No motivation to continue/make something of my life

38141

What I want is the same as what everybody else wants, but the difference is I've realised I can't have it. tbh I think its just a pathetic fallacy

Rent out my house? I'm renting a house myself

Marksie

38141 wrote:

marksuttonie wrote:

OP...
I commute from laois to dublin every day. I dont get to see anybody during the week at all and i live alone.

QUOTE]

Mate, why the hell don't you sit back for a while and think about what you're doing? What's the point of living that life?

I did, if you read the rest of my post.. i also commenced a 4 day week...

I looked outwards and to the future... i have bene doing it 8 years and only have 7 on the old mortgage.
I made the choice and then reaffirmed that A) yes it was hard, and it was worth it and C) that i could effect change myself
Life has had its major ups and downs...
But by looking outward and at what i wanted to change i brought it about

It is the same for you OP... look at what you want to change and change it, slowly, one step at a time

Trinity

38141 wrote:

What I want is the same as what everybody else wants, but the difference is I've realised I can't have it. tbh I think its just a pathetic fallacy

Rent out my house? I'm renting a house myself

what cant you have? are you talkin about love and marriage etc?

Nothing is impossible. Its really true what they say about self belief. If your walking around all day with a mopey head thats not gonna get you noticed.

If you spotted a girl you liked and she was sitting there with a grumpy head on her saying i hate everyone men are ****, bastards. Life sucks. WOuld you think oh there she is the woman of my dreams. No you'd think that one is miserable, wouldnt have much fun with her.

i was under the impression you had a mortgage sorry.

Ammobear

Hi there,

I've read everything that has been written throughout the threads and I think you do want help, but find everything very difficult.
This is understandable if you are depressed and it does sound like it.
Psi and Trinity have given you good advise, but I think you are in the frame of mind where you are just sussing things out and hopeful you will be able to act on it in the future...

U CAN BEAT IT....

Try and force urself to be upbeat, it will become natural after a while....

I would recommend an organistaion called GROW on capel street in dublin...or aware on leeson st..
It's a good place to start. u can meet friends there

failing that go to the movies, see a comedy...it will lighten ur mood...

angelbaby

38141 wrote:

when you go out people don't talk to strangers

I've often went out on my own to the pub and that and got talking to people i didnt know before.

38141

I have been to aware

Ammobear

And? What didnt u like?
As I said,I've heard about GROW and for a self help group, its meant to be was almost fun...

GuanYin

angelbaby wrote:

I've often went out on my own to the pub and that and got talking to people i didnt know before.

Yes, but having breasts tends to make that easier.

38141 wrote:

I have been to aware

Go to a GP, Actually being at Aware makes a few assumptions. You're better off at a GP.

38141

I went more than a few times and wasn't getting any benefit from it and after having been there, didn't see any point in going back.

38141

God Damn It I Said Ive Been To A Gp

Marksie

Op of interest..how long have you been renting?

Ammobear

Try GROW -1890 474 474.

38141

a few years why

Marksie

38141 wrote:

a few years why

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2054929380&referrerid=&highlight=

38141

I just don't see the point to life. But why doesn't anybody else?...I think its because they're so caught up in everyday life that they don't have the time to think. That is really dumb.

free2fly

38141 wrote:

God Damn It I Said Ive Been To A Gp

Why are you getting so angry OP? People are just trying to help you.

38141

ok I don't want to give out personal information but I will now, in case somebody thinks I'm lying. I'm not living in the house that I own. I'm living in a rented property away from the property above.

Trinity

I'm not sure how other people on this thread can help you then really.

Try think more positive, if you go travelling go to a poor country and do some voluntary work.

it may depress you or it may make you grateful for what you have and more determined to live life to the fullest.

it would seem that you have a good job, are considering buying a second home, investing shares etc.

thats not bad going for a 27 year old. attend the next board beers and start talking to people. that would be a start.

good luck

38141

@ on me

Trinity

38141 wrote:

I just don't see the point to life. But why doesn't anybody else?...I think its because they're so caught up in everyday life that they don't have the time to think. That is really dumb.

because its great. because we have opportunities to make ourselves happy and laugh and smile and love and cry.

yes we will all be dead eventually but its having fun in the middle that counts.

its what you do with it.

my son gives me great reason to live obviously, i guess before him i kinda thought whats it all about.

now i know.

misery attracts misery!!

38141

Trinity, take your head out of the sand

Trinity

38141 wrote:

@ on me

thats absolutely not what i mean OP and you know it. You cant be helped if you dont want to be and in your frame of mind and with that attitude nothing anyone says will be of any benefit if you dont listen.

Is this your day to day attitude towards people?

38141

I don't like people, don't like life, and don't see the point in continuing, because its only going to get worse

Trinity

38141 wrote:

Trinity, take your head out of the sand

No 38141 you get out of your pity pot and make some friends. your obviously a very miserable unhappy person. Not the kind of person other people want to be around.

I'm happy are you? I have love and laughter in my life do you?

LIfe is what you make it. i raise a kid alone, and very few friends but i know how to smile and be grateful for what i have.

If you can think of nothing positive then you have a hard battle ahead of you making friends or finding a girlfriend.

solas

I'm in the same boat op and have been since i was about your age. I sort of burned out by 27. I have a child though so my options are few. I'd be quite happy to just die, if it meant that she would have a better life, but equally I don't want her to suffer.
I read back at the beginning that you don't do drink or drugs, I figure thats where my own problem might rest too, I don't do drink or drugs but most of the happy people I know do. Reckon I could do with getting shìtfaced every now and then.

38141

Let's think about the kid. Does it cry? Does it scream? When it gets older it will start to take more and more from you financially, and give you less and less inr return, except maybe the odd complaint that you're not giving enough. And when it's fully grown up, it will accuse you of doing something wrong in its childhood that had a negative long term effect. And it will expect an inheritance from you also.

Trinity

38141 wrote:

I don't like people, don't like life, and don't see the point in continuing, because its only going to get worse

Dont believe it for a second or you would not be hear on boards asking people for advice. You had similar problems in May and you are still here

what you want is help.

when you are in a better frame of mind read back some of the replies here, people have really tried.

strangers helping strangers - thats nice dont you think? FOr no benefit of their own other than to support and help you even when you lose the head with them!!

Marksie

solas wrote:

I read back at the beginning that you don't do drink or drugs, I figure thats where my own problem might rest too, I don't do drink or drugs but most of the happy people I know do. Reckon I could do with getting shìtfaced every now and then.

Thats an artificial solace i am afraid. In the long run it doesnt help. Some of the posters here have posted genuine ways for you to affect change.

38141

I came here for that very same reason - I thought it was 'nice' too, strangers helping strangers. But I'm beginning to realise that i was wrong in believing any of you could help.

solas

marksuttonie wrote:

Thats an artificial solace i am afraid. In the long run it doesnt help. Some of the posters here have posted genuine ways for you to affect change.

ya..but im not really interested in taking advice from strangers on the internet, in fact this isn't a cry for help. I've very much adpated to my way of life and get on with it.,
I'm not suggesting the guy become an alcoholic but an occasional drink might help releive some pressure and help takes our focus of the bad things in life.

Marksie

38141 wrote:

I don't like people, don't like life, and don't see the point in continuing, because its only going to get worse

Then sell your house, cash in your shares... use the money to finance a new life in a country you want to live in.

I did..at 33 i moved from the uk to here.. because i followed my life path

Catari Jaguar

I failed college last march, I felt horrible. Just worthless and depressed and like I didn't think I'd have a successful life. I was on a suicidal brink and was going to go to a counsellor. Sad I know... Luckily I had a really supportive boyfriend to help me through it. I decided to take up drama and art classes and get a job and rethink my life. I got so much more confident and outgoing and realised it wasn't the end of the world. I ended up getting back into college, my new year are so lovely and I am really really happy now. Ended up being the best thing that ever happened to me, not the end of my life.

38141

and what brought you to Ireland then marksuttonite, when you say your lifepath?

Trinity

38141 wrote:

I came here for that very same reason - I thought it was 'nice' too, strangers helping strangers. But I'm beginning to realise that i was wrong in believing any of you could help.

well good luck with the rest of your life.

i personally dont have time for this tbh, your attitude towards people here is astonishing. no wonder you have no friends. you obviously expected a magic wand to be waved. we are all just ordinary people living life as best we can. and taking time out of that life to try to support and help you. and your response is insults and ungratefulness.

i'm sorry you didnt get what you are looking for here, whatever that may be.

38141

Have you read their posts?!! I think their attitude to ME has been worse, and brought about my attitude to them

LegacyUser

OP I would suggest going back to college not part time because every 1 in those courses have full time jobs and socialising might be out the window but do it Full Time. You still might be able to work part time. I would also suggest that you go to one of the smaller colleges i.e. the NCI, Portobello, Griffith etc etc, with smaller classes you get to know everyone in the class. There's 40 potential new friends who will be more than willing to go on the piss every other week. The student union is also another great place to meet a few people. Its up to you really how you want to tak it from here

mel123

IMO, your expecting too much from life. What is it that you want? Life isnt like they make it out in the movies, you have to get off ur arse and do something with ur life. Ur never going to meet a girlfriend if you dont go out, or meet friends if you sit indoors all the time. I do charity work with children, children who are dying, children who have no families that care about them, they are all sick in some way. The same as i could go to another hospital and see adults sick and dying. This kind of thing has made me appreicate life a lot more and be thankful for what I have. You should count urself lucky with what you have rather than reflecting on what you havnt got. Such is life that we have to go out to work and make a living, pay bills, not be able to afford this that or the other when we want it. As they say, you only get one chance at life, this isnt a test run, so make the most of it!!

solas

trinity wrote:

i personally dont have time for this tbh, your attitude towards people here is astonishing. no wonder you have no friends.

y'know what, people never cease to amaze me. I think the OP just wants to air, to discuss some things in a cathartc way. have you ever noticed that when someone comes here feeling down about life, the majority of repsondants use it as an oppertunity to talk about how great they are and what they do that makes them great?

To tell someone how to get their life together and then decide because they are not responding to you that it's their fault anyway and thats why they have no friends is hardly valuable counsel. It's more like emotional blackmail and only pushes individual feelings further against themselves. Sometimes all people want is someone to listen without judgment.

To the op, I hope you realise the nature of this community and you would do well to acknowledge that if you are seeking comfort or just needing someone to listen then there are procedures that must be in place for that to occur.
This is a Q and A forum, so if you have asked a question then your gonna have to accept that folk are just going to respond in the way they know how.

I thought I could be negative but your attitude is ridiculous TBH. No one here has done anything but be helpful to you and you've thrown in back in their faces, in a really rude way. No wonder you've no friends. What were you really expecting people to tell you? I have the impression you think someone will wave a magic wand and a great life will suddenly appear for you. You have to make an effort. Of course you won't meet people if you go out and sit there looking like a miserable sod.

Do you actually do anything for anyone but yourself? Stop wallowing in your misery and go out and do some charity work like people have advised. What have you got against that? You will be helping people and that will at least make you less self centered and there is a high chance you'll make friends with people you meet doing that. There's no point wasting your time on boards like this if you can't handle what people suggest for you. I personally would be grateful that people even took the time to read my posts and reply -no-one is obliged to help you. At your age you should have gotten over the idea that life owes you something.

solas: people have tried to help the OP and he has rudely ignored everyone's help. There's nothing wrong with coming here to have a moan about life, everyone does that, but I think it's very rude to throw people's advice back in their faces. It just doesn't make him seem like a pleasant person to know and if he's like this in real life, it probably is why nobody is dying to talk to him. I don't see anyone being abusive, I see people being honest. If someone is going to come on here to moan on and do nothing to help themselves then they're wasting everyone's time.

38141

I am bitter towards people in general, you bet I am. How many times have I said that I HATE people.

I can say with certainty that getting counsel from people on this site has NOT been in any way beneficial.

solas

Thats fine with me, I 'm not one for loving strangers either. I don't seek counsel from people in general and especially not from online sources. I think their all (well most of them are) assholes too. heheh

Nevyn

Well then I suggest you go talk to your gp and get professional help.

38141

Trinity1 wrote:

well good luck with the rest of your life.

i personally dont have time for this tbh, your attitude towards people here is astonishing. no wonder you have no friends. you obviously expected a magic wand to be waved. we are all just ordinary people living life as best we can. and taking time out of that life to try to support and help you. and your response is insults and ungratefulness.

i'm sorry you didnt get what you are looking for here, whatever that may be.

Why wouldn't I be bitter towards some of the people here? Look at what PCI said in post#33. And the tone of what he said.

38141

Bitch

solas

dont go getting yourself banned now

mel123

but u are being rude, and in return ur asking people to be nice to you?!?!

38141

I'm being rude for a reason

Trinity

solas wrote:

y'know what, people never cease to amaze me. I think the OP just wants to air, to discuss some things in a cathartc way. have you ever noticed that when someone comes here feeling down about life, the majority of repsondants use it as an oppertunity to talk about how great they are and what they do that makes them great?

To tell someone how to get their life together and then decide because they are not responding to you that it's their fault anyway and thats why they have no friends is hardly valuable counsel. It's more like emotional blackmail and only pushes individual feelings further against themselves. Sometimes all people want is someone to listen without judgment.

To the op, I hope you realise the nature of this community and you would do well to acknowledge that if you are seeking comfort or just needing someone to listen then there are procedures that must be in place for that to occur.
This is a Q and A forum, so if you have asked a question then your gonna have to accept that folk are just going to respond in the way they know how.

excuse me i was referring to him calling everyone that tried to help him names. People have taken time to give him advice that is how he responded.

have you seen the length of this thread and some of the posts offering advice?

i didnt even mind him telling me to get my head out of the sand cos i said i was happy!!!.

his bad attitude towards us here is the problem.

if it was q&a the answer would be just yes or no but people have taken the time to try to offer advice rather than give a one word answer.

whether or not he takes it is neither here nor there and if you read back it only came to this after the insults were fired - by him.

we are not experts here but it really is a kick in the teeth to get lashed down when you try to offer advice.

take it or leave it.

38141

One tried to tell me that I was lying. Another tried to say I was pathetic etc etc Nah there's no reason for me to be angry

solas

I dont see who its helping trinity. They guy (girl) is pissed off, its perfectly ok to be pissed off. I dont believe he is looking for advice he just wants to be allowed his grievances, offering useless advice about how great your life isn't much help, it only aggrevates his feelings.

we are not experts here but it really is a kick in the teeth to get lashed down when you try to offer advice.

I'll say it again, they're not looking for advice.