Annoying Female Traits

Degsy

I find the most annoying female trait is moaning and complaining all the bloody time.I mean,i wake up after a feed of pints and curry with rotten guts and women feel the need to comment every time i fart.Anotherthing,why do dthey moan when i leave the toilet seat up?If i leave it down it just gets piss all over it so i'm doing her a bloody favour.Moaning all the bloody time.

Blowfish

The unanswerable questions.

"Does my bum look big in this?"

If you say no, she claims you are merely saying it to keep her happy.

If you say yes...

rediguana

My girlfriend, who is also a Boardster and who frequently happens across my posts, couldn't be more perfect. There is nothing annoying about her. I can't wait to marry her, my life will be complete then.

Blowfish

rediguana wrote:

My girlfriend, who is also a Boardster and who frequently happens across my posts, couldn't be more perfect. There is nothing annoying about her. I can't wait to marry her, my life will be complete then.

Translation: I'm whipped

Degsy

rediguana wrote:

My girlfriend, who is also a Boardster and who frequently happens across my posts, couldn't be more perfect. There is nothing annoying about her. I can't wait to marry her, my life will be complete then.

Hehe,youknow which side your bread is buttered..or should that be quiche?

rediguana

Well, it's a bit annoying the way she's so sexy and fun. I gotta admit that. Sorry, babe, if you're reading this.

Tom Dunne

rediguana wrote:

My girlfriend, who is also a Boardster and who frequently happens across my posts, couldn't be more perfect. There is nothing annoying about her. I can't wait to marry her, my life will be complete then.

You are so whipped.

It's for posts like this we wanted a private forum, but Beruthiel wouldn't let us.

*runs for cover*

Blowfish

tom dunne wrote:

You are so whipped.

It's for posts like this we wanted a private forum, but Beruthiel wouldn't let us.

*runs for cover*

With the amount that he's whipped though, he would probably allow his gf control of his account so she can check he hasn't said anything bad about her.

Tom Dunne

Blowfish wrote:

With the amount that he's whipped though, he would probably allow his gf control of his account so she can check he hasn't said anything bad about her.

Ah yes, the infamous whipped "no secrets" clause.

smcelhinney

talking?


/cowers in the corner...

The Sweeper

1. Having fabulous tits and not playing with them all day.
2. Being able to do more than one thing with their hair.
3. Excusing personal expenditure of three figures or more a month on accessories.
4. Just having tits, full stop.
5. Owning more than one pair of shoes.
6. Getting a haircut that costs €80.00 instead of $8.00.
7. The tactical skill to fart quietly.
8. Again with the tits.

Though hey, with the way some of these beer guts are shaping up, we can all have tits...

Pigman II

There's none. They're wonderful and any you list are just your inability to gain alternative perspective.

admiralofthefleet

talking

/does not cower in corner

Tails142

Those things they're always trying to impart on us... um.... opinions.... yeah, god, next they'll be wanting a vote or something.

WhiteWashMan

rediguana wrote:

My girlfriend, who is also a Boardster and who frequently happens across my posts, couldn't be more perfect. There is nothing annoying about her. I can't wait to marry her, my life will be complete then.

dont worry, im the same. although i wouldnt say theres nothing annoying about her!

lets just say she is brilliant and wonderful and amazong.

but she talks during movies :mad:

STFU WOMAN, I DONT WANT YOUR OPINION RIGHT NOW!

Nevyn

See there are reasons that ball gags were invented or why don't you have her lick your balls instead while you watch a movie ?

smashey

Blowfish wrote:

The unanswerable questions.

"Does my bum look big in this?"

Answer: "Darling, your bum would look big in Texas".

If they dare to ask a question, the least they can expect is an honest answer.

WhiteWashMan

Thaedydal wrote:

See there are reasons that ball gags were invented or why don't you have her lick your balls instead while you watch a movie ?

now why didnt i marry you?

theCzar

They can resort to screaming, blubbery hysteria in order to win the most mundane argument without losing face. :mad:

Shiminay

WhiteWashMan wrote:

now why didnt i marry you?

hmmm, wife swap you say?

_blank_

Minesajackdaniels wrote:

1. Having fabulous tits and not playing with them all day.
2. Being able to do more than one thing with their hair.
3. Excusing personal expenditure of three figures or more a month on accessories.
4. Just having tits, full stop.
5. Owning more than one pair of shoes.
6. Getting a haircut that costs €80.00 instead of $8.00.
7. The tactical skill to fart quietly.
8. Again with the tits.

Though hey, with the way some of these beer guts are shaping up, we can all have tits...

Isn't majd a girl?

Brothers, I think we have a spy among us.

Nevyn

Kharn wrote:

hmmm, wife swap you say?

You have a wife ?
Is she hwat ?

_blank_

So is Thaed...

GET OUT OF HERE.

Shiminay

she's SRSLY hawt...

And MAJD is very much a woman rather than a girl, however, she has quite rightly listed out some annoying female traits...

Degsy

Women,kindly keep o ut of this forum..there's nothing for you here.Back to your knitting and leave the important issues of the day to the men!

Kintarō Hattori

Complaining their feet are sore in high heels - 'why did you wear them in the first place?'
Jealously - God damn this is the biggest point of contention between me and my missus. She gets jealous about every other woman and is píssed as hell that I don't get jealous at all.
Movies - As WWM pointed out, talking during movies. We were just watching Dances with Wolves last night and I was really getting drawn into the emotion of a moment within the movie, only for her to start yapping away about how it's only a movie. I bloody know, but keep it shut til after.

Degsy

eo980 wrote:

I was really getting drawn into the emotion of a moment within the movie

Kindly remember where you are,Sir.

bobbyjoe

Non sequiturs.
Mentioning something random nothing to do what your talking about and then is pissed off when you don't know what she means!! My girlfriend does this all the time anyone else get this?

Chatting bout something then she'll say "yeah but what happened to the other fella". What other fella? Then find she's talking about some film we saw two weeks before!

jester77

Following on from the movies thing, one that annoys me is the silly questions that get asked when you are trying to watch a game of football, you know the ones, offside, why did he miss, oh but I thought he played for Ireland - how can he be playing for this team as well.... and so on...

Kinetic^

I'm surprised this hasn't been mentioned yet brothers.........when you go into get food somewhere, to give your gut a work out. You ask your other half if she wants some food......she says no.......you come back with food and start eating and she gives you, well not you but your food the "eyes" and asks for some...........if you wanted some damn food why didn't you say so!!! :mad:

I need a timeout, it's not even happening to me atm and it's annoying me!!!!

Kintarō Hattori

Kenny 5 wrote:

I'm surprised this hasn't been mentioned yet brothers.........when you go into get food somewhere, to give your gut a work out. You ask your other half if she wants some food......she says no.......you come back with food and start eating and she gives you, well not you but your food the "eyes" and asks for some...........if you wanted some damn food why didn't you say so!!! :mad:

I need a timeout, it's not even happening to me atm and it's annoying me!!!!

Damnit- that always happens to me, always. She always eats my food even though she didn't want anything.

Or, when we're out and we're choosing what we want to eat. When it arrives she declares that I chose the nicest thing and she wants to swap. This happens all to frequently for my liking.

6th

Who do they expect us all to be DIY gods?

When they compare us to one of her friends boyfriend/husband ... you know that poor bastárd is getting compared to you by his missus! Trying to play us off against each other is just wrong.

dr.bollocko

Being distractingly hot.
All the time.
Sometimes I actually have work to do you stupid hot bitch.
Now take off those heels, pull down that shkirt, feckin put your tits away, put on a burlap sack, make me some goddamn tea and shut the **** up. Bitch.
I know what you are thinking. You are thinking "Shut up you stupid bollucks, thank **** for the eye-candy, without that, what good would they be at all?"
And I say to you that feminism has a place in our society and we need to appreciate ugly chi, uhhh I mean feminists too, for more than just the sum of their physical parts. Sometimes we have to be nice to chicks, even if they arent hot, because they do things for us. And thats how feminism works.

Degsy

I need scarcely mention the hanging around at the supermarket till watching the groceries being scanned,the gawping at the assistant before the final realisation that the time has come to pay.THEN begins the hectic struggle to find the purse,then the farting through the purse picking out pennies and halpennys and more looking at the total,then the handing over of plastic.Sweet Jesus,is it completly impossible for ANY woman to have the monmey in her hand?

Kinetic^

Degsy wrote:

I need scarcely mention the hanging around at the supermarket till watching the groceries being scanned,the gawping at the assistant before the final realisation that the time has come to pay.THEN begins the hectic struggle to find the purse,then the farting through the purse picking out pennies and halpennys and more looking at the total,then the handing over of plastic.Sweet Jesus,is it completly impossible for ANY woman to have the monmey in her hand?

Ah brother Degsy, another exceptionally annoying trait.......I mean, you're not standing there just for a laugh dear, get your damn purse out of your handbag (which is probably the size of a suit case) :rolleyes:

John Mason

hmmmm, i am noticing a lot of sexual frustation here lads........

Kinetic^

irishbird wrote:

hmmmm, i am noticing a lot of sexual frustation here lads........

It's not sexual, just frustration!!!

Degsy

irishbird wrote:

hmmmm, i am noticing a lot of sexual frustation here lads........

Either get your tits out or sling your hook,dearie.

Beruthiel

tom dunne wrote:

It's for posts like this we wanted a private forum, but Beruthiel

hey, privatize away dude!

John Mason

Degsy wrote:

Either get your tits out or sling your hook,dearie.

oh degsy, i love it when you get all masterful, there my tits are out for you

dr.bollocko

Yeah.. Private forum.
I love it. Lets do that. Lets do exactly that.

dr.bollocko

irishbird wrote:

oh degsy, i love it when you get all masterful, there my tits are out for you

Take it to private message.
And put them away. Im trying to work here.
See?
This is what Im talking about. Part of the goddamn vagina coalition, desperate to be here, there, anywhere in the world a man is doing something useful, arguing about which curtains to buy and asking him about his feelings.

John Mason

dr.bollocko wrote:

Take it to private message.
And put them away. Im trying to work here.
See?
This is what Im talking about. Part of the goddamn vagina coalition, desperate to be here, there, anywhere in the world a man is doing something useful, arguing about which curtains to buy and asking him about his feelings.

LOl, dont be silly men dont have feelings .........anyway,i shall depart now and let you men get on with that you do best .........

Kinetic^

dr.bollocko wrote:

Yeah.. Private forum.
I love it. Lets do that. Lets do exactly that.

I feel that a private forum would be a hinderance to our growth brother bollocko....there are many brothers out there that are lost in the fitness or sports forums who will need guidance to prevent further harm to their BG.....and what about the brothers who stumble into the fashion and appearance forums looking for advice on combovers.....it's too risky going underground at this point my brothers.....exposure is what we need!!!

Long live the brotherhood!!!

6th

Beruthiel wrote:

hey, privatize away dude!

We will not be silenced!!

Someone ban irishburd?

J.S. Pill

Minesajackdaniels wrote:

1. Having fabulous tits and not playing with them all day.
2. Being able to do more than one thing with their hair.
3. Excusing personal expenditure of three figures or more a month on accessories.
4. Just having tits, full stop.
5. Owning more than one pair of shoes.
6. Getting a haircut that costs €80.00 instead of $8.00.
7. The tactical skill to fart quietly.
8. Again with the tits.

Though hey, with the way some of these beer guts are shaping up, we can all have tits...

9: Being single-handedly responsible for the degeneration of irish journalism. As the media companies try to capture more of the female demographic they increasingly feel the need to dumb their content down, pander to vaginal populism and fill their newspapers with vacuous and utterly irrelevant sh1te.
Why can't they just confine the said sh1te to the 'lifestyle' supplements? I guess its the indo thats the most at fault here but as this is Ireland's biggest selling newspaper, women are responsible for dumbing down the entire nation.

Sleepy

eo980 wrote:

Complaining their feet are sore in high heels - 'why did you wear them in the first place?'

QFT.

Whining about not getting 'toned' despite spending hours in the gym doing cardio.
Not ordering dessert because of her 'diet' and then eating half of mine.
Seeing no wrong in their friends actions whatsoever.

Kinetic^

Sleepy wrote:

Seeing no wrong in their friends actions whatsoever.

Brother Sleepy, I think this is the best one so far, you are wise beyond your years!!!

zynaps

J.S. Pill wrote:

As the media companies try to capture more of the female demographic they increasingly feel the need to dumb their content down, pander to vaginal populism and fill their newspapers with vacuous and utterly irrelevant sh1te.

Don't forget TV...
Deeeh wun in the Big Brother house. Jade is reading a copy of "Hello!" in the kitchen, after having a heated argument over who used the tea towel for drying their hands whilst washing the dishes, instead of the nearby hand towel.
Next on Channel 4: Sex and the City. Which of those trendyite, useless, slutty girls will have a new boyfriend this week? You guessed it: all of them.

. o O (We used to have MacGuyver and Quantum Leap, now we have this bolox? What happened?)

Degsy

J.S. Pill wrote:

9: Being single-handedly responsible for the degeneration of irish journalism. As the media companies try to capture more of the female demographic they increasingly feel the need to dumb their content down, pander to vaginal populism and fill their newspapers with vacuous and utterly irrelevant sh1te.
Why can't they just confine the said sh1te to the 'lifestyle' supplements? I guess its the indo thats the most at fault here but as this is Ireland's biggest selling newspaper, women are responsible for dumbing down the entire nation.

Read That bitchy harridan Mary Carr in IOS or whatever its' called...

Slow Motion

J.S. Pill wrote:

vaginal populism

Class:D