More Jokes

xzanti

Two blokes are sat in a pub. The drunker one goes "I shagged
your mum." The more sober one ignores him and stares into his
pint. The drunker one shouts "I SHAGGED YOUR MUM!" The whole pub
turns round to watch. The sober one says "Dad, go home, your
drunk"

A bloke comes home from the pub one night with a duck under his
arms. His wife greets him. He says "This is the pig I ve been
shagging." His wife goes "That's a duck" The bloke goes "I'm
talking to the duck"

A married couple are discussing the best way of tightening their
belts
Margaret "For a start, you spend £20 a week on beer, so that'll
have to stop"
John "Wait a minute you spend £30 a week on make-up"
Margaret "Yes dear, but that's to make me look attractive"
John "And what do you think the beer's for?"

A white horse walks into a bar. The barman says "We've got a
whiskey named after you" Horse goes What, Dave?"

I like my whiskey like I like my women. A 16 year old mixed up
with coke.

A mother finds an S&M magazine under her son's bed. Upset, she
immediately shows it to her husband. "Well?" his wife asks "What
should we do?" "I'm not sure," the father replies "But we
certainly shouldn't spank him"

baztard

Very good!

miamee

Very good, love the married couple one!

fred funk }{

Class 10/10