Anyone else thinking 'bout giving up using Boards?

Bob the Builder

I wasted 30 valuable minutes of sleep to read this, I struggled to remain awake.
Notice how it started as "I'm leaving boards due to speed of it" and then ended in "What database to use"...

Well, I'm not going to leave at all. I have been very annoyed with the crap speed of it, we can blame software or hardware or whatever, but at the ned of the day, switching a bulletin board system may result in a deletion of every post that has been created unless a proper system is put in place. A lack of a decent search engine annoys everyone's ass, including my own.

I like Boards as a whole but when you have a few silly mods and lots of stupid user's it can be a little tricky to have a good sytem. The lack of a Search function means that, well, Boards isn't that easy to navigate then...If people cant search for it, then everyone's going to keep making the same thread over and over again...

Boards is a great website with some helpful users, but then there is "idiots" that destroy it and make this website absoloute top quality ****e.

I am seeing the tornado coming, destroying Boards, and a new Boards come's with a propr search engine, proper users and maybe good mods ...and I will stay here waiting for that almighty day to come!

PullMyFinger!

Ibid wrote:

Hullaballoo, are you anything to the bassist in The Frames?

Now now, Eck is just looking for an excuse to lock this

PullMyFinger!

Sparky-s wrote:

Digitalspy for example has no sigs or avatars. Imagine that!
Yet people complain about searches over here.

Digitalspy is always such an excellent read I dont think I even noticed the lack of avatars. Maybe try that here?

PullMyFinger!

sceptre wrote:

I wish I was.

On an extremely personal and commentable note, I got my first possible mouth cold sore this week at the tender age of 31 as a result of a brief dalliance with someone who hadn't ticked off the relevant box on my pre-approval questionnaire which I hadn't read in full, judging purely by clean and shiny facial appearance. Let all be warned: it's out there and as part of an unholy alliance with broccoli and Osama bin Laden, it's about to try to annex a small area just above your gob. The battle continues. Then again, perhaps it's just a pimple I couldn't leave alone.

I just love how Mods can talk off topic to their hearts content on Boards but no one else can. It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling

Some interesting suggestions so far and more would be good.

The Hill Billy

1. If PullMyFinger! bumps this thread again it's going to fall apart.

2. MySQL, vB, Ascending/Descending, RAM, RDBMS, Indexing, Widgets, PolyBond - WTF? The site is slow occasionally because the Admin Illuminati are in cahoots with the Jewish Taxi Drivers who have installed a top-sekrit "Slow" module until all boards subscribers agree to a new a new fare structure for accessing the Sex & Sexuality forum.

3. I'm willing to donate some dilithium crystals & a silicon gun if that helps.

DublinWriter

pH wrote:

Just in case you've gone to bed all smug, I regret to inform you:

You know jack-**** about how any RDBMS works, in particular how indexes work.

Really? I'd love to get into a technical discussion with you and maybe share some of my 16 years experience in working with and tuning almost every DBMS under the sun except for the fact that your stamping your little foot and coming across like Harry Enfield's Kevin.

Talliesin

Rollo Tamasi wrote:

i'm guessing it's a load of members who think they're cool because they have a thousand + posts giving **** to the OP for raising a question that a lot of members are curious about?

Ah, so you didn't even read the first post.

pH

DublinWriter wrote:

Really? I'd love to get into a technical discussion with you and maybe share some of my 16 years experience in working with and tuning almost every DBMS under the sun except for the fact that your stamping your little foot and coming across like Harry Enfield's Kevin.

That's hilarious coming from someone claiming that you need a special DESC index to allow you use an index to sort in descending order.

And no thanks on your kind 'offer' you're obviously full of ****, and I guess that 16 years of Access experience hasn't actually taught you as much as you think.

Go start a thread somewhere, I suggest you call it
'In MYSQL because it doesn't support a DESC index, all sorts in DESC order will require a table-scan'
Post a link here.

WhiteWashMan

ohhhhh, when DBA's go bad.........

PullMyFinger!

Hill Billy wrote:

1. If PullMyFinger! bumps this thread again it's going to fall apart.

I posted 3 times in ten minutes to quote 3 different users. Im bumping nowt.

hullaballoo

select * from dbo.PullMyFinger! as 'stfu'

Rollo Tamasi

ahhhahahahha hah ahah hah aha haha hah ahha ha ha ha haa

that's brilliant!

you got jokes. you got jokes. db jokes! hilarious!

ahahhaha hah ha ha hah ah ahha hah hah ahaha ha ha hahs ha
(is this enough?)
ahahah ha hahahah ah ahahahah hah ah ha hah aha h haahha hah aha ha haha hah ah haha ha haha hah aha haha hah ahah ahah ahahah ha hahahah ah ahahahah hah ah ha hah aha h haahha hah aha ha haha hah ah haha ha haha hah aha haha hah ahah ahah ahahah ha hahahah ah ahahahah hah ah ha hah aha h haahha hah aha ha haha hah ah haha ha haha hah aha haha hah ahah ahah

PullMyFinger!

hullaballoo wrote:

select * from dbo.PullMyFinger! as 'stfu'

WTF?

hullaballoo

Ok, then you'll love this one...

I had to google that.

Rollo Tamasi

you're right....that is a joke

Crash

what if we run the power through the deflector grid....

I skipped the 2nd and 4th page I think so this may make no sense whatsoever but I can offer the use of the farm generator and tractor.
It's not as noisy now since I started running it in the 1000 box ergo there'll be no further complaints.

Sarky

&#231 wrote: »

what if we run the power through the deflector grid....

You'd have to reverse the polarity, and THAT would require uncoupling the Heisenberg compensators while strengthening the neutrino boosters by 500%! It's can't be done! What? Oh, fine, It'll take maybe an hour or two...

Do that then lads,It would take me a few hours to get up there on the tractor anyway.

Stark

Sarky wrote:

You'd have to reverse the polarity, and THAT would require uncoupling the Heisenberg compensators while strengthening the neutrino boosters by 500%! It's can't be done! What? Oh, fine, It'll take maybe an hour or two...

That sounds complicated. Why not just divert warp power to the shields?

DublinWriter

pH wrote:

That's hilarious coming from someone claiming that you need a special DESC index to allow you use an index to sort in descending order.

That's even more hilarious...sure you can select * from big_table order by postdate desc, but without a descending index on field postdate it will be very slooooooow.

pH wrote:

'In MYSQL because it doesn't support a DESC index, all sorts in DESC order will require a table-scan'.

Couldn't have put it better myself.

Although are you talking about sorts as in table sorts or ordering as in ordering a cursor result set? You do know the difference don't you?

pH wrote:

And no thanks on your kind 'offer' you're obviously full of ****, and I guess that 16 years of Access experience hasn't actually taught you as much as you think.

Oracle, Sybase, SQL Server and Informix.

You sound like a barrel of laughs to work with...you do work in IT don't you?

ecksor

DublinWriter wrote:

Although are you talking about sorts as in table sorts or ordering as in ordering a cursor result set? You do know the difference don't you?

Well, that's an easy one to clear up. Just clarify which one you were talking about when you were referring to the boards database. After all, he's paraphrasing you.

Endymion

Ecksor, have you thought about buying 4-5 vertex 4 FGPA's and developing your own mini grid computer specfically designed for running VBB? It should only set you back around a hundred grand and a few months/years of R&D.

DublinWriter

ecksor wrote:

Well, that's an easy one to clear up. Just clarify which one you were talking about when you were referring to the boards database. After all, he's paraphrasing you.

Ordering a cursor result set.

pH

DublinWriter wrote:

That's even more hilarious...sure you can select * from big_table order by postdate desc, but without a descending index on field postdate it will be very slooooooow.

You're just digging a deeper and deeper hole with your shovel of ignorance.

The above statement is absolutely incorrect, in fact it couldn't be any more wrong if you tried.

An (ascending) index on postdate will be used to sort that query in descending order. There are some technical issues (well beyond your level of comprehension) that mean that in certain implementations using a b-tree to reverse the order may be slightly slower, but in overall terms your statement shows a profound lack of knowledge and understanding.

But if you want to continue digging, you can explain to the class what exactly is it about a B-tree that prevents it being used in both directions.

Diogenes

DublinWriter wrote:

That's even more hilarious...sure you can select * from big_table order by postdate desc, but without a descending index on field postdate it will be very slooooooow.

pH wrote:

But if you want to continue digging, you can explain to the class what exactly is it about a B-tree that prevents it being used in both directions.

NERDFIGHT!!!!!!

zAbbo

I didn't read much of this thread, and I'm sure the admin's are putting the money back into the site.

Those ads, cost what 7-8 eurp per 1000 impressions, and this site has to be hitting a serious amount of impressions per month. (millions)

Speed has been an issue for a while now, but I'm not sure if vB can handle the load.

70 odd thousand users, and I'd say around half that figure view boards each month, so the load is huuuge.

I've always thought the admins have done a good job, and I guess will continue to do so.

DublinWriter

pH wrote:

The above statement is absolutely incorrect, in fact it couldn't be any more wrong if you tried.

Oh really? Consider a table called 'bingo_hall' which is 2Tb in size.

Then see a unindexed field called 'yore_ma'.

Now go and 'select yore_ma from bingo_hall order by yore_ma desc' and you should have enough time to go down to the vending machine in the college halls, get a Diet Coke, have a chat to your mate called Gavin about the upcoming D'n'D night, return to the lab and your query will still be running.

Now if you 'yore_ma' was indexed descendingly then the response would be more or less immediate, that's presuming in the first place that you'd be using a DBMS advanced enough to support such a feature.

Sparky

Looks like the adult conversation here left early.

As ecks said, software is dearer to repair so it's a lot easier to throw hardware at it.
Even if it a case that in years to come that vB turns out to use less resourses and that we have become over powered, that isn't a bad thing. Cloud always likes adding new stuff.
Regi looks like he will be getting new intel servers. They seem to preform well above the Opterons from the tests he linked to.

At the end of the day, boards may have a few little things missing that were standard, but at least give them a pat on the back for trying their best to get the next best things up and running.

They only reason I would give up boards is if it was boring in terms of no posts for ages and to add a nail in the coffin, if it was slow on top of it.
I may not be around when it gets slow, but the times I do use it, it is responsive enough.

pH

DublinWriter wrote:

Oh really? Consider a table called 'bingo_hall' which is 2Tb in size.

Then see a unindexed field called 'yore_ma'.

Now go and 'select yore_ma from bingo_hall order by yore_ma desc' and you should have enough time to go down to the vending machine in the college halls, get a Diet Coke, have a chat to your mate called Gavin about the upcoming D'n'D night, return to the lab and your query will still be running.

Now if you 'yore_ma' was indexed descendingly then the response would be more or less immediate, that's presuming in the first place that you'd be using a DBMS advanced enough to support such a feature.

LOL - did you do some checking and find you have been totally wrong all along?

You claimed that an ascending index can't be used to help 'order by desc', which is complete rubbish, why are you bringing up 'an unindexed field'?

Ever heard of IBM's DB2, it uses b-trees (the same as MySQL), have a read of what they say:

If you do not specify the ASC or DESC keywords when you create an index on a single column, key values are stored in ascending order by default; but the bidirectional-traversal capability of the database server lets you create just one index on a column and use that index for queries that specify sorting of results in either ascending or descending order of the sort column.

Because of this capability, it does not matter whether you create a single-column index as an ascending or descending index. Whichever storage order you choose for an index, the database server can traverse that index in ascending or descending order when it processes queries.
http://publib.boulder.ibm.com/infocenter/idshelp/v10/topic/com.ibm.sqls.doc/sqls207.htm

Let me assure you that MySQL works in exactly the same way, I'll dig up a cite for that too.

So let me say this one more time, so even the someone as dumb as you can understand it :

You can use an ascending index to sort descending.

In your 'professional' work have you been asking DBAs to create descending indexes because you wanted to write an 'order by ... desc'. They must be laughing their heads off at you behind your back!