Appropriate reaction to unwanted advances?

mountainyman

Look the OP was freaked out by a completely unwanted advance. A girl came on to her and it made her want to vomit.
I've been chatted up by guys and when I realised what was happening I got a little sick in my mouth.

You seem to want everything now Liouville; it is only a few years since 'gay panic' was successfully used as a defense to murder in this country.

Now gays want the right to kill (metaphorically) those who spurn their advances.

MM

Stark

Oh bugger off and troll somewhere else.

Sangre

mountainyman wrote:

Look the OP was freaked out by a completely unwanted advance. A girl came on to her and it made her want to vomit.
I've been chatted up by guys and when I realised what was happening I got a little sick in my mouth.

You seem to want everything now Liouville; it is only a few years since 'gay panic' was successfully used as a defense to murder in this country.

Now gays want the right to kill (metaphorically) those who spurn their advances.

MM

What are you talking about?

If you're referring to the defense of provocation I think you'll find its not exclusive to homosexuals.

keynesian

mountainyman wrote:

A girl came on to her and it made her want to vomit.

I've been chatted up by guys and when I realised what was happening I got a little sick in my mouth.

Now gays want the right to kill (metaphorically) those who spurn their advances.

My thoughts exactly,
I can stand these puffters moaning all the time. Uh, the world isn’t pc enough. Uh, you don’t realize the hardship we face.

MM is not trolling, he has the right to an opinion. Stark would you have us all put down for wanting to puke caz some repugnant thing came on to us. We’ve all been put down before, for our unwanted advices. How does it mater how it’s done?

Boston

MM is a troll.

Stark

kaynesian wrote:

MM is not trolling, he has the right to an opinion.

The guy has a history of trolling here.

kaynesian wrote:

would you have us all put down for wanting to puke caz some repugnant thing came on to us. We’ve all been put down before, for our unwanted advices. How does it mater how it’s done?

I would have to go with yes. Could you be more ignorant? There are ways of behaving in social situations. If you were at someone's house and someone offered you a piece of cake that you didn't like, do you think it would matter whether you puked up a little or simply said "No thank you"?

keynesian

Stark wrote:

:eek: The guy has a history of trolling here.:eek:

MM post was not off topic and was constructively adding to the debate. You dismiss his post caz u disagree with it and you hold him to his history rather then his post. Is he not entitled to his opinion “got a little sick in my mouth” when confronted with a gay, like you.

There are ways of behaving in social situations. If you were at someone's house and someone offered you a piece of cake that you didn't like, do you think it would matter whether you puked up a little or simply said "No thank you"?

The OP was an implicit NOT an explicit Question, she did not say “would you come home with me?”, she implied it. If some one ask me “what do you think of Christmas cake”, I would reply “uh, that makes me sick”. True to say, that I get sick at the thought of most foods; I have a “religious” diet.

I have read the thread and unless I’m mistake, it is an assumption the OP used the advancing girls sexuality against her. The simple reason being in the OP mind it’s not an offensive question, as it is not to me.

Boston

keynesian wrote:

MM post was not off topic and was constructively adding to the debate. You dismiss his post caz u disagree with it and you hold him to his history rather then his post. Is he not entitled to his opinion “got a little sick in my mouth” when confronted with a gay, like you.

No he ****ing well isn't. What on earth makes you think I or any other reader has to put up with that crap. Now your going to say, "if you don't like it don't read", well how about "don't be a prick on the forum". Stark didn't ban him due to a difference of opinion, he banned him because mountainyman is a sub species of pathetic scum that crawls on it's belly like a snake through these forums. He's an evolutionary step backwards, a version of man with his head so far up his own arse that if you encountered him you would die on the spot from the shear terror of it all.

Nevyn

MM trolls every forum he can get away with and honestly I woudl like to see him site banned at this stage.

Stark

Liouville wrote:

Stark didn't ban him due to a difference of opinion, he banned him because mountainyman is a sub species of pathetic scum that crawls on it's belly like a snake through these forums.

For the record I actually didn't ban him, I just told him to piss off

keynesian

well now your off topic:rolleyes:

Beruthiel

mountainyman wrote:

Look the OP was freaked out by a completely unwanted advance. A girl came on to her and it made her want to vomit.
I've been chatted up by guys and when I realised what was happening I got a little sick in my mouth.

seriously like, you see nothing wrong with that over reaction? :rolleyes:

You seem to want everything now Liouville

And what if he does? He has every right to

Now gays want the right to kill (metaphorically) those who spurn their advances.

Where did you get that from?
Honestly MM, I think you're nothing but a troll who likes to pick on the odd thread just to see how far you can push it.

keynesian wrote:

We’ve all been put down before, for our unwanted advices. How does it mater how it’s done?

Of course it matters how it's done.
Good grace and manners cost nothing and there is no need to hurt another human beings feelings just because you find them repugnant.

Annasopra

MM post was not off topic and was constructively adding to the debate

Exactly how was that post constructively adding to the debate?

keynesian

Beruthiel wrote:

seriously like, you see nothing wrong with that over reaction? :rolleyes:

Well, if I can continue the analogy of food. People tell “How good food is and how can I only eat bland tasteless food”. People, and there are very very few exception, go on pure rants about the “joys of food”. I eat volume and I’m health, Mikhail gave me full physical:). And some times my answer is “caz is make me silk”, which is the truth, or “I don’t like the taste”. Should I get offended by some one asking the question or should the person who asked the question get offended. It’s not an over reaction it’s a reality for the individual involved. I can’t say that I’d waste much time with a person who was going to be abrupt about me being gay but if I’m to be honest I know there people around me that do feel repulsed by “my way of life”. I also get looks of repulsion of gay men if I tell them I sleep with women..

Beruthiel wrote:

Honestly MM, I think you're nothing but a troll who likes to pick on the odd thread just to see how far you can push it.

I will discuss the use of the word troll and the usefulness of troll in my new Thread “Is this a Troll of a Thread?”, when I find an apparent forum.

Of course it matters how it's done.
Good grace and manners cost nothing and there is no need to hurt another human beings feelings just because you find them repugnant.

Your right, I would try and be as nice and firm as I can. So why has no one admonished abhorrent attitude of this “bull dyke”. How can you justify valance towards someone who said some thing silly, stupid and ignorant.

There have been a lot of assumptions made though out this thread. From OP that most lesbians are aggressive to the OP being the aggressor. It is most unhelpful to presume the OP was being little more then curious.

Boston

keynesian wrote:

Well, if I can continue the analogy of food. People tell “How good food is and how can I only eat bland tasteless food”. People, and there are very very few exception, go on pure rants about the “joys of food”.......

You can say what you want about food, there isn't someone with feelings on the recieving end. Someone tells me they find me repugnant, I will be extremely repugnant towards them. It's why I've this duelity in my personality of being both a **** and a Really nice guy.

I will discuss the use of the word troll and the usefulness of troll in my new Thread “Is this a Troll of a Thread?”, when I find an apparent forum.

You don't know what a troll is. Define it please if you do.

Your right, I would try and be as nice and firm as I can. So why has no one admonished abhorrent attitude of this “bull dyke”. How can you justify valance towards someone who said some thing silly, stupid and ignorant.

Nobody said the Girl attacked the OP. The OP precieved that the Girl wanted to fight. Big difference.

There have been a lot of assumptions made though out this thread. From OP that most lesbians are aggressive to the OP being the aggressor. It is most unhelpful to presume the OP was being little more then curious.

Why don't you read the Thread. The OP has said several times that she knew the girl was a lesbian prior to asking the question, so that rules out asking the question on it's own merit. She was not curious.

Stark

Split thread from here: http://pie.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055009895

keynesian

Are we now going to rebut poeple for feeling that are different to our own. come on. MM was an internal reaction, he did not say that he voiced it.

Nevyn

People can feel differently but that does not give them the right to hurt other's feelings, to be rude and uncivil.

Just because you are not into a person who tries to chat you up for what ever reason there is not need to be hostile, rude and ingracious about it.

People don't have to use words a look of disguist or flinching is enough.

keynesian

It's not fair on a person who has little control over compulsive reactions of disgust. It happens to us all, only the most self controlled can avoid it.

It's hurtful to get regected, I accept that, maybe I'm just well used to it or I get enought success to balance it.

So the answer is no, you walk away and ask the next person. You don't blow up and go on a one man cival rights movement.

Boston

keynesian wrote:

It's not fair on a person who has little control over compulsive reactions of disgust. It happens to us all, only the most self controlled can avoid it.

It's hurtful to get regected, I accept that, maybe I'm just well used to it or I get enought success to balance it.

So the answer is no, you walk away and ask the next person. You don't blow up and go on a one man cival rights movement.

I've no time for people who can't excercise self control. You own your words, you own your actions. You can and should be held responsible for them. If people think less of your due to something you've said or done, then you've only yourself to blame.

Annasopra

It's not fair on a person who has little control over compulsive reactions of disgust

Mountainy Man was deliberating trying to insult and he was perfectly able to control his ability to express his reactions of disgust

If you want to be continuously insulted then fine but some of us are willing to take that crap! Liouville is not a "one man civil rights machine" - there are lots of us who feel the same way

Rev Hellfire

Johnnymcg wrote:

If you want to be continuously insulted then fine but some of us are willing to take that crap!

I think you should stand-up for yourself and not take it.

Certainly Mountain Man is entitled to his opinion and the has the right to be disgusted. But simple manners alone suggest that a simple 'not interested' will suffice, without the need to try to get one over and make the other person feel uncomfortable. They are after all paying you a complement no matter how unwelcome it may be.

But it does have to said that nowhere does mountain man suggest that he makes his revulsion of the situation known to the other party.

keynesian

Rev Hellfire wrote:

But it does have to said that nowhere does mountain man suggest that he makes his revulsion of the situation known to the other party.

He doesn't state how he turn's down un-wanted advances, which makes the title a misnomer{was waiting to use that word correctly}.

Talliesin

Thaedydal wrote:

MM trolls every forum he can get away with and honestly I woudl like to see him site banned at this stage.

He's probably a troll, but is allowed to post on the basis that he may genuinely be a disgusting failure as a thinking human.

azezil

Talliesin wrote:

He's probably a troll, but is allowed to post on the basis that he may genuinely be a disgusting failure as a thinking human.

Ah here no need for that!

I have to admit, I'm rather animated in my rejections while drunk, some people just don't fúck off when you say "sorry not interested!", I do try to be civil but sometimes its necessary to make a show of them ;P

One example was a guy I unfortunetly kissed while barely conscious, he somehow got my number, from a friend I think, over txt I told him I wasn't interested he still came on to the next time he seen me out, so I rather publically said, "look sorry, I'm just not drunk enough! mmkay, bubye now" Gave him a thumbs up / silly dramatic wink combo and he promptly buggered off.

Boston

Rev Hellfire wrote:

But it does have to said that nowhere does mountain man suggest that he makes his revulsion of the situation known to the other party.

Of coruse he doesn't make it know, since it never happens and he's just trolling.

keynesian

azezil wrote:

so I rather publically said, "look sorry, I'm just not drunk enough! mmkay, bubye now" Gave him a thumbs up / silly dramatic wink combo and he promptly buggered off.

Just sh1t myself laughing.

I can come on strong and clueless. So you don't put up a red flashing neon sign saying "f*ck off you prat", I can keep at it. And now that I've found drink I've become dangerous.

Beside if some one is going to be rude about it, then you made a misstake in chatting the up.{oh, yes, have I made alot of these}

keynesian

Here a word some of yous posting on this thread should know Irony, and it's not me.

damien

LiouVille wrote:

I've no time for people who can't excercise self control.

Dude, you're meant to put some smile thingy after that statement.

Twinkle-star15

Do some people just not think of other people's feelings or something? If ANYONE said to me they 'felt a little sick' by gay/black/foreign/*insert preference here* people, I would be disgusted- that behaviour is just plain WRONG, regardless of whether or not the people they were talking about found out or not.

Boston

In fairness, it's clearly a minority view.