Mind games you play on your women folk?

runswithascript

Entertain me gents.

Degsy

dusf wrote:

Entertain me gents.

Ring em up in the middle of the night and then not say anything.keep this up for months.

Kinetic^

Never call them...........ever!!!

Tell them you'll do the washing...........and then don't!!!

Degsy

Kenny 5 wrote:

Never call them...........ever!!!

Tell them you'll do the washing...........and then don't!!!

Offer to do the housework but employ a few subtle tricks to make sure it never happens again.
1)Put her new white clothes into the washing machine on boil wash with your bright purple shirt.
2)Put her mothers antique dinner service into the dishwasher.
3)Put far too much salt in the potatoes.
4)Use a brillo pad to clean the new Nonstick pan
5)Put the frozen chicken into the oven for half an hour and serve
These and other clever tricks will ensure you're never asked to do anything around the house again.

Fozzie Bear

Let one go when in company and sitting beside her and then lay the blame at her door...

MOTHERTRUCKER

I tell my woman she's beautiful, funny, sexy, inteligent.
I Know i'm a mothertrucker.
I tell her she looks the nicest among all her friends, while as a matter of fact i'd give them all a good going over, leaving her till last.
Why does she think i choose her 1st out of them all. Breakfast Gauranteed!

While we do the wild thing and her phone rings i reach over and answer it and give her the phone while i pound into her. God she hates that.
I love it, especiallly when its her best friend, She's HOT. I fantasise more about her than the woman.

runswithascript

MOTHERTRUCKER wrote:

I love it, especiallly when its her best friend, She's HOT. I fantasise more about her than the woman.

LMFAO.

Forget their name or use a different random name on purpose just to annoy them.
Or if your mate texts you give a chuckle, then when she asks who was that say an ex and then sort of drop the conversation without explanation. Just to wreck their little heads!

_blank_

I wonder how many PI threads this thread will spawn?

youcancallmeal

When I know she really wants to do something but she wants me to suggest we do it, I like to tell her I'm off out on the beer with the lads. The look on her face is unlike anything I've ever seen. Thats what happens when she tries not to appear demanding.

giddyup

When you are buying her a drink buy her something very different to what she normally drinks but make it a very specific or more unusual drink..then feign ignorance when she questions it...." oh, my mistake, why did I order you a very dry martini with 2 olives on the side".

I'm still being reminded about an early 90's drink ordering incident.

MOTHERTRUCKER

When she suggests going to a new restaurant, i say "sure we were there before the food's crap - oh hang on a minute that wasn't with you".

Or when she asks me how many people i've slept with i go:
looks up into the sky
"one - two - three - four - five - six - then there was you - eight - nine - ten."
That wrecks her little head!

Blitzkrieger

MOTHERTRUCKER wrote:

While we do the wild thing and her phone rings i reach over and answer it and give her the phone while i pound into her.

rofl - my hero.

John Mason

that's all childs play, you should see what the woman folk do on you lot and you havent got a clue.......and i am not giving our secrets away .

Noelie

At weddings i give her the wrong names for my relations, so she goes up and starts to chat to them, Saying hi Name i'm Noelie's girlfriend, and they just look at her like she's crazy, crackes me up every time and she keeps falling for it.

We were talking about Richard Dunne's glazed look on his face in last nights Post match interview, I tld her that would be the Herion, and then convinced her that he's a junkie, say he's allowed do it since it's not performance enhancing

thats the kind of things I do to her.

ntlbell

irishbird wrote:

that's all childs play, you should see what the woman folk do on you lot and you havent got a clue.......and i am not giving our secrets away .

The thing is you actually think we care.

You're just female, we don't.

ntlbell

Noelie wrote:

At weddings i give her the wrong names for my relations, so she goes up and starts to chat to them, Saying hi Name i'm Noelie's girlfriend, and they just look at her like she's crazy, crackes me up every time and she keeps falling for it.

We were talking about Richard Dunne's glazed look on his face in last nights Post match interview, I tld her that would be the Herion, and then convinced her that he's a junkie, say he's allowed do it since it's not performance enhancing

thats the kind of things I do to her.

He was a junkie.

Slow Motion

irishbird wrote:

that's all childs play, you should see what the woman folk do on you lot and you havent got a clue........

That's what we let you think

Kimbot

Slow Motion wrote:

It's not a beergut it's a ManPack

I know its off topic but it should read "Young folks and their 6-packs these days.... nothing beats my trusty keg ****While patting belly****"

Slow Motion

jonny24ie wrote:

I know its off topic but it should read "Young folks and their 6-packs these days.... nothing beats my trusty keg ****While patting belly****"

Nah you see Keg implies a specific limit on size, whereas ManPack can be many kegs, and as for six packs, well if six is your limit your in the wrong forum sonny

This interlude was brought to you by BG&RH for all your manly needs. We will now return to the programmed topic........

Sam Vimes

her: are you coming over later?

me: no

her: why?

me: i don't really like you

or

me: i'm going out with my other girlfriend

who007

Sad bastards.....:rolleyes:

Sam Vimes

who007 wrote:

Sad bastards.....:rolleyes:

who the people who mess with their girlfriends or the people who feel the need to insult random strangers on the internet?

who007

Commander Vimes wrote:

who the people who mess with their girlfriends or the people who feel the need to insult random strangers on the internet?

The former. But I forgot that there's no age limit on this thing so it's possible you're all 12 year olds... (for humanity's sake let's hope so anyway...)

DarkJager

Well unfortunately it sounds as if you have been infected with "The Ultimate Gimp" syndrome and as such you have no place in this forum.

Sam Vimes

DarkJager wrote:

Well unfortunately it sounds as if you have been infected with "The Ultimate Gimp" syndrome and as such you have no place in this forum.

good point. if you don't want to get into the spirit of the forum feel free not to visit it again. posting in a forum you don't like just to insult its posters makes you look like a 12 year old, not us

burnedfaceman

stop trolling and move on

Victor

During sex, scream a different name into her ear, like "Rover, oh yeah, ROVER!!!!"

seansouth wrote:

I wonder how many PI threads this thread will spawn?

None. Dr. Demento might be another matter though.

trout

I am not very proud of this one ...

before we married, i lived in sin with mrs trout ... and we had a period of adjustment.

i kept my pc, stereo, books and related stuff in the spare room, and being paranoid i used to lock this room, to make it more difficult for a burglar to get their grubby paws on my priceless collection of sega megadrive games and 80's pr0n... and being honest, to keep mrs trout out of my stuff

mrs trout really didn't like the idea of having a locked door in her house, and she insisted i give her a key

she maintained she wanted a key, but would respect the sanctity of my priceless junk.

so i gave her the wrong key ... knowing that she could never tell me it was the wrong key, without admitting she was trying to get into the room

we never spoke of it again, and have sinced moved house several times ... but i still wonder if that makes me a bad person ... tell me Brothers, am I a bad person ?

Fey!

remind her of a conversation which may or may not have taken place several months/years earlier in which she implicated herself in doing you wrong...

Sam Vimes

Victor wrote:

During sex, scream a different name into her ear, like "Rover, oh yeah, ROVER!!!!"

reminds me of a sexual position known as the bucking bronco. while doing her from behind, lean down and whisper in her ear "your sister likes this position too" and see how long you can stay on


and victor, you sig says "Have I banned you? Don't want to be banned? Talk to me.". you banned me, i pm'ed you. you haven't written back three days later

Slow Motion

trout wrote:

Iso i gave her the wrong key ... knowing that she could never tell me it was the wrong key, without admitting she was trying to get into the room

we never spoke of it again, and have sinced moved house several times ... but i still wonder if that makes me a bad person ... tell me Brothers, am I a bad person ?

Not at all brother I think you handled the situation admirably

A-Trak

I once thoroughly convinced a girlfriend she had an unconcious habit of cupping her left breast with her right hand and lifting it slightly whenever she was extremely nervous or under pressure.

She sat on her hand during her pay review the next week.