From cool to fool

LegacyUser

Within my group of friends, ive gone from being the the funny sound guy that everyone loves, to the guy that nobody has time for anymore, all in a matter of months. Ive had this group of friends for the last 10 years but in the last 6 months i think ive just changed around them hence this feeling.

I dunno what it is, i just cant relax around anyone anymore and im constantly feeling awkward around everyone (this isnt just this group, its in work and with other friends too). Ive gone from being relaxed, chilled out and a funny guy to being awkward and uncomfortable talking to people. I dont know why this is happening theres been no significant events or changes in my life that has me like this. Im also a really confident guy so i dont think its a confidence issue.

Id love to get back to my old self but i think ive just changed for the worse, for no real reason.

Anyone else ever go through something like this or can offer some advice?

Black Swan

Maybe it's time for a change? Change of work? Change of residence? Change of lifestyle? Or maybe you need a vacation, and then come back refreshed?

Setun

Chat to a mate you can trust about the issue, that's what they're there for!

Ruu_Old

Everyone needs a change from their normal routine. I think now would be a good time to take a break if you can and recharge your batteries. Also people change, you might be finding that you have nothing in common with your group of friends so that could be it too. A bit of time and space by yourself, or in a different environment can't hurt anyway.

LegacyUser

Im just back from a 3 week holiday a few weeks and also just started a new job a few weeks back so i dont think thats the cure.

Although a good point was made regarding the lack of things in common with this particular group, i think ive outgrown them and maybe getting to mature for them. But that doesnt explain why im like this around everybody else in my life?

Sony

Hi

I outgrew my mates from home a good few years back,well when I say outgrew them I just matured and they didnt at all so I stopped enjoying doing things with them as much and found it a little harder to relate to them. In saying that since they too have grown uyp a bit so its not much of a problem anymore but Id say this is prob the case for you

It'll blow over - you are who you are at the end of the day

Colm_OReilly

werty,

I don't think you would have mentioned that it's not a confidence issue if it wasn't in someway a confidence issue. To test this, ask yourself do you believe it's possible to be the fun guy you once were again?

If you think back to when you were relaxed and chilled out, try to recall how you felt and what you thought when you were with people. Were you thinking about how they saw you and what they thought of you? Or were you just completely out of your head (not drunk, I mean not analytical), in the the moment and vibing with them?

What other posters said about outgrowing friends could be true. We all walk our own path and if we diverge from our friends resisting it makes life very difficult.

Personally I don't think this is a very beneficial exercise, but if you really want to find out why: Spend some time alone (say 30 minutes). Get a sheet of paper and write down all the areas where it could be the reason. Then honestly ask yourself is this why? If you've pinpointed the reason it could lead to a new perspective on it.

Why I don't particularly like the above exercise is I'm more concerned with spending the time focusing on where you want to go, and not on why you've become something.

Hope this helps,
Colm

ApeXaviour

Daddio wrote:

Chat to a mate you can trust about the issue, that's what they're there for!

Agreed, they will likely see a reason for it that you just can't. Or maybe inspire your mojo back.