Can it really work?

LegacyUser

I'm 22 and in final year of college.I've been seeing this guy for the past month, things are going really well, except a lot of people don't approve of it. THe reason being he's 35. I know he's not married etc, and do get on with him, but can it actually work out with the age difference?

Ruu_Old

Why not? If you both enjoy each others company and reckon you have some sort of a future together, then go ahead and be happy. Who cares what other people think?

curehead

i think it can. being 35 myself the problem i have is people think i am 25 by my young looks' so its hard to meet people of my own age as they think im too young looking ? go figure? then when i meet someone around 24-25 they find out im 35 and are wondering why im still single at my age ? there's just no winning . i say give the guy a chance

littlesurfer

of course it can work. I've been in relationships with older men and find it hard to go out with guys my own age......


....however,. sorry to put a dampner on it. But it doesn't always work out for the best....if your still in college your lifestyles may be quite different, differences in financial situations can also be a problem and difference in life stages too.

None of these things may cause problems for you too though. Fingers crossed for you. Whats meant to be wil be eh!

el Bastardo

I have heard a rule of thumb of 10 years from some people, but take that as you will (i.e. with a pinch of salt ). It can work but it depends on the people involved. Age is just a number.

Chinafoot

Like the others have said, you're both adults so if you make each other happy go for it.

All I will say is that you are in your final year and while it can be easy to get swept up in a new relationship, you should be careful not to let the studies slide. You only have four or five months left.

Best of luck.

Victor

It can, but what are you expectations?

biko

Sure, go ahead. It'd probably be a very stable relationship (guessing)

Miss Fluff

1092763897 wrote:

except a lot of people don't approve of it.

Well isn't it great to be perfect? People in glass houses and all that.... It shouldn't make a blind bit of difference what the age gap is as long as you are both happy.

randomname2005

Go for it! I think people get too hung up on ages. What really matters is your stage in life. Life is too short to be worried about what other people think.

R

Beruthiel

1092763897 wrote:

but can it actually work out with the age difference?

It can, if it's what you both want. Other people should mind their own business, age has nothing to do with your state of mind.

AnonoBoy

I'd never let my 22 year old sister go out with a 35 year old.

But you're not my sister so, y'know - go for it!

As long as it's a proper relationship - you go out with him to dinner, meet his friends etc. Make sure you're not just his 'young bit on the side'. I've seen lads doing this - just having her over to the house or going to hers - having fun with her and then casting her aside when what they consider 'real girlfriend material' (ie someone their own age) comes along.

So tread carefully.

LegacyUser

'Most importantly do what you think yourself+ not what anyone else thinks. Here's what I think though if you want to listen.

Last year a good friend of mine, about your age, went out with a guy who was 33. She was in the same dilema... is the age gap too much etc...
+ she completely fell in love with the guy. They went out for one year. He didn't give 'all of himself' to her, as he didn't want to relive his 20's again. + he was looking for someone to settle down with.
I went out with some one in their late 20's once too+ after a while, I got completely freaked out as they were on about marriage in a couple of years... I was only 19 (I'm a girl).'

LegacyUser

'Well thats what I'm worried about that he must want to settle down at some stage in the next few years. Also my family wouldnt approve tho I've met his family and theyre lovely. I've really never been treated so well though'

Beruthiel

1092763897 wrote:

'Well thats what I'm worried about that he must want to settle down at some stage in the next few years.

Well, you assume that.
Not everyone is the same, perhaps he doesn't. You will have to discuss it with him if you wish to know.

Black Swan

Ruu wrote:

Why not? If you both enjoy each others company and reckon you have some sort of a future together, then go ahead and be happy. Who cares what other people think?

Agree with Ruu!