Banning children from restaurants?

eth0_

I shudder to think of the amount of nights out spoiled by loud and badly behaved children.

I feel really sorry for restaurant staff who have to pick their way around in case they trip over a little brat that's running around the restaurant while his parents sit having dinner oblivious/not caring.

Wouldn't it be nice if restaurants started having child-free evenings a few nights a week? Has this been done before anywhere?

I'm not anti-children but bringing babies or uncontrollable children to a restaurant, knowing you're going to upset other diners is well..selfish.

Owen

Please. Children should not be in restaurants. McDonalds, fine. But when your child can behave like an adult, then it can eat like an adult. I had a nice evening out with herself ruined last night by parents too afraid to tell their little bundles of joy to STFU.

MarkR

I agree, even as a soon to be father! If they can't sit down and be quiet in a nice restaurant then they should go somewhere else more child orientated.

Now, just for shíts and giggles throw it over to the parenting forum.

Wishbone Ash

How will they learn if they are not allowed in? I had some nights in restaurants spoiled by adult brats!

spurious

I was in Crusoe's in Malahide the other day and was seated beside a young family. I would guess the children were aged about 4 and younger than 2. Two excellently behaved children and parents who knew when it was time to leave (before they got bored/tired). Those sort of children could be brought anywhere.

Whether the solution is banning is debatable of course, though I wish people who have CHOSEN to have children would realise that this does in fact, impact on their lifestyle.

The same problem exists with children on airplanes. They're not able to behave? Well then you go on holidays that don't require air travel.

My dog would probably charge around the place if I brought him to a restaurant, so I don't. It's kind of simple, really.

eth0_

Wishbone Ash wrote:

How will they learn if they are not allowed in? I had some nights in restaurants spoiled by adult brats!

Well IME if they behave that badly in a restaurant, they probably behave badly at home too. Last night I was in Milano's on Dawson Street with my boyfriend and while we were waiting for a seat a family came in, seemingly well heeled middle class people, but their children were absolute brats. They were only waiting 5 minutes but the children started their bad behaviour as soon as they got in the door! Wrestling each other, pushing each other over, sitting on a table and kicking at the legs of it....

Not once were they reprimanded other than a 'shush!' from the mother. During the dinner, two of the kids were running around by our table. It was only when the family left that I realised they had been seated UPSTAIRS, so they obviously didn't care where the kids were or what they were doing.

Maybe the managers should be more firm about this sort of situation and tell the parents that if they don't keep their children under control, they'll be asked to leave. I don't think i've ever heard a manager say this to parents before...!

CiaranC

Doesnt exactly make good business sense to start throwing their best customers out, especially when its hard enough to turn a profit with a restaurant these days. Just saying.

Mr. Presentable

Of course children should not be banned from restaurants. Parents of disorderly children should be, however.

You are within your rights to complain and refuse to pay if your enjoyment of a meal is ruined by poor management in a restaurant - including allowing patrons to let their children run wild. And as a previous poster noted, the problem with these inconsiderate people does not just occur when they are out.

Well behaved children are a joy at a restaurant!

eth0_

Why are they their 'best customers'? I would have thought the opposite, their irratating brats would cause fellow diners to eat and get out, instead of getting wine/dessert/coffee on top of their main course.

CiaranC

Because larger parties generate more revenue that smaller ones maybe?

Wishbone Ash

I think the trick is to eat later at night if practicable. It would be unfair to ban all children from restaurants just because some parents don't exercise proper control over theirs. In other countries, children are much more welcome in restaurants.

No matter where one goes, there is always the liklihood of being annoyed by someone else or their actions. I dislike being forced to listen to morons engaging in loud telephone conversations or people using foul language in restaurants but there is little I can do about it. I have yet to find one which dosen't allow mobiles telephones and I don't think it would be fair to ban all adults because of this.

PS - Just for the record, my child (5) is very well mannered and has been brought out from a very young age. I think it would be totally inappropriate to tar all children with the same brush.

The Hill Billy

MarkR wrote:

Now, just for shíts and giggles throw it over to the parenting forum.

ROFLMFAO!

I can well understand where the OP & others in favour of banning kids are coming from - but totally disagree. The parents should be asked to leave with their little darlings when they start carrying on.

My lad is 4 years old. He is expected to behave properly no matter where he is & he does behave. Also, food/dining to me is a very social thing & core to the enjoyment of life with family & friends. I've tried to instil my love of it in my son. He had his first stir fry at 8 months & can now peel a bulb of garlic quicker than his Dad. You name it - he eats it, & he loves preparing food with me.

I've seen plenty of other well behaved kids out with their parents & it would be a shame for all kids to suffer because some adults cannot, or do not, bother to control their kids.

Ban the misbehaving parents!

(Or try to eat later as Wishbone Ash suggested.)

Celticfire

Ye were all children "brats" once , and I suspect not all that long ago for some.

eth0_

Celticfire wrote:

Ye were all children "brats" once , and I suspect not all that long ago for some.

Not me, I wasn't brought up to misbehave, especially when in public.

You never hear parents threatening children with "the man" much anymore
"MICHAEL! THE MAN is looking at you! THE MAN will put you out of the restaurant!".

Tazz T

Depends what type of dining experience you're looking for. If you don't want to be hassled by kids, don't go to a family restaurant. There are plenty of options out there. You can't expect to have a romantic dinner in the likes of Captain America's.

It's true that some parents don't teach their children manners, but where do you draw the line. Going out to dinner isn't the same for fun for kids as it is for adults.

Anyway, I've been in adult restaurants where customers' behaviour has been much worse than kids.

Ph3n0m

eth0_ wrote:

Not me, I wasn't brought up to misbehave, especially when in public.

You never hear parents threatening children with "the man" much anymore
"MICHAEL! THE MAN is looking at you! THE MAN will put you out of the restaurant!".

hehe and yet I have been used as "the man" to terrorise children when I am out - even though I wouldnt know them.

I had one lovely lady (insert sarcasm) tell her child - who was just crying that I would take her away if she didnt stop her crying. I was that suprised, that I turned around to the child and said I wouldnt

MarkR

Sounds like the [FONT=arial,sans-serif][SIZE=-1]Dara O Briain sketch. :-) Who the man? You the man!
[/SIZE][/FONT]

(I'm a bad man. I would have wiggled my eyebrows suggestively. And then been asked to leave.)

Nevyn

Child have to be taught how to behave and it is not those childrens fault but the fault of the parents for not teaching them how to behave and for not including the children in the conversations to keep them at the table.

Why didn't the wait staff or the manager have a word with the deliquent parents ?
Why didnt you ask the wait staff to have a word or ask to speak to the manager and make a complaint ?

I take my two out to dine and they love the experience, but as they are young and under 10 it tends to be lunch time or early evening and they know how to be have other wise they don't get to do it again.

So two children misbehaved and you want to ban all children from all restraunts ?

So two muslims/abrabs/poles/hispanics/D4 heads/adults misbehave and you want to ban all muslims/abrabs/poles/hispanics/D4 heads/adults from all restraunts ?

I have had evenign ruined by adults who do not know how to behave in a restruant more then those ruined by any child, shame those adults were never taught as children how to be have in a restraunt and in company.

layke

Am I the only one who will tell parents to control their kid?

Grow some balls loike!

Celticfire

layke wrote:

Am I the only one who will tell parents to control their kid?

Grow some balls loike!

Tell me how you control your kids, I'd love the insight.....

Ph3n0m

layke wrote:

Am I the only one who will tell parents to control their kid?

Grow some balls loike!

nope, but I normally get chewed out by the parents for daring to speak to their beloved "insert brat's name" in that manner.

well lady I wouldnt have to if you could control your children

Owen

Thaedydal wrote:

Why didn't the wait staff or the manager have a word with the deliquent parents ?

Because most 'managers' sh*t themselves at the thought of being politically incorrect by pointing out someone's little darlings are actually the spawn of Satan and ruining other's meals, for fear the Parents would get onto the local Radio station chat show, with the intention of naming and shaming the restaurant.

Thaedydal wrote:

Why didnt you ask the wait staff to have a word or ask to speak to the manager and make a complaint ?

Because I would generally never directly complain in such a situation. I'll glare at the Parents once or twice, and if they haven't the cop-on to resolve the unruly/crying child, then I'm safe in the knowledge the kid will have issues with boundaries growing up.

Thaedydal wrote:

I take my two out to dine and they love the experience, but as they are young and under 10 it tends to be lunch time or early evening and they know how to be have other wise they don't get to do it again.

But they do! I guarantee if even if your two misbehave, you'll only keep them from a Restaurant for a month or two at best. They should be banned from Restaurants until they ask Mommy and Daddy can they please come to the Restaurant, at which point, bargaining, and boundary lines can be set up.

Thaedydal wrote:

I have had evenign ruined by adults who do not know how to behave in a restruant more then those ruined by any child, shame those adults were never taught as children how to be have in a restraunt and in company.

Yes, but a Restaurant is a place for Adults at night time. It is unacceptable to bring kids, who at the best of times are darlings - but are ticking time bombs ready to cry because little Johnny got a cake and Mary didn't, into an Adult environment, where other people are paying good money to have an enjoyable experience.

You don't bring Kids to the Cinema in the Evening for fear of upsetting other Patrons, it's common courtesy to do the same in a Restaurant Environment. Unfortunately, Parents view their Children as Demi-Gods, and will flout the ettiquette of Restaurants to satisfy their own desires.

I love kids, but well behaved kids, and at the right time and place.

layke

Don't have any, and quite honestly I don't want them. However I do have a few a young cousins I have brought out to many places. Although they are well behaved I wouldn't hesitate to bring them home for misbehaving or carrying out a similar threat. Tough love but they'd learn.

Anyway this isn't the parenting forum, I want to enjoy a meal and some brat is screaming and running around my table i'll call the parents on it rather then giving them a look or hint.

layke

Ph3n0m wrote:

nope, but I normally get chewed out by the parents for daring to speak to their beloved "insert brat's name" in that manner.

well lady I wouldnt have to if you could control your children

Worth it though.

Nevyn

ned78 wrote:

Because most 'managers' sh*t themselves at the thought of being politically incorrect by pointing out someone's little darlings are actually the spawn of Satan and ruining other's meals, for fear the Parents would get onto the local Radio station chat show, with the intention of naming and shaming the restaurant.

:rolleyes:

ned78 wrote:

Because I would generally never directly complain in such a situation. I'll glare at the Parents once or twice, and if they haven't the cop-on to resolve the unruly/crying child, then I'm safe in the knowledge the kid will have issues with boundaries growing up.

I would and indeed have and will again.

But they do! I guarantee if even if your two misbehave, you'll only keep them from a Restaurant for a month or two at best. They should be banned from Restaurants until they ask Mommy and Daddy can they please come to the Restaurant, at which point, bargaining, and boundary lines can be set up.

Mine have good boundaries and the pushiment is more then just not being allowed the treat of going out to eat, they are reminded of what the rules are before they set foot inside a restraunt having had them gone over at home and being made to promise to behave.

Breaking thier word and not doing as told and breaking the rules carry real consequences which extend beyond leaving early.
When they have acted out in public ( which is rare ) the have been made apolgise to the people they have disturbed.
I should not have to raise my voice at them when we are out and they know that.

Yes, but a Restaurant is a place for Adults at night time. It is unacceptable to bring kids, who at the best of times are darlings - but are ticking time bombs ready to cry because little Johnny got a cake and Mary didn't, into an Adult environment, where other people are paying good money to have an enjoyable experience.

Again it depends on the time childern should have been fed before 8pm and should be in bed even at holiday time by the 10 the latest so late evening dining is for the most part not for children but I have had mine at family celebratory meals and once they are included in converstaion and have something to do they are well able to behave.

You don't bring Kids to the Cinema in the Evening for fear of upsetting other Patrons, it's common courtesy to do the same in a Restaurant Environment. Unfortunately, Parents view their Children as Demi-Gods, and will flout the ettiquette of Restaurants to satisfy their own desires.

I love kids, but well behaved kids, and at the right time and place.

Well then the parents are to blame, children should be taught ettiqutee and how to behave in such enviroments so they can be taken out in public if they never are they will never learn.

sexkitten

Its simply they should just not let kids in after 6.. that way if you really want to avoid them you can go after all the madness is over.

Owen

Thaedydal, you're one of the few exemplary Parents in Ireland! Bravo!

Schlemm

Restaraunts are not just for adults! Now I hate it as much as the next person when kids are whingeing all over the place when I'm out for dinner, but I don't think they shoud be banned. Kids will be kids. It's the parent's fault if their kids are out of control. If ur kids are disturbing other ppl in a restaraunt, the parents should take them out until they calm down. Long term, the parents should discipline their kids properly. Even at mass ppl are letting their kids run riot....my Mam is always saying that if she even turned around at mass she'd be roared at!

Restaraunt staff should be prepared to say it to the parents to keep their kids under control if they're going mad. It's a great experience for kids to go out to a restaraunt and behave well.

The Hill Billy

ned78 wrote:

Thaedydal, you're one of the few exemplary Parents in Ireland! Bravo!

Not to p!ss on Thaed's parade - but the "silent majority" of parents out there think & behave the same as herself. You don't notice them because they & their children are not causing a ruckus in restaurants.

Ultimately, the problem is with inconsiderate parents allowing their children to misbehave/act up - not the children.



(With respect to the mods - At this stage this thread should be kicked over to the Parenting forum - it's got sod all to do with Cooking & Recipes & more to do with people's attitude to parents' & childrens' behaviour in social situations.)

babaduck

Hill Billy wrote:

Ultimately, the problem is with inconsiderate parents allowing their children to misbehave/act up - not the children.

And there you have the truth... it IS down to the parents. My nieces are nephews are wee maggots but they know how to behave when they're out, otherwise they are swiftly removed from the location & put into their car seat in the car (within viewing distance of course ) - it's how my parents dealt with us as well "either sit down & shut up or get out to the car".

I have friends who are a nightmare when we're out - their kids are indulged, mollycoddled and generally behave atrociously. And their poor behaviour is totally ignored by their parents. But not by me. We were away for the weekend during the summer & these two decided to kick off in a restaurant. Girl aged 5 was shouting that she was hungry & banging cutlery - Mother ignored her so I went over & whispered in her ear that shouting was rude and wouldn't get her food to the table any quicker.. and if she didn't calm down and start being polite, there'd be no pizza at all. Talk about a change from demon to angel child. Her 3y/o brother decided to smack me on the arm - again ignored by his mother - so I whispered in his ear that if he did it again, I'd bite all his fingers off. He stopped

This behaviour continued all through the weekend but any time either of them were within 10 yards of me, they started to behave normally... and now Mommie Dearest uses me as a threat - "you know that Babaduck doesn't appreciate that behaviour" etc. etc. Shame she wouldn't expect them to behave all the time :mad:

Nevyn

I am just a Mammy trying to the best for her children I am far from perfect and so are they.

Somewhere along the line upsetting a child and saying no and being firm and being a meanie became wrong for parents to do and indeed adults.
This is a bad things for children, parents and society as a whole.

Children grow up and will treat other people in a fashion they see thier parents doing and exhibit the same manners thier parents do.

The parents of those children were being rude to thier children by ignoring them if parents have bad manners then the children will too.