the charter which contains the rules and abide by them.
Have a nice day.
Thaedydal

trout wether a poster is a troll or not is not your call it is one for the mods of this forum.
IF you feel that it is a troll then please use the report post function instead of posting off topic in the forum.

Zillah

Assuming this isn't a troll...



Get rid of it. You're only 17, she's only 17, this will be an absolute disaster for you both. Convince her.

trout

Thaedydal wrote:

IF you feel that it is a troll then please use the report post function instead of posting off topic in the forum.

sorry if my comment was off-topic ... point taken ... post reported ...

Victor

Zillah wrote:

Get rid of it. You're only 17, she's only 17, this will be an absolute disaster for you both. Convince her.

Thats overstating it. Being preganant has serious consequences, but it is not the end of the world. The vast majority of people survive it.

Nevyn

Zillah wrote:

Get rid of it. You're only 17, she's only 17, this will be an absolute disaster for you both. Convince her.

It is not that simple Zillah.

50 years ago they would have been made get married and have the child by thier parents and the parish.
Things have changed from then,

If you are going to have sex and have unprotected sex then you have to accept the consequences.
If you are grown up enough to have sex then you are grown up enough to be a Father and sholder your responsiblities.

Zillah

Victor wrote:

Thats overstating it. Being preganant has serious consequences, but it is not the end of the world. The vast majority of people survive it.

Of course they'll "survive" it, but a child raised by 17 year olds is at a massive disadvantage from the get go. They either work desperately hard to earn enough money to raise the child or they put a huge burden on the rest of their family. Aside from that, at 22 I feel I'm no where near mature enough to raise a child well. 17 year olds aren't even legally adults. Its just my opinion, but I think its better for everyone involved to get rid of it. If further down the line they want a child (together or respectively) then theres nothing stoppig them, leave it to a point in their lives where they can hope to raise the child responsibly and in good conditions and give everyone involved a good life.

Thaed wrote:

If you are going to have sex and have unprotected sex then you have to accept the consequences.

Why? Why should they have to accept bad consequences that can be changed? There is no child yet, its a clump of cells, not even a foetus yet let alone a person. Get rid of it and make a better life for everyone involved, including any future children.

(And if anyone is thinking "But abortion is murder! It would become a person!" then they should realise that the Morning After Pill is just that, but much less complicated.)

If you are grown up enough to have sex then you are grown up enough to be a Father and sholder your responsiblities.

I couldn't disagree more. Horny teenagers who will shag anything can have sex, but theres no connection between that and making a competant parent. They made a stupid mistake, the best thing to do now is reduce the consequences as much as possible, learn for the future and move on.

Nevyn

Zillah the mods of this forum just closed another thread about abortion due to the emotiveness of the topic.
You have your opinion on abortion but in letting you air it here it means others will do so as well and the whole row will start all over again.
If you want a debate discussion on abortion then I suggest you head over to the humanities forum.

Warning to everyone we are not turning this thread into the rights and wrongs of abortion debate. Anyone not replying in a helpful way to the op will be banned.

Due to the nature of pregnancy the op's dna have bonded with that of the girl in question and the ball of cells/potentail baby is in her court.

Op look at what your options and possible responsiblites and liabilites are and then go talk with the girl about what she wants to so.
I would also suggest talking with your parents.

Bob the Builder

I think it is not our call to tell you to get rid of the child or keep it...
Your personal finance's, education, etc will tell you what your position is.

There was a girl about two years ago who gave birth to a child whilst doing her LC and got through with 6A's... it is possible...

well either way...Good Luck!..and don't hold off on taking tests like that again...very foolish...

Zillah

Thaedydal wrote:

Warning to everyone we are not turning this thread into the rights and wrongs of abortion debate. Anyone not replying in a helpful way to the op will be banned.

Right so.

Nevyn

LucasOli wrote:

Jesus thanks for laughing! I don't know. Tell her to get a paternaty test anyway. Because if she was willing to have an un-protected one-night stand with me she could quite easily of had others and just pretended i got her pregnant because i'm the best of a bad lot!

all the more reason that you may need an STI screening then.

Faith

I really, really, really hope that the OP is a troll, but I know it's highly improbable.

OP, you provided the sperm that impregnated this young, naive girl. Now you're saying that it's her fault. It's both of your faults. Do you really want to grow up with it on your conscience that you abandoned the mother of your child and your child itself because you're an immature twat? If the pregnancy goes ahead, it will be in the back of your mind forever. When you grow up, you'll realise what a horrendous thing you did, if you leave this girl now. You'll never forget about it. What happens if, in 18 years time, you get a knock on your door and it's the child you abandoned? How would that make you feel?

You have to learn to take responsibility for your actions! You did an incredibly stupid thing, and now you have to pay the price.

I also find your arrogance astounding. You're "the best of a bad lot", are you? Somehow, I highly doubt that. Any man worth his salt would stand by the mother of his child. Even if you don't have a relationship, you should always be there as that childs father. How would you feel if your father had abandoned your before you were even born?

As iguana said, paternity tests cost over €200, which you will have no choice but to pay if you insist upon it. If you are found to be a match, you will be forced by the court to pay child support for at least the next 18 years of your life. You might as well get the benefit of having a child out of it, while you're there.

/rant

DublinWriter

LucasOli wrote:

Do i actually have to do all that stuff? I thought that was only if you were married?

I had a modicum of sympathy for you until you dropped that howler, which to me suggests that you're far younger than you're letting on to be.

When you first announced she was pregnant on here at around 7pm today, I thought to myself "uh oh, here we go, queue of people with armfulls of stones waiting to get into the glasshouse followed by various mod-threats."

If you are for real, if you aren't a troll, and if you're the age you say you are, then it's time for you to start playing by big-boys' rules if you want to play big-boys' games.

If not, you will be forever emotionally retarded and while you mightn't pay the costs in the next 20 years of your life, you will pay severe emotional costs in the final years of your life.

Unlike most users and mods here, I'll reserve judgement on you as that's normally the preserve of a higher authority.

I just hope it all works out for you and yours at the end of the day.

Talliesin

trout wrote:

good lord ... this is something a troll would say ... you must be taking the pi$$

I know it seems like it must be a troll, but it could well be real. I know of a case where a father had a similar enough case, though luckily he died when the kid was only a few months old, so that turned out about as happily as it could in the circumstances.