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New house, new housemates, lots of anxiety

  • 28-09-2006 1:43am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi,

    I have just moved into a new dorm for college and I'm not having the best of times,

    I have social phobia/anxiety and as a result of this I find it very hard to make new friends or even get on with people, its like a permanent form of stage fright.

    I have been doing my best to settle in to the place and to get on with my housemates but I am starting to feel that they think there is something up with me, like I'm dodgy or aloof or something

    I cant blame them I suppose becouse I am terribly afraid of being myself around strangers, this is mainly down to self-esteem issues and a lot of bad experiences in the past.

    As a result I find it quite hard to make eye contact with people ( afraid of locking gazes etc...) and generally have conversations that arent particularly genuine as I'm afraid people will know I am afraid of them.

    I want to tell them but at this stage I hardly know them and would be afraid of the consequences, there is a stigma attatched to mental illness and maybe they would treat me different , feel sorry for me etc...

    I really do not know what to do, does anyone have any ideas.


Comments

  • #2
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I reckon things will get better over time, as you all get to know each other better. Most people can accept people who have "quirks" [no offence] when they get to know them. It might also be an idea to get drunk as hell with them.


  • #3
    Blub2k4
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭Blub2k4


    It looks like you tell them you have anxiety issues or they peg you for a strange person, I'd head off the perception at the pass so to speak and let them know you're not great at mixing and take it from there. It's a better idea than allowing the rumour mill to paint you as a weirdo.


  • #4
    ams
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,443 ✭✭✭ams


    Things will get better in time. Maybe go for a few drinks with them one night and give yourself a chance to know them. Remember that its probably their first time away from home too and they may be feeling equally nervous about the whole situation. It takes time to get comfortable in situations like these.


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