making new friends

LegacyUser

i'm a kind of quiet person and can count my closest friends on one hand, but the last few months i've been thinking i want to branch out and make many more friends. i don't want to depend on the same people all the time. the thing is, in school, work, i've always stuck with the same people. i don't know why i do this, maybe it's just i get comfy with them or i get lazy to make anymore friends. also i can be selfconcious at times and when i have had the opportunity to make friends with fantastic people i feel like i am not good enough for them, that they are miles better than me,etc. throughout my life i guess i've never had much luck making good friends. i recently finished school and none of the so-called friends from there have replied to my texts or want to meet up etc. so i am just wondering how i could make new friends. i am considering doing a media course next year so i hope to find some like minded people there, but next year is a long time away...

(18,f)

SoupyNorman

3 words;

Go to college.

L31mr0d

Join a club, organisation, team. The fact yous all will have one major thing in common from the get go will make breaking the ice a lot easier.

kittenkiller

If people seem to be becoming your friends, don't argue with it!
Don't go thinking that they're better than you. That's just silly!

College is a great place to meet new people.
But if that's not working for you, start a course or tag along with someone you are already friends with to a party or outing with their other friends & see if there's anyone you get on with.

Smile, chat and throw in a compliment here and there but only if it's genuine.
People like people who like people I guess.

Good luck & try not to stress about it.
It'll happen.

6th

undiscovered wrote:

i'm a kind of quiet person and can count my closest friends on one hand, but the last few months i've been thinking i want to branch out and make many more friends. i don't want to depend on the same people all the time. the thing is, in school, work, i've always stuck with the same people. i don't know why i do this, maybe it's just i get comfy with them or i get lazy to make anymore friends. also i can be selfconcious at times and when i have had the opportunity to make friends with fantastic people i feel like i am not good enough for them, that they are miles better than me,etc. throughout my life i guess i've never had much luck making good friends. i recently finished school and none of the so-called friends from there have replied to my texts or want to meet up etc. so i am just wondering how i could make new friends. i am considering doing a media course next year so i hope to find some like minded people there, but next year is a long time away...

(18,f)

Join the Paranormal Forum, we're always doing social stuff. Great mix of people of all ages and from different backgrounds.

Ruu_Old

Check the Events forum (under Sys->Events), theres lots of boards things going on all the time and lots of loverly people to meet there. What are your interests?

MikeHoncho

I dont think that making friends is something that you can force. As previous posters have said try to join in some clubs/ activities and see if their is anyone you get on with.

I am currently going through a situation with someone who is trying way too hard to make friends and is doing more damage to himself than good. Be relaxed about it and things will happen naturally.

Also there is nothing wrong with having a small close knit group of friends.

Faith

It actually takes a lot of guts to make new friends. I stuck with the same friends through secondary school because I was comfortable with them. It was only when I moved to another country to go to college that I was forced to make new ones. Even then, I didn't do a very good job straight away. It was only when I forced myself to go out and join some societies that I made got to know more people, and then I met their friends, and their friends friends...

You simply have to be pro-active and make the effort to meet people.

Tyrant^

I'll be one of your new friends ! PM me your MSN details !

Sillyaspie

Note to self: stay away from tyrant^ that smilie redeems nothing


loosen up, you'll be fine,
stop stressing about making friends and you will naturaly.

Zombienosh

Hmm....

1> I'm trying to make new friends....

2> I'll be your friend!!!:D

1> Eh no thanks....

Flukey

Now is the time of year to be joining things or starting new things. There are all sorts of opportunities out there. Forget about the friends element and look at doing something you are interested in doing. Then you will meet like-minded people and others along the way.

Sillyaspie

thieving.

Gordon

Sillyaspie - quit spamming

Black Swan

What do you really enjoy doing? Join a group that shares your interest.

DirkVoodoo

I went to college after repeating the leaving cert (yup, not smart at all), so my school friends, aside from 2 who repeated in the tute with me, were all a year ahead of me.

So, i was in a course where I knew no one and 4 years on I have a whole class people who im good friends with and about 10 to 12 who i would call really good friends (you know who you are). The funny thing also, is that 4 of these are lads from the country (laois, wexford, kilkenny) and i used to be a real south dublin yobbo, but we get on great (except when the conversation turns to GAA, im sorry i would rather watch chelsea v blackburn rather than dublin v someone).

So, like bravestarr said, college will change you as a person and you can be more yourself, friends wont be an issue. The course I did was a real 9-to-5 so it might have been easier to get to know people in my class as we are always together...but join a society, play a sport, etc. to expand your circle of friends.

ferdi

bravestarr082 wrote:

3 words;

Go to college.

may not work...college is not like on tv

greenkittie

be my friend! pm me your msn.

All my friends moved over to england for uni so i had to make new friends in uni. As it turns out i didnt get on with anyone in my course so that was a no starter, it just wasnt a social class. So i joined a club which had a large social factor and made loads of good friends some of which i ended up living with the following year.

atholl45

Just do what I did, throw a massive party and invite loads of strangers.
Can be messy but worth it.

DRakE

i'm open to 18 year old female friends..

Kell

undiscovered wrote:

(18,f)

I take it that means 18 & female? Hmmn, Kells sure fire way to new acquaintances may not work, but hey here are the steps-

1) Go out to pub with bestest closest friend (earlyish)
2) Get seat at bar
3) Have great conversation with best friend
4) As place fills up engage (not chat up) people who lean over your shoulder to order drinks
5) Acquire telephone numbers
6) Follow up on telephone numbers
7) Hey presto- new circle of friends

(Its that easy (TM))

Now above is applicable to males in similar situations. Not sure how I would feel as a male being chatted to by a random female- no sod that, I would be quite happy about it.

I am not sure of course how you would feel about engaging random strangers in conversation, but at least you have the support of your best mate.

You ahve to really want to meet people and then take a deep breath and throw yourself in at the deep end though. Thinking about it while eating chocolate and staying home with a DVD doesnt do the trick. Plus you only get out what you put in- the harder the effort the greater the reward.

G'luck.

K-

biko

Attend school in Galway, smaller and cosier and a great mix of Irish, foreigners and blow-ins - all looking to make new friends.

podge79

bravestarr082 wrote:

3 words;

Go to college.

ha! i've gone back to college and havent made friends with anyone and it's quiet annoying/pissy off having lunch and that on your own not to mention people ignoring you in lectures

eddyc

I remember someone saying "Friends are born, not made" of course one has to go out and make the effort to meet people but do not force it, I've actually tried that at a time I was very lonely , it dont work.